[it's a strange question, strange reaction he almost starts at before hinata moves on, casual and giving a good excuse for momentary leave; subaru tilts his head a moment before he nods, sticking his hands in his pockets and playing with the rounded quartz there as he intends to follow the other where he should go -- outside the dorms or just outside the door, it doesn't matter, as long as he can stop feeling the varying gazes burning against his skin.
he's always been aware of other people's eyes. it's a blessing and a curse, and right now it's somewhat suffocating. subaru gives a reassuring smile to anyone concerned, because it's hina-chan? there's nothing to worry about, he'll be fine.
... ... ...
once they're away, the smile drops into something more subdued, eyes unable to stay on hinata and focusing on the snow-patched ground of february. subaru shifts on his feet, looking out at the school and breathing out the white smoke that comes from the cold, as if just taking a drag from a much needed cigarette. he can't have them as an idol, but he's thought of it before -- it's hard not to, when one of his teachers does it every so often.]
Natsume and I have been friends for three years, [he starts out,] but that's just a small part for why I trust him.
[...]
The reason he wouldn't do this to me is 'cause I've already dealt with it twice before -- it's not that long of a story, but it's kinda hard to talk about 'cause... no one here knows, Hina-chan. For the first time in my life, my name really doesn't matter.
[it's nice. people like hanging out with him for him. there's no first impressions marred or overly glamorized by being the son of akehoshi, or being subaru akehoshi of trickstar, he feels like a normal high school boy and as weird as it was at first -- it's without a doubt an experience he finds a breath of fresh air, though it wasn't like he was suffocating badly home. expectations are something he lives to exceed, and he thrives beneath the spotlight...
... but he can't exactly deny that this isn't nice, too. years of school lost to a tremendous tragedy now regained. yumenosaki is precious to him and he loved every bit of what happened there, but yogen's gained a space in his heart too.]
no subject
he's always been aware of other people's eyes. it's a blessing and a curse, and right now it's somewhat suffocating. subaru gives a reassuring smile to anyone concerned, because it's hina-chan? there's nothing to worry about, he'll be fine.
... ... ...
once they're away, the smile drops into something more subdued, eyes unable to stay on hinata and focusing on the snow-patched ground of february. subaru shifts on his feet, looking out at the school and breathing out the white smoke that comes from the cold, as if just taking a drag from a much needed cigarette. he can't have them as an idol, but he's thought of it before -- it's hard not to, when one of his teachers does it every so often.]
Natsume and I have been friends for three years, [he starts out,] but that's just a small part for why I trust him.
[...]
The reason he wouldn't do this to me is 'cause I've already dealt with it twice before -- it's not that long of a story, but it's kinda hard to talk about 'cause... no one here knows, Hina-chan. For the first time in my life, my name really doesn't matter.
[it's nice. people like hanging out with him for him. there's no first impressions marred or overly glamorized by being the son of akehoshi, or being subaru akehoshi of trickstar, he feels like a normal high school boy and as weird as it was at first -- it's without a doubt an experience he finds a breath of fresh air, though it wasn't like he was suffocating badly home. expectations are something he lives to exceed, and he thrives beneath the spotlight...
... but he can't exactly deny that this isn't nice, too. years of school lost to a tremendous tragedy now regained. yumenosaki is precious to him and he loved every bit of what happened there, but yogen's gained a space in his heart too.]
I hope that doesn't change.