yogen | MISSION 2.B

[ The paper is brittle, dry from the heat and easy to tear and much of it already has. On it are a list of names, copypasted here for my benefit as much as anybody else's:

~~▓▓▓▓▓uki Shirogane~~
Ki▓▓▓ka Ish▓▓▓▓▓
~~▓▓baru Akeh▓▓▓~~
▓▓ede Akamat▓▓
▓na Adams
▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓akugou
▓▓▓▓▓▓urusu
▓dd
Ste▓▓▓▓▓ell

The dark spots blotted out with blood or burned through with fire can't be helped, but the names that are scratched out... XXbaru AkehXXXX, XXXXXXXurusu, Xdd... They can speculate all they want, but this list of names isn't going to help them escape, nor does it look like the necklace— whether they decide to take it or leave it be is up to them.

Akira is right, though: this is a poor safe room, with the fire not burning them now but soon the very real one will catch up to them and the further up they run, the less ways there are to escape. ]

( the necklace... it catches her eye immediately, and as shuichi does his thing with the gorinto, and akira mentions the paper, and kokichi presumably shows it to them, she just stares at it, transfixed. finally? the third piece? jekyll had left her the other two when he died...

without much thought, she wraps her sleeve around her hand, just to be safe, and grabs the necklace, bringing it close to her face. )

Wonder what'll happen when I put all three together... ( Very Inchresting ) ... anyway, what's with the gorintos and the paper? Any hints there?

[ Shuichi looks pale as he casts his gaze over the paper, fingers slightly shaky when he holds it for himself. He can recognize... every single one of these names, and that worries him. Why are only some of them striked out? The strikes don't correspond necessarily with the people who disappeared before or are still here, either... He hands it back to Akira as Rika asks, and then shakes his head. ]

There's no doubt that this paper is relevant somehow... I think we should hold on to it. But... I don't think it's related to these gorintos, or the necklace.

[ So Akira can take it back since it was his, or Kokichi can snipe it again, but anyway Shuichi turns towards the window. ]

Sorry, Kurusu-kun, but can you try the door? I'll take the window.

[ Whatever Rika does with the necklace is up to her, but they do need to get out of the building somehow. He maneuvers around the gorintos with care, trying not to topple them in his attempts, but he's going to try to see if the window opens. And in the process, also look through it for any hints of what's happening outside. ]

[ The necklaces will fit perfectly beside one another despite the dents and dings some of them sport, but they fall apart just as easily, no internal magnet or anything of the sort to keep them together.

Shuichi tries to open the window, and while it rattles with his effort, the latch does not move to let the window slide open. When he looks outside, he can see the area past the courtyard: dry grass just down below, what looks like a pond to the left, and past that where the dorms stand, half a building that's in splinters as if bulldozed to the ground. There is not a soul to be seen outside, but with the pounding he'd be able to feel if he presses his hand against the window, it isn't for the lack of trying.

Akira will find that the door opens easily, and that it's easier to breathe— the door at the top of the stairs that lead to the rooftop has been left slightly ajar, and there is less smoke up here. The smell of alcohol continues to linger. ]

[ He'll nod when given back the paper, only fold it once before carefully tucking the delicate scrap away, and wastes no time in following the suggestion and going for the door. There's brief hesitance with one hand laid upon it, then resting on the handle, testing for heat again... but when it seems safe he's pushing it open and stepping onto the first rung. A short breath heaves from his chest - he almost thinks he could taste fresh air, freedom, if it wasn't for the alcohol.

(Not him hoping they can scale the building to escape; bets Rika would love it, he already promised to carry Kokichi down ~~no, he probably can't actually do that~~, and... thinks it would be sure fun to watch Shuichi try it. ) ]

... This way's clear. We can get outside.

[ That strong smell is worrying, but at least the fire doesn't seem to be here and they don't have better options. Akira only pokes his head back once to gesture towards the group with his free hand before taking it upon himself to go first. He'll move up the stairs, hunched at the shoulders in a slight crouch when he gets to the top, and very slowly push the door to the roof open. ]

[ scale the building with WHAT their bare hands and feet, I hope so, I want to see this

It might end up being that way anyways, because when Akira pushes the door to the rooftop open, he's met with an open sky, tainted smoggy brown with smoke with a bright red disk of a sun hanging right over his head. The rooftop is largely empty, no desks or chairs or lunchtime litter to suggest it's a very popular hangout spot, and as with the rooftop they've been able to see from the clocktower, the rooftop here and now also does not have any fencing around the perimeter.

But before they think they've been chasing ghosts, they can spot a lone figure towards the left side of the rooftop, a student in a black hoodie standing with their heels on the edge and toes over it, head bowed and staring down at the courtyard below. ]

[ not the bare-handed scaling... every time something this comes up i just think about this, it haunts me

There's... someone out there. He can see them through the door Akira's opened, while he's still half-inside, in the process of following once the window had given him no hints. He'd thought about trying to break it if they had to, since it seemed to at least rattle from his efforts, but... the only things they could try that with are the rocks from the gorintos, and Shuichi would rather not disturb those like that. So the door is preferable -- and much more certain to get them out, considering it opened. ]

...I'll go. If it's dangerous, it would help if we had someone... ah, more athletic stay as backup.

[ Hidden for the surprise element he means, and he looks away in embarrassment as he mumbles the word 'athletic' because we all know he means he's a useless twink who'd be bad in a fight. Either way, saying that, Shuichi walks past Akira with careful steps. Before he knows it... an image flashes through his mind, of a person perched on a branch of the wisteria tree, a rope around their neck -- and himself and Hinata...

He shakes it out of his mind. It's true that the figure's positioning gives off faintly the same impression, but this isn't the time. He approaches them slowly, ready to stop if it seems like him closing in has the risk of sending them into a panic. ]

H-Hello...? Are you... alright?

[ It's a stupid question maybe, but if he says nothing, they might misinterpret the intentions he's approaching with, considering the state of everyone else. ]

[ Shuichi out here with experience

The student's head lifts just slightly at Shuichi's approach, still looking down at the ground but it's clear that he's caught their attention. There is no panic, no surprise at another person up here, and no apparent intention to do much more than stand and prepare themselves. ]

No, I'm not.

[ It's a quiet voice, calm. Not at all worried. ]

Neither are you. What are you all doing in this memory?

Memory... is that what this is?

[ It sounds surreal to be honest; but if there's anything Shuichi's's learned every time, both in his line of work or the killing game, or from the many things he'd thought impossible that happen in this school... it's that you can't just question someone without listening to them. You have to let them tell their story first. ]

...I'm sorry. I'm trying to understand, so... can you tell us a little more? Is this memory... yours?

[ He stops a short distance away, just a mere few steps from the stranger, and glances over his shoulder behind him. Even if it's too early to judge for certain, it seems like it's safe for everyone to follow; and besides, by the way this person phrased things, they might already know he's not alone. ]

It's mine. This is the day of my death. One of the days, anyways...

[ But it will always end the same. Like Aiko pushing Shuichi away when he touched her gorinto and yelled for him to get out of her head, like Chiaki telling him that she is forced to relive her death again and again, this place is no different, albeit a moment stretched into a day. ]

Sometimes, when I'm feeling hopeful, I die down there. Today I felt like going peacefully. You guys want to leave, right? Why don't you join me?

[ There's just a moment of stunned silence... before Shuichi draws in a breath. ]

Ah... wait. I actually think it's too early to decide if I want to leave. Even if all of this was a memory, what kind of person could just... pass through it?

[ Keep your eyes open. He doesn't know if it's related, or even if that's remotely what it meant, but regardless... those are the words that cross through his mind as he chooses. And it's not only that. But after witnessing what they did as they roamed through the building... the thought of just leaving someone alone to relive it without even asking anything is... ]

I don't know why we're here... but I can't just look away, now that we are. I want to at least know more about you.

[ There's a little tilt of the head, almost as if the person meant to turn around but does not. ]

It's a memory... All of this happened in the past, and there's nothing you can do to change it. If the memory ends with you all still here, I don't know what will happen to you.

[ It's not their memory. They can't even be sure they'll get a second chance when the memory ends— when the person whose memory it is ceases to exist. ]

There's nothing you can do here... Don't waste what time you have.

[ you tell me to shove them off and then shuichi ]

...

[ They don't turn around... but they still meant to, at first. Shuichi doesn't miss that -- and although there are a million other thoughts in his head that mostly all end the same, it's perhaps this small detail he draws his decision from in the end. ]

...You're wrong. It's not a waste of time. And I can prove it based on the things you just told us.

[ His decision, which is to take a single step closer, then hold out his hand. Not to accept what he's offered, but to offer instead -- that if the person takes it, he'll help pull them back from the edge. If even just for what time they still have, because that's all he can do. ]

[ ...

That single step makes them withdraw a little, shoulder hunching and them leaning just a bit further over the ledge— and then rocking back, because for as many times as this has happened, it never gets easier, it won't ever get easier.

With their back still turned, they can't see Shuichi's hand, but they can feel the sentiment in that quiet voice. ]

...How would you prove it?

[ by shoving... ]

Sometimes... when I'm feeling hopeful, I die down there. A moment ago... that's what you told us.

[ It's not an exact reproduction, because this is Shuichi saying it and not them, and he isn't-- he can't be as calm as they sounded. Even if he'd wanted them not to, emotion and hesitation still filter their way through his words. But only through the quote -- the things he himself has to say... oddly enough, sound secure.

Just like the hand that he leaves outstretched, for as long as it takes. ]

Maybe... it's just like you said, and if this is a memory, we won't be able to change how it ends. It's not exactly like there's a precedent we can draw from...

[ The situation of being in someone's memory, in a physical sense, is unrealistic to think of in the first place. It's something that shouldn't be possible, that only happens in books or movies... or maybe manga sounds closer. How can they know what could happen? It's just that... that's not the point. ]

But... you'll remember it, won't you? [ whether they coldly just left them to die on their own after seeing all this, or ] ...I can't just leave, knowing that.

...I'll remember it.

[ All the deaths, from the hopeful ones where they're down there fighting tooth and nail for the possibility of escape, from the hopeless ones where they're standing up here, waiting for the sun to go down so they can enjoy what peace they can get before they go quietly. ]

I remember seeing others before, new faces in the flames. For better or for worse, they don't come back.

[ It's a coin flip between dying and escaping, and maybe it's both. They don't know. They don't know anything of what happens past this day. ]

I don't know what to do to ensure you live to see tomorrow.

But... that in itself is odd, don't you think? If this were really just a memory, then why would the people in it keep changing...?

[ Another step closer, more taken by reflex this time. He joins them in looking at the courtyard below, not technically empty because of the pond and the demolished building... come to think of it, is the wisteria tree still in place? As he remembers that for some reason, Shuichi can't help but check.

But only for a second, before he lowers his gaze to his hand, still outstretched. And he still doesn't take it back. It's a little... embarrassing to be holding it for so long, though. ]

Besides... it's not like that changes the fact you'll remember. You won't forget about what's happening right now... and you can say what you want, but I can't just let someone who worried about me out of kindness be alone.

[ Because there isn't any doubt about it -- whoever the hooded student might be, they're kind. Anyone could have stopped caring after being through all of this; in fact, it might be easier... they've been repeating this, right? This nightmare scene... over and over... and yet they still find it within their heart to want to save total strangers.

Maybe he can't change how it ends. But he can take their hand and not give up on them, and that can stay in their memory. ]

[ The wisteria tree remains at the center of the courtyard, but much smaller than Shuichi would remember, its branches not yet spread from wing to wing and appears to be budding rather than in its perpetual full bloom. ]

...You have no intention of joining me in death. The fact that you all made your way up here tells me that much.

[ It's a nice sentiment, not being alone in their final moments. But there is no way this comfort can be possible when the final fate for everybody here is death— and no pretty one, at that. So, if Shuichi does not mean to jump with them, then...

...

It's a slow turn around, but one without concern for the height nor wobble in their step, as if they've done so hundreds of thousands of times already, just before staring up at the sky and feeling the wind of their back. But this time, the warm brown eyes turn to stare over at Shuichi, to that hand that must be shaking by now but is still stubbornly offered, how long has he been trying to reach out? ... They take his hand, cold with the faintest of tremors, and and lowers their gripped hands for reprieve. ]

Are you sure you want to be here with me? The rest will not be easy to watch, and there is nowhere else to go.

[ Their hand feels cold, from the wind and no doubt from whatever must have been going through their mind as they waited in solitude. Shuichi's is warm, with the fading reminder of the fire they ran from inside the school still imprinted, and ash in his hair, and... the bloodstain on his shirt. He forgot about that. As he rubs the sore muscles in his arm with his other hand, he can't help but think with the tired notes of an awkward fluster, maybe it's for the better they weren't facing him from the start.

There's a pause where he finally sees their face... like he's trying to pull from his memory, but that doesn't stop him from nodding. ]

...Right. I'm sure.

[ Rika will hate it, though. Maybe already hates it and is about to kill him, who knows. But he's not letting go. Not when he knows -- perhaps not as directly, but thoughts about sleeping... forgetting... letting everything find an end on its own. ]

If I'd been by myself... I honestly doubt I'd have made it either. There was just always someone stronger beside me.

[ Even now, there still is. Shuichi looks back at the rest of his friends as he says it, the same sheepish note from his voice on his face. ]

[ Bravo, Shuichi - the face that greets him when he glances back seems to say. Akira can't help but be impressed, here he was standing back just enough not to spook the target but close enough to be the 'athletic support'... but Shuichi didn't need that in the end, did he? It's nothing but confidence, a faint yet warm smile Akira sports when he finally takes the stage to join them. Not shy to hop next to the person they've found on the ledge, choosing their opposite side to where Shuichi is - stepping up so his toes peek over the drop. ]

Something's already changed anyway, right? You asked us what we're doing here. [ He gives a glance towards them; fearlessness or recklessness... who knows what's on his face, but even faced with such a grim prediction it doesn't seem to shake him. ] It's to find the end of this - together. No matter what that end is, I'd rather go kicking and shouting until the very end - until we can change it. I still want to go together.

[ With Shuichi. Rika. Kokichi. Now them. You can't tell him they haven't joined the party now, too. And no matter what that person says, no matter how hopeless it sounds, this isn't nearly enough to make Akira give up; when he turns his eyes back to the world below them, it's clear he's still searching for answers. Anywhere they can go from here. A ledge, a maintenance ladder, another part of the rooftop; hell, is there fencing he can kick down to use as a bridge to anywhere? He's ~~stupid~~ brave enough to try just about anything.

They've got to still have options. ]

What happens after this?

[ Maybe that's where they need to start from - what they're expecting, so they can put their minds together to find a way to change that. ]

[ me looking at the calendar except friendship route happened ]

After this? Something... I've never been able to watch until the end.

[ Shuichi looks back at his friends and his friends... they can hear noise from down the hall, things crackling and crashing, people crying and moaning, the smell of burnt flesh, the smell of alcohol that continues to linger outside despite being in relatively fresh open air.

The student finally steps away from the ledge, keeping a hold on Shuichi's hand and leads him over towards the structure covering the stairs (the this thing, whatever this is called) and waving for the other three to get on top of it before the other students start pushing their way up the stairs and out the door. The sight doesn't get easier from when they saw the state of these students from the ground floor, skin charred and peeling, flesh underneath raw and bleeding, the way they fight each other to fit through that little opening of a doorway in their bid for freedom, piling on each other, grabbing each other, snapping bones and breaking noses just to get outside— and for what? A breath of fresh air, a fenceless space, bodies stepping off the edge and falling one by one by one.

All this time, the desperation to escape leaving so much death in their wake, it was only to run towards death themselves. There is no helping them. There is no saving them. There is no ledge, no ladders, no way around the clocktower separating the other half of the rooftop. Nothing but the sheer drop forty feet to the ground.

And, after the five of them left on the rooftop finish watching the scene, what option is there but to join the others?

Day in and day out, it's this sort of memory that replays. ]

[ i'd apologize for friendship route but i don't feel sorry

They climb atop the structure that houses the stairwell (which apparently is called a bulkhead in architectural terms.... the more you know, I'd never have guessed), and even if they need to pause for a while to make it, Shuichi has no intention of staying separate either. He'll take the student's hand again without protest, squeezing it softly through the rest of the nightmare scenes that unfold. It's... difficult to watch -- so he understands that answer, in a way, frustration building up in the back of his chest as he bites at his lip not to cry.

Is there really nothing they can do for these students...? This goes far beyond themselves. It isn't fair. He doubts that any of these people he has to watch as they head to the edge is responsible for what happened... for the state that they're in, for the fact that they have to die. ]

Ah... um, Goto-san...?

[ It takes him a while to remember, and when he does it's not certain. Sorry, but it's difficult to remember a name that was spoken by Clamor like... maybe once in his presence, at most. (And they were... sort of, a circumstantial witness in Izumi's murder, that helps.) i'm sorry i didn't wanna call them hooded student anymore ]

The roof catches fire eventually, right? That's the logical conclusion... but I do think Kurusu-kun has a point. If we have any time before then... there might still be something we can do.

[ i'm sorry ori i'm trying to cheat the system (again) ]

[ There's some surprise when Shuichi speaks their name, but more in the sense of "Oh, I didn't think you'd remember" than suspicion on why he would. ]

Yeah, the roof catches on fire, and everyone— everything inside burns except for the frame and the outer walls. It comes up here and... I jump. Because I'd rather die on my own volition than be backed into a corner and burned alive.

[ They've never seen the end. Even this much, seeing former classmates fling themselves into the abyss, is further than they'd like to see. The prospect of being all alone, the prospect of having no other choice.

The flames burning on the fourth floor after they passed through it, sealing off any chance of turning back. ]

[ Yeah... it's probably faster that way. Before Shuichi can stifle that thought, for a second, it's there -- that he can't blame them. ]

The frame and the outer walls...

[ Outer walls... ]

Then... is there something that keeps the fire contained?

[ Maybe the same thing that kept them in? But people can jump from the rooftop... right? So it has to be on the lower floors. ]

I don't know. You'd have to ask an architect.

[ Construction worker? The counselor. Either way, they have no idea why the school itself remains standing even after its lower floors are reduced to nothing but a husk, and also no idea what good knowing would do. ]

What are you thinking?

MISSION 2.B

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cw suicide

i said i'd stop tagging this and i'm a liar

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cw burn descriptions, suicide

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1/ cw suicide

2/2 cw suicide