non-murder December mini-event

[adsum]

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12/01 06:47

briiiiinngg...! briiiiinngg...! briiiiinngg...!
The telephone in the principal's office is ringing.

OOC

✽ The temperature inside the principal's office is still sub-zero, so please take note before sending easily frozen characters inside. I'll have to delete the non- part of the post title, then.
✽ The post may be used to ICly discuss whether to answer the phone in the first place, and if so, who to send. Mod responses will happen if/when the phone is answered.

Comments

[rearranger]

Yeah, yeah...

[ Is that in response to it being cold, or is it a confirmation? The answer is yes. He's more worried about the walkie talkie, actually. Ranger was built to be able to handle just about all temperatures, but a lot of electronics still had their batteries killed by the extreme cold. Actually, he's pretty sure that a lot of phones will still die if you try using them when it's cold enough.

And following the long honored ASUNARO Floormaster tradition, he's going to be turning on his heel and into the room before anyone can blink, tucking away his face cards so he can pick up that phone shortly after. Was it going to be something stupid, or a trap, or both? Endless possibilities. ]

Y'ello.

[ Annnd let's see how well this walkie talkie is gonna hold up. ]

[adsum]

[ HHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhh—-

It's the static of white noise on the other line, a sound like wind whipping against a phone receiver for several seconds before Ranger is able to pick up a voice— no, voices— on the other line, but distant, as if whoever is speaking is standing several meters away: ]

Hey! Finally somebody's— HAVE YOU SEEN MY—- Shut up! We're not here to mmmmrrphhmnm—!

[ the sound of somebody forcing a hand off their mouth, somebody else getting socked, followed by a yell of pain ]

Hah... Ignore them. Who are you?

[ Ranger can tell that the walkie-talkie battery is indeed draining quickly, although the phone still seems to be in working order. He probably shouldn't rely on the other party to keep things short and sweet. ]

[commences]

( okay, enough dehumanizing nice, he's going to squat next to add so that they can put the walkie talkie next to their ears so they can listen in. )

[rearranger]

[ Well, that answers one question. Ranger rolls his eyes.

He considers avoiding saying his name altogether, but it's not likely to matter. Beside that, somebody has to get to the point here. ]

Ranger, would've gotten ya sooner if you didn't call the walk in freezer. So, whatchya want?

[adsum]

Why the fuck is there a phone in the— OUCH! Shit, fuck, fine. ...Goddamnit. We're trying to save your dumb asses. Can one of you get to the forest so we can— STOP THAT! Sorry, not you. Look, we don't have much time. Are you— I just want to— NO.

[ ...There sounds like at least five or six other people on the other line, of various genders and various ages, and not the most coordinated bunch either. They don't seem to be friends, but they don't sound as if they're strangers to one another either.

The possibility of hanging up is still on the table. ]

[rearranger]

[ As tempting as that is, he settles for another exaggerated eye roll and an even more exaggerated shrug as he waves the walkie before pulling it back. They need a queue or something over there. ]

One at a time, kiddos, I'm listening. [ Because he has to. ] Somebody to the forest, 'kay. What else?

[subtract]

We can't get into the forest. Ask them why we need to go there.

[shouting across the room from the doorway even tho the walkie talkie is right there, it's fine]

[commences]

What do you mean we can't? We have all sorts of tools to scout outside.

( come on add, you have a drone that can go out there for them, they also have certain circular being at their disposal. )

Also please don't shout...

[subtract]

If it's something that can't be done by a drone, it'd be a waste of time if we didn't check. [imagine if they were just gonna try and help everyone escape by leading them out through the woods but the only one that shows up is ball monokuma and then rokkun blows up the school so we get the ball monokuma ending, how tragic would that be]

[commences]

( WAIT. turns off walkie. )

We could take one of them hostage if we sent something out there.

( okay, but rokkun is waiting down the months, okay? we're going to calm him down, or whatever plan i have in store, but what i mean is that... would be tragic especially when ball monokuma has their canon yogen memories.

...turns back on walkie. )

[adsum]

-—a large bag, maybe a knife, Don't forget the payment! Oh, yeah. Hope you guys have been working hard racking up those merit points. Also snacks! And water! Or, I guess there's the river... The fuck? That's so gross. Don't tell me you drank from the— Fish pee in rivers, you know? That's not how it works! Actually, it is.

[ ...

Anyways, it sounds like a several day trip travel pack and a wealthy person's PDA is what's being recommended here, also not to drink river water. ]

[rearranger]

[ At some point during the conversation Ranger shifted the phone to his shoulder and tugged the PDA out of his pocket. He turns away, leaning back on the desk. He's been clicking rapidly on it, and that continues as he listens and responds.

At least they're talking in complete sentences now. ]

Forest is inaccessible. What're you trying to save people from, how, and why? Gimmie a bit more to go off of here, 'cause it's below zero in this room, and so far all I've gotten is that you bastards are lost in the wilderness.

[ At the same time he pulls up the network and -

@n.komaeda Gur jnyxvr-gnyxvr jvyy or qrnq va n zvahgr be gjb.
@n.komaeda Guvf vf cebonoyl snfgre, naljnl.
@n.komaeda Gurer zvtug or svir be fvk crbcyr ba gur bgure yvar; qvssrerag traqref naq ntrf.
@n.komaeda Gur qhzo onfgneqf xrrc gnyxvat bire rnpu bgure.
@n.komaeda Fgnegrq bss jvgu: "Jr'er gelvat gb fnir lbhe qhzo nffrf. Pna bar bs lbh trg gb gur sberfg fb jr pna" [...] "Ybbx, jr qba'g unir zhpu gvzr."
@n.komaeda Vg V unq gb thrff, gurl jnag fbzrobql gb gnxr n frireny qnl fheiviny cnpx gb fbzr haqrsvarq cynpr va gur sberfg gb zrrg hc jvgu gurz.
@n.komaeda Gurl'er rvgure ernyyl onq pba negvfgf, be ernyyl tbbq ng snxvat vapbzcrgrapr.
@n.komaeda Vg qbrfa'g fbhaq yvxr gurl unir nalguvat jbegujuvyr gb bssre.
@n.komaeda Gjb zvahgrf.

No kaomojis.

...

@n.komaeda ヽ(`⌒´メ)ノ

Just the one kaomoji.

He starts the timer in his head. It's possible that they'll see it and have their feelings hurt, but at that point, negotiations will just end early. ]

[commences]

( it's consecutive dings from his jacket pocket, and komaeda reaches down to unlock his pda, given the motion, he's sure that someone like shin will check his too with ranger visibly inside tapping at his own pda, and komaeda's sure that he'll show sara; add's already next to komaeda, so he'll lean to him so he can see. )

@r.ranger guvf ragver fpubby vf fheebhaqrq ol n sberfg, pna lbh trg gur pbbeqvangrf be juvpu jnl jr fubhyq pbzr sebz gb zrrg gurz.
@r.ranger vg fbhaqf yvxr n tnzoyr, ohg qbrfa'g uheg gb gel.
@r.ranger gnxr gurz hc ba gurve bssre.
@r.ranger rira vs gurl qba'g unir nalguvat hfrshy, jr pna cebonoyl oevat bar onpx.
@r.ranger gurl znl or vqvbgf, ohg gurve ubcr vf cebonoyl vagrerfgvat.
@r.ranger yrg'f frr jung gurl unir va fgber sbe hf, funyy jr?
@r.ranger ૮ • ﻌ - ა

[adsum]

[ In between all the typing, there's a bark of laughter at "lost in the wilderness" ]

Aren't you the sorry bastards stuck at school? Man... This is a bust. I can't believe you're wasting your perk on these punks, Tomori. Yeah, well I did, so let's not waste it. Right? You heard what they did to Okane... You know what's going to happen.

[ the white noise gets a little louder ]

Hey, are you still listening? 54.2 N, 45.2 E. December 15. Make sure somebody's there.

[rearranger]

[ Well, well... That was a far more interesting reaction. For all of his agitation, he's pleased with this outcome. He's an AI, and so everything from the shift in tone to the names are perfectly committed to memory.

Which was it, which was it... Hm. Had they been expecting something else, or was it overconfidence, or perhaps he had just struck a nerve? ]

Hmmm? Did you not know what number you were calling? First you call a freezer, then it's a wrong number... Boy, that's embarrassing.

[ Hey yawns despite having absolutely no need to, watching the air before him cloud as he exhales. Rather than let himself get worked up any further, he doubles down on the behaviors he knows so well. ]

I got it, I got your neat nice little list too. You seem like such cute kids, so don't worry, I'll make sure to be there~ ♪

[ He's almost certain that the call is about to drop, but this seems like an acceptable note to end on. Click, click, click... What the Hell are those idiots doing out there? He can't believe he has two sets, and he isn't sure which is worse.

@n.komaeda V guvax V fgehpx n areir. V pna'g vzntvar ubj.
@n.komaeda V'ir orra ba zl orfg orunivbe... (＞﹏＜)
@n.komaeda V guvax V unir jung jr arrq. V'z nyzbfg qbar.
@n.komaeda ฅ(•ㅅ•❀)ฅ ]

1/?

[commences]

( he's reaching for his pda after... that mystery person gets off of him, and he'll look at his replies...

...

...

...

he's late when he sends this. )

@r.ranger jura lbh gryy zr nobhg vg...
@r.ranger gnxr lbhe gvzr...
@r.ranger guvf tnir zr n urnqnpur.
@r.ranger ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა

2/2

[commences]

@r.ranger lbh qvq terng.

[adsum]

Hehe... he called us cute. He was being patronizing, dumbass. CAN IT, YOU GUYS! Ranger, one more thing: Absolutely do not forget the payment, alright? You have to—- ow! What the fuck is your problem?! Please, I need to know if she's okay! Hello? Can you hear me? My sister, her name is Haru—-

[ The line cuts off here. This is all from me until the 15th, enjoy your pizza. ]