yogen | ☆ let's start a brand-new song ☆

Who: Subaru & Rantarou
What: (sweating) so what're you doing up here
When: 9/15, but Before the family meet. skipping class
Where: fourth floor, right side
Warnings: none right now

[subaru has to go up this way when he's preparing for the S5 meetings he plans to hold once a week minimum, since it's sort of hard to lug telescopes through a window, so he's gotten used to the sight of the cleared hallway, the skeleton of something that was once there and no longer, the rocks piled up on either side...

it's still creepy in a way, like. they could totally do a test of courage up here some night!!!! that'd be so cool!!!!! actually, they could totally dress this place up more around halloween and—

anyway. he's hanging around with a notebook and pen today, resting his back on one of the more solid frameworks of a classroom, star chart rolled out beside him as he notes coordinates and the like for a future viewing... this is a perfectly good reason to skip class today.

... he doesn't really want to go and act normal, with the thought of talking about what was found in the pool only a few nights ago weighing in the corner of his mind. acting normal so far has sucked.]

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That's a good thing, isn't it? We'll never find answers if we don't ask any questions.

( he did warn subaru that he had a lot of things to think through here. )

Anyway, when I was asking about when the rules changed and why, he mentioned something to me. A while back there was a fire, right? Apparently after the school was fixed up and the students came back, they were a lot more tense than in the years before — at least, from what he could tell.

[HE DID WARN SUBARU BUT SUBARU WASN'T AWARE HE'D START TO GET REALLY INVESTED IN IT TOO!!!! he lowkey loves mysteries they're fun to read about and solve with friends!!!!!]

... You think we could find out how long ago? We oughta be able to ask some of the alumni about it, I'll bet some of the teachers graduated from here. I wonder why they got so tense, though~. It's probably hard to come to school after something like that, sure, but did they think that it could happen again? Or maybe something else happened during it~? Ooooh, I sorta wanna find out myself now! It sounds fun!

[he's back to being interested in history outside of his very attractive classmate talking about it]

The timeframe I was given was just "many years ago." It might be worth checking out though, maybe there'd be some kind of records or newspaper clippings in the library too?

( most school libraries keep newspapers, right? that's normal. )

And I have a hunch that something else happened too, but... Well, what's important to know about it, is that there were a lot of students who died, so I was wondering if it might have to do with why this wing of the school is like this. You know what these are, don't you?

( he nods his head at literally any direction probably because this place is filled with rocks. )

They look like Kudo-chan's gorinto! But like, broken up. Right?

[because death... rocks... it connects. subaru'll take some of them nearby, trying to fit them together. of course they don't go together, really; there's so many of them here, it'd be hard to actually... rebuild one.]

Me, Sai-chan, and Nene talked to her. It was...

[...]

Well, she "said" some interesting things~, but I still dunno what it all means. I felt bad for her, though, like... [...] Can you imagine it? Reliving the moment you died, just 'cause of a bunch of stones.

[... oh, he's remembering something else now, and it's making him feel itchy. a very particular set of words, and the confirmation that came with it.]

Oh, that was you! But wow...

( he's about to say more, but then subaru's words really start to sink in, and he goes quiet for a moment. )

Reliving the moment you died, huh? ( ... that definitely wasn't mentioned in the notes amami copied down. ) That must be why...

( oooohhhhh, okay. don't like that. )

[look he don't either]

Yeah, and... some other stuff... that I didn't really wanna think about when I pretty much just-- what do they call it? Woke up? Whatever. It's depressing~.

[and. terrifying.]

So I'm kinda glad these things are all broken up, even if it means we can't talk to them or anything.

The fact that they are is kinda depressing too though.

( who's to say that just 'cause they're broken up doesn't mean the same still holds true? it feels bad that they were here in the first place. it feels bad that they fell apart. it's just not a really fun thought to go over no matter how you spin it. )

Sorry, Akehoshi-kun, but I'm gonna have to ask you to think about it for me. Something tells me that knowing more about this place is pretty important.

[figures.......... subaru cracks open his notebook, the one he'd been writing in, and his hand gestures seem more focused on the margins this time, with rhythmic strokes of his pen. drawing daikichi helps a little, at least, since amami's right... and maybe once he tells someone, he won't have to a second.]

Probably. 'Cause it's sort of like a holding ground, from how she described it.

[turns out the nurse's office isn't going to be the first place amami knows of subaru's keen memory.]

Everyone comes back. Graduates and anyone else. We've come back too. From... y'know. [... this is the hard part. the part he wishes he could just laugh off and say "just kidding ☆" with a smile--]

The dead.

She seemed mad that we didn't remember any of that. Or that the others — mostly everyone who dies — their souls are in the big tree out there.

[the wisteria, he means.]

"Sometimes you die and your soul is reborn anew, given another chance at life. Sometimes you're beyond help and you cease to exist."

And sometimes you're in limbo because a couple of teens decided to ask you question they oughta know the answers to already. [...] Third years don't usually get to repeat, though, unless the president's contract says so.

[so.

don't die. (:]

Oh...

( ... )

So it is like that.

( he'd had suspicions — had expressed them to someone before, but they didn't quite hold. had nothing to confirm them, and so he had to move on in uncertainty. in any case, it's not news to him that he's dead, but he knows... that it must be a hard fact for someone else to come to terms with. especially... the ones who are younger, safer, with their whole lives to live ahead of them.

it's not that amami isn't upset, it's just...

...

he breathes a heavy sigh. )

Got it. Sorry for making you dredge all that up, but... it's pretty important to know. It helps a lot, actually.

S'okay. Kinda nice having someone else know.

[now he can safely repress it again.]

I kinda hoped that I would've been able to travel the world before I died, [the single tally mark ever present on his wrist, unhealing and sore to the constant touch he gives it when he's alone,] but I guess something happened in the jungle.

[assuming that how they end up in this purgatory is death,]

Yeah...

( he wants to apologize. for what, he's not sure, but... the weight of this knowledge slowly begins to settle on him, running a hand through his hair as his mind begins to race through all of the things this means. for him. for the people he's come to care about here.

this sucks.

but he'll swallow it down, meet subaru's gaze with an apologetic smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes — they don't often do. )

I get it. There was... something important that I needed to do, too. But I guess it makes sense why everyone wants to graduate now.

( at least they've figured out the first half of step one: why they're here. )

[yeah no joke. the lack of it reaching amami's eyes is something that's familiar to subaru, actually, because he's seen it on others before (eichi, for example, as a midorikawa character,) and he points at him with his pen--]

We're totally screwed if we don't. Now you've definitely gotta attend class, 'cause even if this school's weird you don't wanna be held back just 'cause you skipped!

[he wouldn't be surprised if that's the one thing that stays the same.

and then they both proceed to skip several days in a row later but look, that's different.]

☆ let's start a brand-new song ☆

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