sisters: (Default)
天海 ([personal profile] sisters) wrote in [community profile] yogen2021-06-01 12:25 am

OK overture

Who: Rantarou Amami & anyone who hits me up
What: June catch-all
When: 06/01 onwards
Where: Various locations
Warnings: TBA

mise picked for me

This post serves as a place for me to gather all of Amami's closed threads, starters, and miscellany through the month. If you want to set something up, I can be reached by PM or at [plurk.com profile] kagehira
commences: (pic♯14928643)

[personal profile] commences 2021-06-30 07:34 pm (UTC)(link)
( why hasn't he left yet? why is he still here? why does his head hurt so bad when he reflects back on everything he's done so far. he stares at the page of words, but he can't bring himself to read them properly — all he can think about is how he watched rokkun slowly die before his eyes, the way his body was almost ripped to shreds, how he kept holding him... it makes his hand shake. that was a moment where if they managed to get through that then... their hope would be stronger, but he wouldn't be surprised if rokkun wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

he isn't surprised if he dropped dead, if someone dies the next day because of him, or even right now. he's already imagining what will happen to amami right now, perhaps blood will pour from between his lips, and he'll just fall to the side — he'll lay on top of the books bleeding out, and komaeda will just sit there with his body wasting away. he should, this is how he should be with everyone, but at least he'll stay... accepting that it's him. the thought weighs on him extra hard, his nails digging into the palm of his hand, and even his knuckles turn white.

he takes a deep breath, closing his eyes, and his head falls back against the bookshelf, and he glances up at the ceiling above him. there's nothing happening there, he guesses, his luck wouldn't do much here in the first place — only small, insignificant things that won't matter. like him, he shouldn't matter, and so why is... amami still here. he can't remove him from his mind because he's an ultimate despite being unaware of his talent —

what is he, what can he do? to gauge the strength of his hope is just by seeing what he can do. komaeda's head hurts worse, so he finally drops it back down to look at the book — it says nothing that'll help him. what it does is remind him he hasn't ate, but he doesn't have an appetite anymore, rather... he has a dead expression as he stares at the book, completely tired. )
commences: (pic♯14928641)

[personal profile] commences 2021-07-01 12:57 am (UTC)(link)
( as the unknown books are placed in his lap, komaeda's attention falls down to look at what's there now courtesy of amami, and as he drops his eyes onto it... it's different. this isn't his choice of reading, but he stares at the front of the book, or the page that amami has chosen for him to look at. he doesn't move his hands to engage just yet, instead, he thinks about what he's supposed to do with this. open his mind to various locations or read about who lives where, it's not an idea that's ever crossed his mind, but he doesn't have reason to push away.

rather, he's too tired to actually push it away. )


...

( it takes him a few moments, but once he's able to unball his hand, there's a few crescent indentions in his palm, and he lifts it to place a hand over the book. his fingers drum along the surface before he moves his hand under to pull at the book he was "reading" moments ago — amami can see how visible komaeda's hand shakes as he sets the mystery book to the side. he doesn't want too much on his legs because it feels like a reaction that he wants to jump up just in case of any changes — who knows what will happen.

his hand lays flat on the biology book now, he's taking awhile to do anything, but at least there's movement? )
commences: (pic♯14928531)

[personal profile] commences 2021-07-01 04:03 am (UTC)(link)
( his eyes look over to the piece of paper written to him, he makes an effort to read the first two words "books and photos," and he is almost against it. he doesn't want to do anything that applies effort, but he doesn't watch as amami gets to his feet, nor does he catch the wave, and the way the other turns on his heel to leave out from the library. it's still quiet, he's alone now, he's nestled up in this area where only one person knows, and no one can tell him anything but the note left to him.

this time, he tries to read a little more as he raises a hand to run through his hair tired while he exhales, and it doesn't get caught on any of the knots as it passes through. as he continues the note, they have been trapped in here for quite awhile, and it stands out to komaeda, it's been the same scenery for months... and he feels anxious, his hand tightens in the mass of his hair —

if he took a break — he yanks. if he just didn't exist — he yanks again. if he was just dead — he pulls harder, flinching until he feels some hair in his hand through blurry vision.

would hell... be a nice place to be? )