yogen | six reconnections ➱ open feb catch-all;

Entry tags:

kokoro connect: himeko inaba

six reconnections ➱ open feb catch-all;

Who: Himeko Inaba and YOU.
What: Catch-all log for February
When: Throughout February.
Where: Various locations as listed.
Warnings: None for now, but will be updated as necessary.

↳ option one. ( during the disney trip, but not at disney )

[Perhaps you're one of the plucky ones that decided to say no to Disney, like Inaba and find yourselves rather bored--and well, given that everything is basically self-study now and Inaba is, well, not exactly hurting in terms of her studies, as she was a naturally good test taker. And on top of that, she was actually decent at math, so it's actually rather...

Well - it certainly doesn't push all her worries, but it definitely allows her to relax a bit, knowing that having an emptier school meant all the nuisances were gone, albeit temporarily.

Which also meant that she could do as she pleased. Hence for those who might still be around, they might notice her in various places, but especially on the second floor - particularly in the cooking room and workshop.

What she can be found doing in the cooking room is well, trying to teach herself how to cook a little better--it's something that she had been doing before, back home and is something that she wants to carry over here. Even more so since it's actually a matter of survival.

Probably doesn't help that she's not all that great of a chef and finds it rather frustrating to do so...]

[But she can't rely on others to cook for her in the first place!! What if someone decides to take advantage of that...! Well, at the very least, she isn't blowing up the kitchen and is instead just frustratedly staring at her cooking notes. It's probably fine.]

↳ option two. ( feb 12th )

[So. How about that tuition, huh?

Inaba, someone who looks at the PDA when she has the time to, even if she doesn't reply to everyone's antics, given the way she is.

But then that ping goes off and well...

...time for her to investigate the matter! People might notice her snooping around places where faculty may be while trying to be natural about it; not to mention that she's polite about it and all. But it's odd that she's trying to be so proactive and trying to actually talk to people, isn't it?

Hm.]

↳ option three. ( valentine's day )

[Otherwise known as "the worst day in Inaba Himeko's existence".

She's awfully aware of what day today is and while she's already naturally distant to most people, today is a day where she's... well, not in the best state. In fact anyone who is a third year, or teaches third years will probably notice that she's looking a lot more lethargic, and not in a 'she hasn't slept' way but she also has bags under her eyes showing that she hasn't slept much lately.

People who are observant will definitely notice that she's fiddling with her pendant idly, sighing heavily every now and again to the point where it's honestly just kind of sad.

After classes, she actively avoids people, wanting to find a room without people--or well. At best a place that she can keep herself distracted.

Which is why she chooses the library, stockpiling on a lot of random books. But none of them are romantic in nature. It's fine.]

↳ option four. ( wildcard )

[I wrote this all at 3AM, come @ me with anything else you want to do with Inaba, I'm down for a lot. She isn't going to Disney, but if anybody wanted to attempt to convince her prior to it, feel free to make An Attempt at least. Feel free to hmu at

tsundereban or on the Discord to plot something out!!]

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. . .why?

[It comes off a little flatly, but there's sincerity to her single worded question; as if what he said wasn't enough for her.

Well, that, and she's just now more confused.

Not a friend but an ally??? For what reason???]

Two reasons.

[ Which're coming off the top of his head, naturally. ]

The first is a selfish reason. I genuinely think that having someone like you around is good for the rest of us. Your analysis of what's been going on with the Arisus and ability to pick up on certain details has been stellar. Losing that, we'd be more screwed than we typically are.

[ Leaving him, as a student council representative, as someone who'd want to remain on her side. There are so many around who want to cause chaos or be vague, and having Inaba here to be more straightforward could only be a good thing. ]

The second...

[ Hm. How does he phrase this? ]

You remind me of somebody. Someone who wasn't interested in having any kind of friend or even interested in acknowledging anyone else around her. There's no deeper meaning behind it, but when I hear you speak about being alone and your need to keep everyone further than arm's length away...

I can't help but think that I'd be betraying them by leaving you by yourself.

To be honest, if I knew them a little better it'd be easier for me to get a handle around what sorts of actions would have been taken... besides, it's easy to think of multiple, endless possibilities and what ifs if you've thought long and hard enough.

Seeing scenarios like that isn't difficult at all.

[It's a staple for all of her life, so why not more of her afterlife?]

I'd say there are some who are on par or even better than I am, but one of them is a nuisance that I hate with every fiber of my being, so I am not even going to talk about them, because they're a pain in the ass.

[...

She sighs. And then speaks up, again. But there's something to her voice that's heavier.

Like this is something that's been on her mind for a while.]

It's not as if I want to be this way. But after having all the constant murders being done by 'transfer students', constantly, it's... safer, to distance yourself. You can't get hurt, or betrayed.

Well, it probably doesn't help that some people know something about the last time I died here in this place and hasn't been telling me anything about it. That's my own problem, though.

--I feel like I know exactly who you're talking about.

[ "Coming back from whatever dead place you floated in". That's what he had said, wasn't it? Ugh, he was furious enough to miss it, but he remembered something that that guy had said that unnerved him. Other than-- well, all of the insults. ]

I don't think I'm necessarily strong enough to hurt someone and not feel shitty about it later, so you can take that for what you will. But, I won't lie to you and say that way of thinking isn't valid. Opening up to someone superficially only leaves you open to be hurt. It exposes your weaknesses far, far too easily.

[ His weakness is far the hell away from here, so he'll take that. ]

...you know. There's someone I think I need to have a chat with about anyone that's died recently. [ A beat. ] Rather, people that've died and then come back.

It's pretty obvious, isn't it.

[She answers him dryly with a bit of a sigh.

Well, Inaba's good at covering up a good portion of her weaknesses with proverbial duct tape, so she's glad for that. Taichi's not here too, so it's not as if that can be used against her.

But someone that's died and come back--]

... Hm? With who, exactly?

[There's a very, very keen interest in her voice at that as her gaze shifts from him to the wrist with the tallies for a brief moment, thoughtful.]

Someone I think may be a little more straightforward, with the faintest amount of pressure added. I mean, I wouldn't press her too hard on the topic, but I feel like she'd know.

[ The only other person that's been consistently good to him, and has been here as long as anyone else. ]

I don't think I've gotten the full story from Nene Yashiro just yet.

[ Which, as he says it, he feels nervous about it. Mostly because... he really, really doesn't want to stress her out any more than she already is. ]

Nene?

[That's an interesting name to pop up. Now she's more interested.]

Did she... tell you something else before? You said 'full story', but I assume she said something, right? I mean, I do remember that she told me that when I came back, that after whatever happened...

...I'm supposing 'death', or whatever, that I was reanimated with three others for the student council elections. Maybe you were one of those 'three others'? So actually the person you might want to be talking to is someone else entirely. Although I can't say for sure that they'd know about who did it.

[ --Ah.

Actually, that. That would explain. A lot. ]

Yashiro mostly gave me the run down of what had been going on, but I hadn't asked about myself. I didn't know if it was important or not.

[ A brief pause. ]

Arisu-- Maya, had asked how I would have done in the student council elections after I had expressed interest in joining again. I was fully intending on participating, but I don't remember anything between thinking that and waking up during the cultural festival.

...if that's the case, then I want to know definitively. All this talk of possession, I sure as hell don't like the idea of anyone taking over my body.

Why wouldn't what happened to yourself be unimportant?

[There's a questioning look in her gaze--but there's something more to it, something rare: concern. It's not something that she gives often, and to a lot of people, if any.]

Honestly, maybe you were better off not participating if it was really a bloodbath like I've heard.

[...]

I do want to know, too. I-- [And for a moment, she's vulnerable. Her voice shakes. Her fingers curl into a tight fist, nails digging into the skin.] I hate the idea that someone used my body like that.

Whether or not it was just me having blacked out for an extended period of time or anything else, in the long run... I came back. It must have not been that important.

[ After all, he wasn't missing a limb and hadn't become an evil puppet or anything as far as he knows. When he regained consciousness, it was as if nothing had ever happened. Despite that, her concern's absolutely noted. Here she is asking why no one should care about her, while she's showing him a bit of sympathy. ]

--? I agree and everything, but--

[ Something about how she's speaking on that's bugging him. ]

--Nobody here thinks that was actually the real you, if someone was controlling you. In fact, it could've been a doppelganger or something like that. Some kind of puppet.

[ Again, trying to explain this away as if it'll make him feel better, but also... he's not too sure about it. It feels like he wandered onto a mine field just by bringing that up. ]

[Oh boy.

This isn't the conversation that she was expecting to have on this day, but she supposes this is the conversation she might as well be having.

She smiles.

It's not one that reaches her eyes.

When she speaks up yet again, there's something unnatural about her speech; it's soft and cracked, like someone playing a note slightly off-key.]

I know that. But, still... I don't like it.

[There's something vulnerable in the way she talks about this, with her voice too soft.]

However, in that case, given what I heard that happened...

[She shuts her eyes, thoughtful for a second.

Of course, she knows that maybe she's been overthinking things this whole time. But there are still so many questions that are left unanswered.]

Whether it's a doppelganger, or possession, or even a puppet. There's no denying the fact that I was just gone for several months. Or rather --

[A pause, as she tries to collect herself. Her thoughts. She opens her eyes again, wearing that same smile. It's a sad, lonely one.]

Who's to say that the 'current us' aren't the doppelgangers with false memories of the person that died all that time ago?

[ --He hadn't considered that angle, but he also generally didn't want to believe that he could be anything but who he was. It was clear that Inaba had put thought into this theory, to the point that she... sounds like she's unhappy at the very thought.

Granted. There's the part of him that thinks, who in their right mind would want to take his memories? He's got too many flaws, too little money, copious amounts of unhappy thoughts and memories behind him. Surely, if you had the capabilities, you would remove everything. Give them nothing but happy memories, false or not. It felt like an attempt was made, but...

...no, it didn't sit well with him. ]

Whoever's mixing souls and memories around, they could do a lot better than me. Even if it was as a joke, or for fun. But even without that thought in my head...

[ ...he plants his palm flat against his heart. ]

Whatever I feel for my family, my friends, for Shinomiya-- maybe it's too idealistic or naive, but this feeling can't be faked by anybody. Until that fades away, I don't truly believe 'Shirogane Miyuki' is dead and gone for good.

[Inaba seesaws from side to side on her heels.

As someone who's dealt with a lot of things regarding the soul, regarding memories... she can't tell. If she's real or not. If these memories of hers are of somebody else's, or are fabricated from the start.

There isn't anybody here that knows the real Inaba Himeko.

So there's nobody that can truly confirm her existence.

That's what she thought.

She sighs.]

I see. I suppose in a way... you're lucky, for being able to think that way.

[It's so bright. Something that she's always struggled with, as a dark person.]

[ Miyuki's quiet momentarily, finger tapping against the desk. It's true that he'll probably never know the real Inaba Himeko.

Although, that begs a question. ]

Inaba. When you think about the person who gave you that pendant... what do you feel?

[ Why the hell are you in the library? ]

...!

[Surprise flits into her expression at that question.]

You can't just ask a girl that sort of question!

[ Aha, how the turn tables. ]

Why not? It's a fairly straightforward question. I imagine it wouldn't be that tough if you didn't harbor something for whoever it was.

[ Just an insinuation, especially from the reaction. ]

[Inaba clicks her tongue a little bit, rubbing at the nape of her neck as her cheeks flush, glancing away for a moment.]

It's not that it's tough, it's more... embarrassing to think about... and talk about.

I see. Well, I'll leave that alone, then.

[ Time to back away from that, just in case. ]

But think about it. You already look plenty embarrassed to me. I don't think you'd be wired to feel that hesitant to talk about it. What would a fake "Inaba Himeko" care?

...

[She lets a breath in, and then out, trying to push the fluster out of her face.]

I don't know. To be honest, I can't be sure. There's no proof of it at all--not here, not anywhere. And because it doesn't exist, there isn't anything I can say that would conclusively ground me.

After all--

[And here, she smiles.]

Who's to say that these feelings were placed in the 'current me' so that it'd hurt more? Maybe someone would want to observe that sort of thing... ha.

[ Truthfully, he can't help but feel bad. Really, just like the investigation... he doesn't have enough to say anything definitively.

He's completely convinced he's the true Shirogane Miyuki, former student council president of Shuchiin Academy, top of his class. The only one who can feasibly, with enough work, cause Shinomiya Kaguya to confess to him.

But proving that to someone convinced of the opposite... well. ]

If that's the case, then the best option's to track down whoever's responsible and get to the bottom of this.

We'll figure out if those feelings you're holding onto are real or not.

[ For Inaba's own sake. So she can breathe comfortably for once. ]

Was already planning on doing that. It's on the list--amongst a lot of other things.

Even if they're not real, though, that doesn't change the fact that I have them. And it doesn't change that I won't see him again, either.

[ Aaaand there it is. Kind of expected, but. ]

Then instead, use that feeling. Keep yourself you as long as you possibly can. Even if you don't see him--

[ He's making a lot of presumptions, so he immediately figures it's time to reel himself back in. ]

Well, if you don't see him or any of your loved ones, you can still hold onto what you have. Right now... it's not bad to go on as if they're real.

...

[For a moment, she's quiet. But it only lasts for a second, maybe two.]

You really are a kind person, you know.

[ --He just sighs and shakes his head. ]

Kind or not, I just don't want to see you lose any kind of hope. That's what fr-- er, allies do.

[ Well, anyway. He'll be holding onto Orient Express as he stands up. ]

I'd better get going. Crime solving training or not, I do still have school work to finish up.

[Don't think she didn't catch that misspoken word.

She will remember this.]

Yeah, yeah. Don't overdo it, though.

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