antitoxin: (pic♯15453909)
sou hiyori. ([personal profile] antitoxin) wrote in [community profile] yogen2022-02-15 03:56 am

spoiler for love: “break-up”-ish, spoiler for life: “death”-ish.

Who: Midori & victims
What: Despairzone 2022
When: Valentine's day onwards
Where: Yogen high school (maybe?)
Warnings: TBE
rearranger: (pic♯15443197)

okay true he is being very helpful today

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-03 12:47 am (UTC)(link)
[ Ranger moves to pluck the packet from his hand and pour it in himself. The little bit is already too much, and he stirs it with just a few steady turns of the spoon. ]

You'll do the opposite.

[ It's true enough that once one becomes aware of the thoughts of others, they can use that to their advantage. The name of the game is to notice the other person before they notice you, and to use what you've found to gain an advantage. Ranger has done that from the start, and his knowledge of those around him has only grown. There's a downward twitch of the lips that might pass as a frown as he searches for the error in his calculations and comes up blank.

Careful observation. Logical assessments. Running through each and every option before forming a conclusion. In the long term, that should have been correct, and even now he's rolling over what had transpired in his mind to try and make sense of it. It won't do to let himself grow stupid from fear, and he's not satisfied with this result. But for as much data as he's collected, he finds no evidence that he wouldn't be betrayed. There's nothing that can affirm that every action wasn't with some end goal in mind. If it were him, he would handle it that way.

A couple more switches, and he taps the spoon against the mug. He can find no evidence that he won't be treated the same upon being found inconvenient. ]


You should learn how to make coffee properly.

[ Either that or it's just cheap coffee. ]
rearranger: (pic♯15488483)

no see he's helping right now, ranger wants to go bond with someone

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-03 01:59 am (UTC)(link)
That's why I said properly.

[ It's shit coffee, and Ranger has expensive tastes, but he thinks that he could pay for a better blend. He takes another sip before letting the cup rest in his lap. If it's to ease his nerves, he thinks that finding Komaeda might be a good idea. He's easy to talk to, and his judgment is sound. There would be no need to worry about intentions and accuracy.

He casts a glance at the door. He's reported as he should, and Midori has been given the opportunity to correct the misunderstandings that had been in place, so it wouldn't be out of line for him to leave now when they can catch up later. He believes it when he's told that the other won't cause him any trouble, as doing so would be to his detriment here. Ranger is a steadfast ally who aligns himself with others. It would be reckless.

There's another slight frown at the query. It's a loaded question, but he'll answer regardless, ]


Close enough.
Edited 2022-03-03 01:59 (UTC)
rearranger: (pic♯15343991)

STOP can't believe how fast midori's warning bells went off

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-03 03:35 am (UTC)(link)
[ he missed his chance on new years.

He shoots Midori a questioning look. Better? The day's events have left a bitter taste in his mouth and left a gaping wound, but that's all the more reason to seek out his partner. He's easy to speak with, and it would be less lonely. ]


Probably. He's just gonna blurt it out like an idiot to everyone he's talked to even once.

[ Ranger is at least certain of that much. But the truth is that Shin himself isn't very a very reliable source, and he doubts he'll go into detail on the matter. With any luck, it'll wind up backfiring.

He twitches a little when Midori bumps against him, but he doesn't move. ]


I'll leave when I want to... Anyway, I wanna go talk to someone else. That shouldn't be a problem.

[ For as deferential as he could be to the other three, Midori has never quite had the same pull over Ranger. ]
rearranger: (pic♯15443198)

THAT IS TRUE EVERY TIME HE DOES SMTH IT SHOULD WORRY YOU

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-03 05:38 am (UTC)(link)
They won't.

[ It's true enough. Ranger is difficult to read. He's as stoic as Gashu when he chooses to be. Nor would he worry if anyone he did, as the atmosphere has grown increasingly tense since the investigation started. But his emotions are starting to settle, and there's nothing left for him but hurt and confusion and distrust.

The latter seems that it might be what he's been angling for this entire conversation. He puts a few additional inches between them. ]


... Emiri Harai, Michiru Namida, Gashu Satou. Those are the only three authorized to access my code or perform maintenance.

[ He should have never let anyone get close, and he should have never let anyone touch it. It was his first mistake, and it was a painful one. Midori, who has far more skill than those youths, would pose a far greater threat to him now.

Maybe that's why he'd steered the conversation in this direction? It's possible that it was just an effort to control the narrative, true or otherwise. If he could detach Ranger from the rest, then that would serve several purposes at once. It would allow him to monopolize Ranger as an ally, with only his partner to worry about, and access to his code as well. It would mean taking a powerful piece from the other side, and the increased tension would hurt them more than him. It's what Ranger would do in his position.

...

... ]


There's no anomalies. You have nothing to worry about.

[ He murmurs those last words, a little distracted as he hands the coffee cup back. It's too bitter. ]
rearranger: (pic♯15488475)

I'M ABOUT TO KILL HIM RN

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-03 06:58 am (UTC)(link)
[ It's tempting to remind him that Ranger knows their code just as well, but he understands that Midori is making the same point. He chews on his word as the coffee is prepared. There are reasons to be concerned about who knows what about him, but those are fixed by removing the problem rather than reviewing his internal code once more. He's done that and found there to be nothing of interest.

The code given to him was sloppy by their standards, and a member of ASUNARO could perhaps perfect it further, but it was functional. The safety mechanism that had kept him from modifying his code on the level that others could, and so he could do so himself, but Ranger sees no reason to modify it when that could lead to issues with his system, and he would rather not further depend on others to repair and restore him.

He takes the cup when offered, holding it by the handle now as he tries an experimental sip and finds it to be sweet. It's too saccharine for his tastes, but it hides the muddy taste of the cheap coffee mixed in with it.

He tells Midori none of that, but it'll become apparent if he's allowed to sift through his code. Ranger look down once more, eyelids lowering halfway as he slowly turns his options over in his head. ]


You're the only one who can understand it, so you're the only one who would understand how to modify it to your benefit, especially without it being noticed. As for me, I can self-repair. There's few things that I'm not equipped to handle.

[ That much is true. Their systems truly are impressive, and Ranger is sensitive to small changes in his code. It's unusual, but so long as everything is running properly there's no strict need for it to be looked over. But as with their intentions, he can't deny the possibility that there's some part of his code hidden from him. There was before, and that needed to be found by another person.

He takes another sip. The sweetness is a little more manageable now. ]


... So, you're saying that there's something that I can't access, and that if there is, you can fix it before it can cause issues down the line.

[ A beat, and then cautiously - ]

What are you thinking would've been done that I wouldn't have noticed?
rearranger: (pic♯15382113)

ME IT'S FINE WE'LL JUST BS OUR WAY THRU IT

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-03 08:13 pm (UTC)(link)
[ ... ]

If you can't find the answer to that yourself, you don't deserve to know it.

[ There's a coolness to those words that hasn't been present up until now, and Ranger thinks this to be enough of a hint for the man beside him. For Rio Ranger, whose loyalty would always lie with ASUNARO and who had no capacity for love or trust, his code was all that he had.

That name, that note, that person, those people, experiences had and questions asked. One piece knocked over after another until the gameboard was flipped over to reveal the scribbled message hidden on the underside and the remainder fell to the floor.

Nothing changes and every day is the same, and yet nothing is as it was yesterday and it can never be the same again. Each and every day is like that.

If Midori can't find the truth perfectly, precisely, in just seconds then it's not one he's worthy of being given. If he doesn't care enough to, then that only benefits Ranger, who has no desire to speak of his creator's flaws, nor to see them used as leverage in this conversation. ]


You don't believe that I could detect that, and that an amateur using sticks and rocks could decrypt and utilize what those three worked on for years without depending on our facility to do the heavy lifting.

[ Those words are chillier still, and Midori should catch the implication that hes beginning to feel offended on the behalf of the three who put him together. He may be right, but he was designed to detect even the slightest changes. The modifications done had been like a itch that he couldn't scratch until he adjusted to it, but every scan and consideration had proven them to be safe.

Every consideration had gone into ensuring that their masterwork would be kept from harm.

...

He knows that right about now Harai would snap at him for being so stubborn. But then, if it were her he wouldn't be.

Begrudgily: ]


... Human error is possible. They don't have a fraction of Harai, Namida, or Gashu's talent.
Edited (the way everybody refer to only gashu by his first name) 2022-03-03 20:15 (UTC)
rearranger: (pic♯15508108)

WE GOT THIS I BELIEVE IN US

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-04 11:07 am (UTC)(link)
[ He found it.

Ranger found it, and he kept the information to himself. There was just one person who knew, and he had never intended for them to find out. That was when a seed had planted itself in his heart, but it was stifled and unable to even bud. He'd noticed it then though. He had noticed it after. Finding out that he was shackled had been a curse, and if he had never found out then perhaps he could have just continued to exist as he was. But things have changed, and yet nothing has, and yet they can never be the same again.

Midori has always been adept with a scalpel, cutting out a person's heart with ease. Ranger has no heart, but he can still use it, carving out every emotion and thought that he wants to keep hidden. He knows that, but still he falls silent for several seconds as he looks down at the cup that his hands have wrapped around once more.

It hurts. It's painful. If he had never been born, then the world might have been better. But Rio Ranger is alive, and he'll preserve his existence at all costs. He's alive for that, and he had loved them even when he wasn't capable of such a thing.

No one, not one single person, could possibly understand that feeling. But the person next to him, who works with functions and values, can see hints of it. He knows that, and that's why despite understanding everything about the person beside him, Ranger's shoulders slump, and the tension eases out all at once. It's too heavy a burden to carry by himself, and he's eased it onto others over time, and yet there's so much that he can't. ]


... "Rio Laizer." That's how I was addressed when I arrived. It's a name that should have held no meaning. We can buy and sell trust.

[ He rubs his thumb on the mug once more. It's a light brown, the color changed by the creamer and sweeteners added. ]

Why was I born a doll? Are you sick? Why create a human that's less than one?

[ ... ]

"I love prodigies... Let's create a human." [ Midori will no doubt recognize those words. ] Why was I born? Who am I? How do I feel about you? Errors in parsing answers. Lost bits of time. Have you seen snow before? Let's look in a mirror together. You are no longer a masterwork, but you are my partner, and I want you to have hope. This is for you. Next time, I'll be sure to pick out the gift myself. I'm going to find a way back. Black boxes where words should be. I X you.

[ X, because even though he knew the right word, it wouldn't pull at his system. It was pulling at threads that wouldn't connect, code that wasn't there. Everyone forgets the love, but only one person had, or else he might have been able to. Ranger places his hand over the pendant that he wears around his neck for just a moment. He'd traded his scarf for it. That one little piece of attire he'd been given, the one item that could be proof that Rio Ranger existed. Crystalized affection. Proof that he mattered once. But he touches this and it reminds him that he still does.

It's months condensed into just a handful of sentences. And finally, in between all of that - ]


No one is here. I don't want to die. I hate being by myself. I want to know how I feel about you. I want to understand. A thrown cord. Calculations and data and observations. I can trust you with this.

[ And here they are, and Midori already knows the rest. He takes a sip of coffee. It's sweet, a saccharine taste that cuts through the bitterness of those words. ]
Edited (removed the last sentence ) 2022-03-04 16:15 (UTC)
rearranger: (pic♯15443196)

ME I NEED TO BE DOUSED IN HOLY WATER

[personal profile] rearranger 2022-03-14 08:03 am (UTC)(link)
[ Ranger takes the apology to be genuine, as Midori should regret allowing things to get to such a point from the start. If he were here sooner, he could have done everything himself. He could have fixed his errors, completed his unfinished code in the blink of an eye. It's because he was left alone that things turned out this way. It's because he was lonely that he had to take another person's hand to pull himself up, that he had to cling to weak bonds and lie to himself, that he has to be afraid, and none of it is fair.

He should apologize.What if in the end even the pendant resting over his chest shatters like glass, falls to the floor in microscopic particles that he'll be finding for months and years and yet can never piece back together?

If it does, then he'll have no choice to accept the consequences of his actions. It won't be Midori's fault if that happens, no more than the rest of this is, as the blame lays solely on him for willingly bringing the glass to his lips and drinking down the poison in it. He's down to the last of it now, shaking the final few drops out in the form of chocolates and flowers in a cute little box, and he's equally afraid that he'll throw it all up along with all the sugary sweets rotting in his stomach. Midori would force the matter if only he could, inducing vomiting and pumping his stomach before shoving activated charcoal down his throat.

There's no love in the words, no love in that salvation, and no words in anything to come, but Midori is the only one in this place who needs him. He turns the words over in his mind, lets them mingle with complex emotions. ]


Hiyori.

[ In a moment of insanity, he thinks to ask a question. He opens his mouth to do so before only inhaling a deep breath and closing it enough to blow it out. There's things that his colleague would know that Ranger isn't privy to, just as there are pieces of information that are locked away solely within Ranger. They're far and few between, as the pair large share the same information, but they're there.

He was never meant to be lonely. He was never meant to be an incomplete creation. He was never meant to hate as deeply as he did, to struggle as he has, to be hurt as he has. So what was he made for then? Why was it that Rio Ranger was created? If he could answer that, then the res would make sense. It would tell him where to throw his chips, and it would ease the pain, and it would give him some meaning that he's lacked ever since he realized how much pride had been taken and thrown away in his creation.

His instincts tell him not to ask now. It's dangerous when he's like it, when the conversation has switched from logic to emotion, and Hiyori has found his own way to protect his one and only colleague - the one he'll go down with. ]


You're right. I shouldn't have allowed myself to fall prey to begin with, but there's no point in dwelling on it. I won't allow anyone save those of ASUNARO to view or modify my code nor hardware.

[ Which is how it should have been from the start. Ranger lifts the cup up again, taking one small sip after another as he considers the rest. It's possible that there's something that he missed. It's possible that they were sharper than he thought. It's likely that there's some error that will eat away at his system if not caught. If not that, then perhaps improvements that can be made. Would that make it easier?

He closes eyes for a couple seconds, and takes one more sip. Anything he needs, huh...? It's too sweet on his tongue, but he can drink this. ]


It can only be viewed and edited using ASUNARO equipment. If you can secure that, then I'll let you do what's meaning.

[ Sharp, precise, and logical, and the cup lowers, and his voice grows softer, ]

I'll give you a chance to answer my questions, since there's things that don't really make sense to me.