CLUB PROPOSAL (april 27th, PDA network)

[tempingforatlas]

After what happened yesterday, it's clear that despite the best efforts of our faculty, the school isn't perfectly safe for students. And I don't know about the rest of you, but I don't want to see anything like this happen again.

So, I have a proposal: the creation of a Self Defense Club. For the concerned teachers who are worried about even more violent incidents being incited by this club, let me reassure you.

1. I am under no circumstances arming students.
2. I am not teaching them martial arts. Honestly, I don't even know any.
3. But I am very good at running away, and my first priority is making sure that everyone knows how to get away from assailants and to help first. My second is teaching club members how to incapacitate assailants if they can't run, and I will only be teaching things I've learned for that express purpose.

If anybody else is interested in Self Defense Club, please hit this post up or contact me personally. It's open to everyone, even teachers if they want. We're all in this together.

Please stay safe.

Comments

[hatesdeerstalkers]

Ah, yes. A splendid idea! Of course you would be so worried about others, Ritsuka.

[Moriarty is here to praise Ritsuka and basically nothing else, thank]

Though honestly, those sorts of skills should be more widely taught. Too many people end up helpless and frozen when the time comes, making it much easier for whoever has ill intent upon them.

[Hey Moriarty do you have experience with that]

[tempingforatlas]

i think the skill you need to work on is figuring out how to say things that don't make you sound incredibly sinister to casual passers-by ;p

[hatesdeerstalkers]

WHAT, I am the perfect dandy gentleman! How could you say such a thing, Master? :(

[tempingforatlas]

moriarty.

do you honestly think i don't know about the gambling racket you set up at chaldea?

1/2

[hatesdeerstalkers]

WHO SNITCHED

[hatesdeerstalkers]

I - I mean....I haven't the foggiest what you're speaking of!

[Yes he fucking wrote out the goddamn stutter.]

[tempingforatlas]

...

i was taking a shot in the dark actually but i think we really do need to talk about this now

[hatesdeerstalkers]

Ritsuka I was jokiiiiiiiiiiiiing

[You can practically hear the old man whine through the text.]

[tempingforatlas]

:/

you are forgiven on the condition you let me cheat off your math homework

1/2

[hatesdeerstalkers]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

....You've just asked a Math Professor to help you cheat on homework.

[tempingforatlas]

what kind of math professor would you be if i flunked out of math class here huh

c'mon weren't you the one who went on and on about teaching me how to make the hard decisions to survive

[Ritsuka is fully aware he backed out of that, and is in fact snickering at her PDA somewhere across the school.]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

Yes, but academic cheating is a level of evil even I will not touch!! Mark my words, if I find even the most barest sliver of evidence that you have copied your work from another, I will let the faculty know and let you suffer the consequences of your actions, young lady!

[Uh oh, did she hit a secret button of his?]

[tempingforatlas]

okay, okay, i get your point, geeze

dad

[Ritsuka's ultimate secret technique has been unleashed. Will Moriarty be able to withstand it?]

1/???

[hatesdeerstalkers]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

d

[Yes that's all that he sends for a second]

done

[hatesdeerstalkers]

Do you

truly



mean that?

[The spaces are the pauses between replies.]

[tempingforatlas]

[oh nuts it was TOO effective

Well, Ritsuka was never one to back down from sincerity.]

i mean

yes???????

i originally busted the "dad" out to mess with you but also, yes, for real

[Granted, Ritsuka considers a lot of Servants her new dads. Hektor, Waver, Scathach, Vlad, even Hijikata somehow.]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

[She doesn't get a reply, but there is a loud THUD from somewhere in the school.

Congrats, you've murdered him. A Body has been discovered, report Ritsuka to the faculty for 300 merit points.]

[improbablenotimpossible]

A good idea.

With what has been happening, everyone should learn some means of defending themselves.

[tempingforatlas]

you know you could honestly teach people a thing or two about reading intent/body language tbh, maybe even some baritsu if any of it can be used to escape holds and stuff like that

[improbablenotimpossible]

[It actually takes a second to respond]

I cannot say I am a good teacher, though I suppose I could try?

Oh... if you are planning to make it an official club, to get resources - I would suggest calling it an 'exercise' club.

[tempingforatlas]

nah

i want to be up front about what this is, exactly

if they say no the first time i might retool it but going along with the general attitude of "everything is fine" doesn't seem like a good idea, especially now

[improbablenotimpossible]

Since you've been here longer, I will trust your judgment there.

If it does get through, let me know and I will see what I can come up with that should be doable for most people.

m.montgomery

[yourpiecenow]

i think we should give every kid a gun

[tempingforatlas]

you volunteering to supply?

[yourpiecenow]

oh yeah sure let me just fire up my fucking forge like im a fuckless loser at a renfaire

[tempingforatlas]

i mean, if you try hard enough you CAN forge stuff using things from the woodshop, but that's besides the point

for real though, if you know gun defense that would be helpful. i don't think anyone's going to barge in here with a gun but it'd be good to know how to safely disarm that kind of thing, just in case

[yourpiecenow]

i dont know shit about guns except that every 12 year old here should have one. im just putting my incredibly good ideas out there.

[tempingforatlas]

a lot of twelve year olds and younger i know would be perfectly capable of wielding guns tbh i can see where you're coming from

text; un: n.ebalon

[silentabyss]

honestly glad someone else is in agreement abt this
ive been helping ppl learn how 2 break out of chokeholds and stuff
im worried abt people here tbh so id like to sign up, im sure theres stuff i could leran from u too
learn*

[tempingforatlas]

on the one hand i'm glad you're taking the initiative, noah!

on the other i'm even more glad that i came up with the idea of a club because hooooboy you could get in REAL trouble for that if the teachers caught you

[silentabyss]

i think im already viewed as a delinquent anyway so its no skin off my nose
but yeah i mean good call
i mean knowing basic self defense is just common sense no matter what, right? so count me in for the club if u get the OK to make it

[tempingforatlas]

radical i can't wait for your help

un: b.hood

[dokkans]

Hmm, that's not a bad idea. Although you really should reconsider arming students. Even the weaker ones need a way to fight back.

Re: un: b.hood

[tempingforatlas]

i don't want the murderer and/or kouji's assailant to come into class and know exactly how we're going to fight them

like, okay

here's the thing. i'm guessing you know knife defense, right? what do you do if somebody comes at your eye with a knife

i swear i'm going somewhere with this

[dokkans]

Stab them first?

[ ?????? ]

[tempingforatlas]

you know what fair

but what if somebody is coming at you with just some random... thing. you can't even see it, you don't know how to guard against it, you don't know to get past it with your own knife. that half second it takes to process someone coming at you with, like, an astrolabe, or a chair leg, or the lid of a dumpster has saved me a LOT of times

that's the sort of thing i want to teach here

[dokkans]

Oh! So instinct, having the quick wits to strike first. That's useful! Granted of course, you have anyone with the nerve to give it a try. Just out of curiosity, if one wants to assist with that, what would they get in compensation?