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[sportadork]

WHO: Sportacus + You
WHAT: November Catch-All
WHEN: novems
WHERE: varied
WARNINGS: TBA

Comments

[sportadork]

[...]

We are thinking of different radishes. Many plants look differently in different parts of the world!

[see everyone can be right]

[adsum]

Hm.

[ The rest of the world is wrong. ]

Well, we'll only be able to use what we have in stock, so no carrots or turnips. Are you good with a knife?

[sportadork]

Well, I've never used one before, but it doesn't look very hard! [please don't give him a knife we will go to the void]

[adsum]

Okay.

[ okokok ]

You're in charge of the spoon! You have to keep stirring the pot so nothing sticks— think you can handle that? It's a suuuuuper important job! The most important one!

[sportadork]

[takes a spoon with all the gravity and solemnity the situation clearly requires.]

I think I can do that! [though honestly he's already spinning it around his fingers like a pen]

[adsum]

[ Their poor soup is going to go flying everywhere, they can see it already.

Sportacus can stir under direct supervision and if Keigo has to place their hand over his and guide him through how to do it, so be it. First, though, is gathering ingredients. Naturally, Sportacus is employed to get things off the high shelves, and the whole cooking process I'm not going to write out is cutting up vegetables and throwing them in stock and isn't so much a recipe as much as it is "I like daikon and lotus root so we're going to put extra daikon and lotus root and no carrots" ]

[sportadork]

[the soup will escape the process unscathed. however, he does no less than four separate and wholly unnecessary acrobatic stunts during the most simple of tasks.]

[adsum]

[ WHY

Keigo probably yelped and waved the knife in their hand at him to stop that, find some kitchen etiquette ]

[sportadork]

[he listens because he is Good, managing to stand still for approximately two minutes before he starts doing wall pushups against the counter.]

[adsum]

[ Oh my god ]

You're just like Subaru.

[sportadork]

Thank you! [he doesn't know if it's an insult or a compliment but he takes everything as a compliment so in the end it doesn't matter.] That must be a very good friend of yours!

[he figures that asking questions using statements doesn't count. utter fae logic.]

[adsum]

[ Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

he's not wrong, though. Subaru's a very good friend and being compared to him is a good thing, for the most part.

... ]

Yeah, he is! Do you know how to play soccer? I think you'd make a good goalie! You'd be able to reach anything!

[sportadork]

I love soccer! But... [waves hand dismissively] I would only play for fun, though. It wouldn't be fair to join a team!

[adsum]

Why not? You can have fun on a team. It's supposed to be more fun than playing by yourself.

[ And if his soccer skills are as amazing as his acrobatic skills, the soccer team will definitely win all their matches. And there is nothing more fun than winning. ]

[sportadork]

It is more fun, but only if it's fair. [shakes head] When I play with the kids, I play on both teams. And no one really cares who wins; it's only for fun.

[but...]

I do play to win if challenged. But, only then. If I really must.

[adsum]

Hmm... it seems less fun to play on both teams— the balance would be difficult to strike, and if you're liable to kick the ball towards either goal with equal probability, nobody's going to want to give you the ball.

[ Also, there is no person that exists who doesn't care about winning.

... ]

I challenge you to join the soccer team and help them win all their matches. You really must. You can't refuse.

[sportadork]

[looking at them expectantly]

[adsum]

[ stares back

they're very good at staring contests ]

[sportadork]

[helpfully] This is the part where you say what the consequence of me not doing that is!

[adsum]

If you don't do it, I'll be mad at you.

[ Which is apparently the absolute last thing anybody would ever want to do ]

[sportadork]

Well, that does sound very serious...

[considers...]

Alright! I will try out for the team. [and then he becomes a teacher and can't play any sports rip]

[adsum]

And you have to make the team! And you have to win!

[ Who says a teacher can't join the team. ]

You'll have lots and lots and lots of fun— like Aniki when he plays! He's going to be your captain, so you'd better listen to everything he says.

[sportadork]

[who says a dog can't play basketball]

I will be sure to listen to him, then! [just gonna assume rokkun's name is aniki forever] That must be another good friend!

[adsum]

[ The smile freezes on their face— almost slips, but they catch themselves and holds it there.

... ]

He's not a friend...

[ ... ]

Aniki's my big brother! He probably won't like you at first, he might, later. If you're good at soccer and help him win!

[sportadork]

Oh! [nodnod] Well, a brother can also be a friend!

[... but, maybe this one isn't. hm.]

I will do my best to leave a good first impression! [frowns] Unless he just dislikes everyone at first. I will still try, but it might not work very well.