npc contact.3

[adsum]

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[sisters]

...

( it takes him longer than it should to answer. it's not that he doesn't know what his answer is, but...

that doesn't mean he likes it. )

I don't. I feel like I've always wanted siblings, but I don't remember ever having any before.

[adsum]

[ It's a start, and all you need to get somewhere is to start. ]

What is it about siblings that you feel you wanted?

[sisters]

( now it's edging into something personal — something amami clearly isn't entirely sold on yet as he spares a reluctant glance back to the counselor. )

I always thought every only child did, honestly. It's kind of lonely growing up all by yourself.

( he thinks... it's half of a whole answer, in any case. )

[adsum]

[ Why is he even here if he doesn't want to talk about personal things ]

Were you so different when you were younger? You don't seem to me to have much trouble getting along with others, and many children find friendships in classmates at school or other children in the neighborhood.

[ Unless Amami's like the counselor's kids who were quarantined off in the middle of nowhere, then maybe he gets a pass. ]

[sisters]

( sometimes you're just bad at counseling. listen, it's hard. )

I guess it wasn't so different. Of course, there were plenty of others I'd talk to, but at the end of the day...

( it was him. his parents cared, he's sure of that much, but he wouldn't say that they were especially present; the maid was kind to him, but she was paid to be; the kids at school were there, but he'd never felt close to any of them in particular. in the end, it always came down to him, wandering off on his own to seek out his next adventure — to find what was missing. )

[adsum]

[ At the end of the day... family is different than friends, he fills in the blank. Maybe that's true; he wouldn't know. ]

Family are people you can be a little more involved with, aren't they? People whose business you can stick your nose into, people you can take care of, people you can be proud of... What do you think?

[sisters]

... Yeah. Yeah, something like that.

( he doesn't like to agree with the counselor here, but listen, he does want to remember that family he had apparently cherished so close to his heart before. for now, his only frame of reference is with kamo-kun — with them, he can't say that such a description is wrong. )

It just felt... like something was missing, y'know? Maybe I did know something was wrong, even if I wasn't sure what it was, but I'd like to think... If I was an older brother, I'd really put my all into that, instead.

( haha )

[adsum]

You do seem the sort: an older brother who would feel something was missing even if he doesn't know why. An older brother who would never ever forget a sibling... but he did. How does that feel?

[ What sort of brother forgets his sibling? How weak does a memory have to be, to be lost like that?

...A good enough brother to feel like something's wrong, when it's easier to pretend nothing is, and face being a disappointment. ]

[sisters]

...

( how does it feel? there's guilt for one thing — a knot tied tight in his stomach, turning with unease the longer he has to linger on a question like this. to forget your younger siblings... he thinks of kamo-kun, of soft mochi cheeks wet with tears and shaking hands, of what they'd most been afraid of at that time — that he'll look at me like i'm a stranger. and here amami is...

he heaves a sigh, none too happy. )

It's not like it was a choice I made. This place... you guys haven't exactly been any kinder with our memories than the last one I was at.

[adsum]

[ Feelings linger, they bleed and stick and hang in the air, and it doesn't matter if Amami sucks at sharing because what matters is putting in the thought, and letting himself feel. The counselor is glad to see him not smile through this one. ]

What would be the point of making you forget?

[sisters]

I'd think I should be the one asking you that...

( there's a sharp edge to his tone, looking pointedly at the counselor... mr. memory thief. )

I don't think there's anything to gain from it, nothing aside from taking something precious from me.

[adsum]

[ ? He's not the only memory thief around here, but he's not about to tell Amami who that is. ]

No, there's a reason. One you may not understand, but there is one. I won't be able to help you get it back until you come to realize what that reason is.

[sisters]

( it's bullshit. at least, it reads to amami that way; he could give them back, if he wanted. he just doesn't want to. )

So this is your definition of "counseling", huh? You take our memories from us and then make us earn them back?

( he's frustrated now — impatience dripping into his voice even as he makes an attempt at keeping it even. )

Not sure how I'm supposed to figure out your "reason" without even knowing what the memories are.

[adsum]

[ haha, yeah ]

You'll figure it out because you're nosy and stubborn and despite all that you are, I have faith in you. You say you don't know what those memories are, but you came here with suspicions, haven't you? There are people out there who remind you, move something within you. You're not alone in figuring it out. You can reach the answer through your own merit, without asking me to hand it over.

[sisters]

( a lot of faith to have in a guy who gives up as easily as amami does.

useless.

him, the counselor, all of it. pocketing his hands, amami starts slowly making his way back to the door. )

If you're not gonna help, then I guess I don't have much of a choice, do I?

( he heaves a sigh. )

In that case, I'll be off.

[adsum]

Goodbye.

[sisters]

( slams door. )