( he's quiet for a moment, letting them cling to him with a vice grip, and all the while rubbing the same slow circles against their back.
it's only when he makes his decision that he slowly pauses the motion, voice quieter when he speaks up again, but close enough for them to hear with ease. it's story time... )
I must've mentioned it before... but I have a little sister too. She'd be around your age now, maybe a little bit older. ( hard to pin it when he's guessing at theirs. )
Anyway, when I was a kid, my whole family took a trip to another country on a boat. We got there and I— I wanted to explore, y'know? I thought I could sneak off the boat for a little while, look around, but... I didn't realize that she'd followed me. I didn't even notice. And then... somehow, she must have gotten separated from me, because she never... she never came back, after that. I...
( he bites his tongue, trailing off there. instead he takes a deep breath. in, and then a little shakily, out again. )
You asked why I'm away from home so often... The truth is, the reason I go to so many places, and I'm always traveling — it's to find her.
Sometimes I worry that— I worry that she might be thinking the same thing as you are right now. That she might think I left her behind on purpose, that I didn't want to look after her. That she might think watching her was an obligation, or that she won't forgive me when I finally do find her, for leaving her alone all that time.
( ... )
But I'll never stop looking. I'll search every inch of every country if I have to.
I'm sure... it must be the same for your brother. That no matter what, he'd do everything in his power to get home to you.
( sorry, rokkun, but he's projecting here. and maybe he should have spoken to rokkun himself, rather than trusting komaeda with that, if this was how it was going to end up. if this was how keigo felt about what happened, but... no matter what rokkun feels, amami's going to decide that for him right now. because he knows what it's like, to be an older brother. he knows what it's like to leave your little sibling behind — to fail them like this. and keigo... it's not their fault that they don't know, but somebody needs to tell them, so amami will. )
When you're a big brother, that's what you do for your younger siblings. You're there for them, and you come back for them — not because you have to, not because you feel responsible, but because you want to. You want to take care of them because they're precious to you.
sorry for the full-length novel
( he's quiet for a moment, letting them cling to him with a vice grip, and all the while rubbing the same slow circles against their back.
it's only when he makes his decision that he slowly pauses the motion, voice quieter when he speaks up again, but close enough for them to hear with ease. it's story time... )
I must've mentioned it before... but I have a little sister too. She'd be around your age now, maybe a little bit older. ( hard to pin it when he's guessing at theirs. )
Anyway, when I was a kid, my whole family took a trip to another country on a boat. We got there and I— I wanted to explore, y'know? I thought I could sneak off the boat for a little while, look around, but... I didn't realize that she'd followed me. I didn't even notice. And then... somehow, she must have gotten separated from me, because she never... she never came back, after that. I...
( he bites his tongue, trailing off there. instead he takes a deep breath. in, and then a little shakily, out again. )
You asked why I'm away from home so often... The truth is, the reason I go to so many places, and I'm always traveling — it's to find her.
Sometimes I worry that— I worry that she might be thinking the same thing as you are right now. That she might think I left her behind on purpose, that I didn't want to look after her. That she might think watching her was an obligation, or that she won't forgive me when I finally do find her, for leaving her alone all that time.
( ... )
But I'll never stop looking. I'll search every inch of every country if I have to.
I'm sure... it must be the same for your brother. That no matter what, he'd do everything in his power to get home to you.
( sorry, rokkun, but he's projecting here. and maybe he should have spoken to rokkun himself, rather than trusting komaeda with that, if this was how it was going to end up. if this was how keigo felt about what happened, but... no matter what rokkun feels, amami's going to decide that for him right now. because he knows what it's like, to be an older brother. he knows what it's like to leave your little sibling behind — to fail them like this. and keigo... it's not their fault that they don't know, but somebody needs to tell them, so amami will. )
When you're a big brother, that's what you do for your younger siblings. You're there for them, and you come back for them — not because you have to, not because you feel responsible, but because you want to. You want to take care of them because they're precious to you.