CLUB PROPOSAL (april 27th, PDA network)

[tempingforatlas]

After what happened yesterday, it's clear that despite the best efforts of our faculty, the school isn't perfectly safe for students. And I don't know about the rest of you, but I don't want to see anything like this happen again.

So, I have a proposal: the creation of a Self Defense Club. For the concerned teachers who are worried about even more violent incidents being incited by this club, let me reassure you.

1. I am under no circumstances arming students.
2. I am not teaching them martial arts. Honestly, I don't even know any.
3. But I am very good at running away, and my first priority is making sure that everyone knows how to get away from assailants and to help first. My second is teaching club members how to incapacitate assailants if they can't run, and I will only be teaching things I've learned for that express purpose.

If anybody else is interested in Self Defense Club, please hit this post up or contact me personally. It's open to everyone, even teachers if they want. We're all in this together.

Please stay safe.

Comments

[tempingforatlas]

i think the skill you need to work on is figuring out how to say things that don't make you sound incredibly sinister to casual passers-by ;p

[hatesdeerstalkers]

WHAT, I am the perfect dandy gentleman! How could you say such a thing, Master? :(

[tempingforatlas]

moriarty.

do you honestly think i don't know about the gambling racket you set up at chaldea?

1/2

[hatesdeerstalkers]

WHO SNITCHED

[hatesdeerstalkers]

I - I mean....I haven't the foggiest what you're speaking of!

[Yes he fucking wrote out the goddamn stutter.]

[tempingforatlas]

...

i was taking a shot in the dark actually but i think we really do need to talk about this now

[hatesdeerstalkers]

Ritsuka I was jokiiiiiiiiiiiiing

[You can practically hear the old man whine through the text.]

[tempingforatlas]

:/

you are forgiven on the condition you let me cheat off your math homework

1/2

[hatesdeerstalkers]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

....You've just asked a Math Professor to help you cheat on homework.

[tempingforatlas]

what kind of math professor would you be if i flunked out of math class here huh

c'mon weren't you the one who went on and on about teaching me how to make the hard decisions to survive

[Ritsuka is fully aware he backed out of that, and is in fact snickering at her PDA somewhere across the school.]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

Yes, but academic cheating is a level of evil even I will not touch!! Mark my words, if I find even the most barest sliver of evidence that you have copied your work from another, I will let the faculty know and let you suffer the consequences of your actions, young lady!

[Uh oh, did she hit a secret button of his?]

[tempingforatlas]

okay, okay, i get your point, geeze

dad

[Ritsuka's ultimate secret technique has been unleashed. Will Moriarty be able to withstand it?]

1/???

[hatesdeerstalkers]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

d

[Yes that's all that he sends for a second]

done

[hatesdeerstalkers]

Do you

truly



mean that?

[The spaces are the pauses between replies.]

[tempingforatlas]

[oh nuts it was TOO effective

Well, Ritsuka was never one to back down from sincerity.]

i mean

yes???????

i originally busted the "dad" out to mess with you but also, yes, for real

[Granted, Ritsuka considers a lot of Servants her new dads. Hektor, Waver, Scathach, Vlad, even Hijikata somehow.]

[hatesdeerstalkers]

[She doesn't get a reply, but there is a loud THUD from somewhere in the school.

Congrats, you've murdered him. A Body has been discovered, report Ritsuka to the faculty for 300 merit points.]