yogen | *lydia beetlejuice voice* Gay Dads,

[He saw that jump, Clamor, you're not subtle. How charming, honestly, and perhaps Lucifer would fixate more on that and be willing to tease — "Scared you, did I?" — if he weren't gravely serious when he walks into the room and closes the door behind him, coat flowing out at his back as he steps forward.

He takes a seat nearby, perhaps a little too close to Clamor, on top of the desk because there's no way he's cramming himself into one of these tiny desks right now thanks.]

...I need to apologise to you. Before you tell me that I already apologised to you in the woods when we were dealing with the gardener, I know. I haven't forgotten, but to be transparent with you, what I'm about to apologise for is bothering me deeply.

[Lucifer crosses and uncrosses his arms and then crosses them again, unable to decide on a position, waffling over what to say, where oh where has his usual tact gone? Then he shakes his head, brow knitting, and breathes a little sigh. Apologising isn't hard. Wording it, however...]

Due to my actions when we were pulled into the void... [Lucifer takes a second to roll up the sleeve of his shirt, showing off the eighteen tallies scored into the skin — two fresh.] You wound up dying by my hand. I cannot, for the life of me, stop thinking about how foolish and reckless my actions were, and I'm quite glad that your death was undone, though...

...

There's still something nagging at me. Forgive me. I haven't had such strong feelings for someone in a long time. I'm sorry, Clamor.

[His smile wanes at the serious tone, though it's a good thing that Lucifer opens up with the reason why he's apologizing. In the woods... ah, that. Naturally, he does want to interject and say it's not needed, but he couldn't imagine interrupting when Lucifer sounds so serious about it.

Not that he isn't given plenty of opportunities to do so, with how much Lucifer fidgets and struggles to find his words. He'd find that a bit cute (Lucifer has a timid side??), if it weren't for the circumstances... instead, Clamor merely listens, patient and attentive. That's the very least he can do for such an important friend(?), for the one who saved his life as far as he's concerned.]

Lucifer... we still don't know what would've happened if you hadn't acted as you did. Matters may have turned out much worse. What if the tree had taken us in completely? We might not have been brought back at all.

You have nothing to apologize for. We had no way of knowing what would happen, and frankly, I'm still not sure I understand it myself—but you did what you thought would save us. And for that, I can only be grateful. You tried to save my life. How could I be mad at you over that?

Thank you, Lucifer. Really... If you hadn't been there, I don't know if we'd have been able to make it out of there.

[he's just not gonna comment on the part about "strong feelings" right now he's already got a lot on his mind]

[Perhaps not a timid side, but rather a side that finds apologies to be too humiliating — pride is a fatal sin.

Clamor, at least, makes apologising easier in many ways, but that's not the point. They can agree to disagree on this, because in many ways he knows Clamor's right — he did his damn best — but still. Still, when he undid the hex and watched gore leak from Clamor's half-eaten face, it upsets him. He's had people die in his arms before, so this isn't new, but it's also never been his fault. It's never been the result of his ridiculous overconfidence getting in the way of his better judgement.

Lately, he's been in new territory.]

I wouldn't want to subject your imagination to the horrors of what I saw, so I'll spare you the gruesome details. I will say that at first, I had believed wholeheartedly that I'd saved you, but when I woke up with two extra tallies on my wrist, I knew better.

[He rolls his sleeve back down, fixing the buttons on the cuffs with a deft hand before his arms wind up crossed again.]

Regardless of what transpired, I'm glad you're alive now. Is your head alright? I distinctly recall you looking ill after we wound up in the forest and how you seemed to get worse over time.

[Is your killer migraine from losing half of your skull gone, Clamor?]

Oh, that? It went away as soon as we got out of that shadow. [y'know, Kazuki.] I suspect the memory had more to do with it than anything you did... maybe it was a combination of both?

But really, Lucifer, it's fine! It's not like I'm not already dead. [h....as he told Lucifer about all that yet, whatever, it's not a big deal] What matters is that we're both here right now. It's water under the bridge!

[What if it's not fine and Lucifer who thinks of himself as the sole caretaker of all y'all freaks out because it's not fine? Huh? What then?

Surely he's already told Lucifer about the died-once-before thing, but still. As far as Lucifer's concerned, Clamor is alive now, and killable again (clearly), so. Moot point.]

You're alive here and now, aren't you? I think the tally proves that much.

[Lucifer pushes off the desk at that, shifting instead to lean against Clamor's — hope you weren't working on anything there, bud — where he then lets his red eyes linger perhaps a bit too long on Clamor's face, recalling memories he'd rather forget. There's no visible damage, and he looks hale and healthy...

...perhaps he's being a bit thoughtless or impulsive when he reaches to cup Clamor's cheek and run his thumb over his cheekbone, sighing inwardly, concern etched on his face. Concern and love all at once, mingled with contemplation, like he's about to do something stupid and reckless all over again before he speaks.]

All that matters to me in the end is that you're alright, I suppose. I would hope you'd tell me if something was bothering you about the situation, though I'm content to leave that chapter of our lives behind if you are.

[Thank Ishmael he wasn't, because he sure as hell isn't going to be working on anything else now. He's visibly surprised by the approach, and by the hand caressing his face... but he's also not pulling away from it. The tips of his ears flush red, shivering at Lucifer's touch, staring into his eyes as if transfixed...

... staring for a little too long, perhaps, because it's not until after Lucifer stops talking that Clamor realizes he had been.]

O-oh, yes... I mean, of course. [to. whatever the hell he just said, Clamor honestly has no clue, he might still be a fair bit distracted.] And I'm glad you're safe, too! I didn't have the chance to say anything before, but you got cut up pretty badly, didn't you? [like... his head almost got bitten off, but a lot was happening back there and then Amami passed out and Clamor went down with him, so he didn't really get to process how close of a call that was until later.]

[Cute. Lucifer sees that distracted glance, smirking lopsidedly at the shivering and the blushing... There's a flash of something devious in his eyes while he debates seeing just how much it'll take to shut Clamor's brain completely off. He's an overthinker, isn't he? This might be a challenge.

(He could be good, but he won't.)

He's not going to murder the cute moment by telling Clamor that he nearly got a wing ripped off either, were it not for Meng Yao. Still, nearly getting his head chomped on isn't an experience he'd like to repeat.]

Mm... I wouldn't worry much about that. The injuries were superficial at best.

[He's lucky a fang didn't pierce an artery.]

Besides, there are more important things we could be discussing, aren't there? [Then, Lucifer's hand sweeps under Clamor's chin, tilting it up. Hm...] You are a much more interesting topic to me. Do you always blush so easily, Clamor? It's rather endearing.

[oh El this is really not subtle

he laughs, a bit nervously, and that question might as well be rhetorical considering how much more he's blushing now, with Lucifer's hand on his chin... he thinks back to all the transparent flirting they were doing only a few nights before, and let's not forget how he spent most of that mission carried in the demon's arms. yeah... yeah, he'd have to be pretty dense not to read between the lines here.

he wishes he knew like... more than one demon. are all demons like this, or is it just Lucifer?]

... Well. Maybe it's just for you? You do have a certain charm...

[he's not... not interested...]

[Lucifer is, frankly, not a subtle man. ...not all demons are like this, but you know what, some of his brothers might be a little like this. Lucifer's only really like this when he enjoys someone a little too much.

Let him indulge a bit. It's been a rough few months, and now there's an extremely cute man in front of him who he cannot resist. Were they not in a group back during the mission, he might've upped the clingy factor to eleven.]

My charm hardly exceeds yours. You're an intelligent man with a sense of responsibility, and you have the prettiest green eyes I've ever seen. It's difficult to look away from you. It's difficult to not wish to spoil you rotten, too. You'll have to forgive me for being unable to stay away.

[That hand stays under Clamor's chin, eyes carefully scanning his face for a reaction. Has Clamor ever been kissed before? Hm... Would that be too forward of him? He'll save it for the time being. Teasing is more in Lucifer's wheelhouse.]

[He's absolutely indulging him... maybe a little too much, he thinks, as the compliments start piling on. It's not that he's never been praised before, either for his smarts or his appearance, but it's hard to feel like he deserves this much affection when he's hardly done anything new.

He brings his own hand up to Lucifer's, gently touching his wrist but not forcing him to let go. He hesitates, clearly nervous, a hint of anxious longing in his tone.]

You... don't have to stay away. If you don't want to.

[if he wants to. Clamor wouldn't mind it.

he's not even sure what he's asking for, really, to what degree Lucifer wants him. but it's hard to think of a request he'd say no to in this moment. just being wanted, without the usual caveats...]

[Oh by the nine hells, his heart — how does one man have Lucifer so smitten, exactly? He's not the sort of demon to fall for people so easily, and yet.

Yet.]

I won't, then. You have my word.

[It's a promise, subtly whispered perhaps a little too close to Clamor's lips for comfort, shortly before Lucifer backs off slightly. Acknowledging the fingertips on his wrist, though, he doesn't exactly withdraw his hand — some part of him doesn't want to. Another part thinks he should've just sealed the promise with a kiss and gotten it over with, but Lucifer doesn't want to be too pushy at the same time.

He hears that anxiousness. He knows better than to test his luck.]

We ought to spend more time together, don't you think? If only dinner and a movie were applicable here. I may just have to treat you to a private meal over some books instead.

[Winks.]

lydia beetlejuice voice Gay Dads,

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