(may catch-all) the cool kids table, but rika's the only cool kid

[unsurely]

‣ WHO: Shuichi Saihara & a bunch of people!
‣ WHEN: All throughout May.
‣ WHERE: Various locations.
‣ WHAT: Catch-all for May starters.
‣ WARNINGS: Just mild NDRV3 & SDR2 spoilers so far, subject to change.

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Tfw neither you nor like half of everyone you have plans with top-level, so this happens. I'm using this to write starters for people based on stuff we discussed beforehand. No open prompts, but if you want something specific with me or Saihara during May, I'm still up for that and you're free to throw a starter in here!

Alternately, hit me up via Plurk at garlemald or contact me on Discord at Rina#8760 whenever to discuss.

Comments

[unsurely]

Our Ultimate talents... aren't what makes us people.

[ The more he argues against it, the more he knows he's right. And as usual when he is, that same sense of dread gathers steadily in the pit of his stomach, churning slowly until it courses through his whole body. He feels locked in place, the sensation of a shiver that never really ran its course frozen stiff against the lines of his back. Why...? He never asked to be chosen by the Ultimate Initiative -- never wanted to be the Ultimate Detective. That case he solved... most of the time, he doesn't even want to have solved it at all.

But that... should be irrelevant. Whether he likes it or not, whether he has it or not, that title isn't everything that defines him, either. He refuses to believe that it is, with every fiber of his being. ]

...You did do a lot for me, and I'm grateful for that. If you hadn't been here last month... I don't know what I'd have done with myself.

[ Because as always, he's weak and incapable of anything on his own, without someone else there to push his back. If Komaeda hadn't found him and encouraged him, he might not have taken those first few steps that he did -- might not have started to actually look for the truth. He might still be cowering in a corner, only making half-efforts and trying to justify it by saying he doesn't have enough to work with. When in fact, he was just afraid. Afraid of the things he might find. But maybe in the process... he just relied on the other a little too much, and ended up putting pressure on him.

So, no matter what, he won't run from this either. It's not fair if he does so precisely when the person who helped him seems to need him. ]

But in the first place... I didn't come here to seek reassurance for that. You know that, right? I'm sorry if I gave the impression that's what I wanted... Forget about me being the Ultimate Detective. It doesn't-- I don't want it to matter right now.

[ ...That's it, in the end. The simplest of truths behind what he hoped to find. ]

I just... wanted to see you. As Saihara Shuichi.

[commences]

( their talents is what makes them anything at all, it's the start of their hope, it explains how strong their hope is — how much they amount to. it has always been like that, hope's peak academy had made it so, and komaeda who follows that place with all his heart knows what's right and what's wrong, his truth that an ultimate's talent reveals their capabilities. even after its destruction, the same thing stays true after all he's done, it's the their talent that chooses whether hope or despair wins, and while komaru (talentless ((derogatory))) was used to test this theory — neither one won, so who would komaeda continue to cherish? it's the ultimates that are needed to survive, they're wanted by the people, so why would saihara say something so humiliating about himself? the logic behind it is something komaeda's unable to understand, it puts him in a difficult position — )

I want to be used by you then, and even now...

( it comes out slow, he inhales deeply right after as he swallows down another helping of the fumes. his mind is in the right place when it comes to the other, but that's for any ultimate he comes across. yet, his voice is genuine, something he truly believes deep down, and he doesn't understand why they have to argue about this specifically. )

Everything I did was... for your hope, for their hope... ( his tone has a tinge of excitement, a little rushed. ) How brilliant yours shown when offering your talent to those ordinary people who know nothing... ( he inhales, slow. ) ...without you, how far would they have come?

( even now they count on him, they look forward to saihara's thoughts, his words, and it's not like komaeda really had anything to do with that. he just wanted to make sure the other had a hand pushing him forward, putting him in a comfortable position where he could act without worry. despite the irritation he's had though half this conversation, he's able to stare at his hand with a smile.

komaeda nagito doesn't know who saihara shuichi is. )

And you're throwing it away to talk to me as... who? See me... as who? We're not ordinary, we're completely different from those insects we're surrounded by.

( a flip in his emotions, his annoyance visible, and he's unable to understand what saihara wants from him, or is asking from him. the standpoint saihara comes from, to speak with him on a level where their talents aren't needed, but as a person sounds so agonizing to him. the moment he's about to speak is where he brings a hand to his mouth, coughing. it's a little rough, but komaeda's not the healthiest person around, and as he pulls his hand away, his eyes no longer watch saihara, and drift off elsewhere. almost like he's repeating what's being said to him. ) I'm boring, too generic to be significant, as irrelevant as I am... ( especially if it's coming from him, and he's able to smile with flushed cheeks content with what he knows is true. ) I can accept that.

( away from one corner, back to viewing saihara properly, and his voice lowers, but that visible affection gone from what it was — )

Are you willing to throw everything away to be someone like that?