この気持ち…伝わってるといいんすけどね (12/31)

[commences]

Who: Hajime Hinata & friends
What: Happy birthday, Hinata-kun!
When: December 31, 9PM~
Where: School roof
Warnings: N/A, TBE

( there's various hidden signs that point towards the elevator, and if anyone catches sight, they'll see an arrow that points up, indicating for them to take it skyward. if they get off too early, there's a sign on the floor that reads, "next stop!", so if they dare, they can go back into the elevator and do as the words command. upon making your way to the rooftop on new year's eve, the setup is immediately apparent.

a number of glittering, sparkling decorations line the area — streamers, balloons, music, and a brightly colored sign the reads: happy birthday hinachan. at the heart of the setup is a bonfire that reaches almost shoulder-height — properly set up to make sure it doesn't spread anywhere further than its containment area, it sets a festive tone.

"borrowed" desks are also covered in an array of treats and appetizers courtesy of nene and amami, as well as enough love setsugetsukka to "make 3 people black out," which is probably enough to share if nobody gets too ambitious. the cake at the center of it all is the real star of the show however, almost as big as a person all on it's own.

to top it all off, even under the dim glow of the stars, nobody is short of a little light when natsume and noah's dazzling light show begins. once the main event has closed, a variety of firecrackers are brought out to celebrate with as things begin to wind down. varieties include the classic sparklers, these little spinny bitches, funky little sparkshowers, some little baby rockets, with the larger varieties spanning a couple feet at most. on the opposite side, there's a little table where a birdhouse is kept, and inside stuffed with all sorts of cotton and wood shavings are two birds huddled together inside, and a few treats that people can feed them if interest. if keigo looks at your character from afar, it's fine, that birdhouse they're living in was made by them, after all.

and at the centre of it all will be one boy with a bag over his head, kidnapped by rokuro arata, who sits him down and lets komaeda undo his blindfold — happy birthday, hinata-kun! )

Comments

[rearranger]

[ Rio switches to the ice cream cone in time to see the ball drop out of his hand. Whatever he had been hiding, it's gone now, and there's only the slight frown that can't be seen behind the card. He's still thinking though, trying to determine the exact situation and apply his feelings to it, while also trying to apply it in such a way that he can come to a logical conclusion. To have all of his emotions made it easier in ways, and yet, it made it harder. Emotions were like a poison, destroying logic and rational thought by presenting itself as a valid choice.

Komaeda is emotional, and he watches drops without any particular worry about the motion. He's upset, and he's making it known, and Rio think she's not all that unlike the birds that he keeps, or perhaps the white cat that comes around the school. Sensitive and moody and needy. But unlike a bird or a cat, he's a human who can express himself in such a way. The tightness in his chest hasn't dissipated, and his hand comes up to touch it briefly, fingers curling, but he works his way through it as readily as anything else. ]

... Red. I like blue, too. I like vibrant colors.

[ Red and blue and purple and green. Rio steps over, looking directly at him without caring if it's returned. He seems to have finished collecting his thoughts. It always takes him longer than most.

It's late, but he responds to what he considers to be one of the two original issues, ]

You're "Nagito" to me, just like Sara is Sara, and Satou is Satou. I've heard you out, and I think I more or less get it, so I think if you don't like it, you should do something about it.

[ What does that mean? He doesn't say, leaving it for Komaeda to say instead. He listens, and he understands, but there's no effort behind it. There's no logic. There's just that discomfort and disquieting feeling without anything to back it up. ]

But if you just wanna be treated like somebody who's so frail that they can't handle their name being said, then I can't help you with that one. But in return, you can call me whatever you want, 'kay? 'Cause I have no attachment to my name.

[ It's not even the name he was meant to have, after all. But having said that, he shifts beside him. He doesn't expect a positive reaction, but that's fine. Komaeda doesn't want to be treated as frail, and he doesn't want to be different from others, and Ranger has paid mind to that in the same way he does to Helena. He's sickly, and she's disabled, but neither one needed to be pampered nor have their hand held.

It's harsh and cruel because he doesn't know how to be anything but, and yet this too is consistent. Those feelings were valid, and he's tucked them away and held them close, but he can't abide by them when it means so blatantly treating someone different for their deficiencies.

But if he wants to do something about it, something to ensure that name is never used again, or otherwise if he can provide a logical basis, then Rio doesn't mind that. ]

[commences]

You're only here to watch after those two, aren't you?

( that's what he said at the start, he didn't even want to play a game with komaeda, and it seems to have ended with the comment about what should be done to fix the little issue. he'll redirect everything away from him because he's hated that anyway, topics that linger too long on his likes and dislikes. )

Return to doing that.

( he doesn't sound upset, but he certainly is ignoring it all just so he can move on. there's nothing to do be done, if he has to be honest, he didn't need an answer to the question. it does nothing knowing rio likes red and blues, those vibrant colors where people can like pastels. )

Because you can't if you're too busy looking in the direction that has my eye.

( he can understand it, it's not like he's accustomed to being polite when it comes to people's names, or what makes them close, along with other things. being online for three years, and they couldn't integrate that into his code.

komaeda blinks, humming slightly confused, it's nothing serious, but there's a smile that appears on his face. practiced, delighted, and content with what's going on, that's the only emotion he knows to retreat to when something doesn't go right, he's been through worse, and he understands the intentions of what he can do in order to have it go his way. placing such power in komaeda's hands, but he doesn't need it.

the conversation already ended, the game ended, so he's fine where it's leaving off. )

Goodnight.

[rearranger]

[ Who can really say what he's feeling behind the expression card? No one, not Nagito Komaeda nor Tia Safalin unless he so wills it, as even those faint shifts in expression are all to easy to repress with just the slightest effort. It's a consequence of being designed to be such a stoic creature, whether that was originally intended or otherwise, and nurtured for so long in a place where even the slightest hint of weakness was as good as a death sentence. One can pick up on the little tics, the little microexpressions and tones that match to cards, but in the end that was at his whims and desires.

But there's a flicker of something that he doesn't mean to show. It's the way his eyes widen just briefly, the way he leans just a little bit forward, the flicker of emotion in that impassive gaze that's there and gone in seconds. It's the way that no response comes except for a slight sound, barely audible, because everything else is choked out, and in all those little things that none would care to notice. It's accompanied by a cloyingly sweet nostalgia.

He should return to what he came here for. But it's too much for an AI that has only existed for just three years, for a human who has only existed for just a short ten days, what can he do aside from stare? If Safalin were here, if Gashu or Miely or even Hiyori were here, he would be reminded of what was important, he would be shoved along, and these situations would be handled gracefully. But they're not here, there's just ASUNARO's failed creation, there's just Rio Ranger, there's just a doll, and the most he can do is afford Komaeda the courtesy to walk away first so he doesn't have to see him exit.

Bitter, rotten, disgusting, but he accepts this conclusion with the same confused uncertainty as all others. He only need do the courtesy of waiting, burning every last second into his memory, before retreating when there's no one to notice and no pain to be had and no weakness to be seen. ]