(closed) this ain't build a bitch

[commences]

Who: Nagito Komaeda & anyone who hits me up
What: October Catch-all
When: 10/01 onwards
Where: Various locations
Warnings: TBA

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i'm filled with flaws and attitude,
so if you need perfect, i'm not built for you.

This post serves as a place for me to gather all of Komaeda's closed threads, starters, miscellany through the month. If you want to set something up, I can be reached by PM or at sakasaki

Comments

[commences]

He's?

( it rolls off his tongue, no name attached to whoever that mystery person is, and it makes him feel even more entitled to his actions. he remains in front of the door, arms crossed while accepting the way hinata looks at him, and it's almost painful — it's been awhile, but komaeda prepared him for him, for when he'll betray hinata. )

Don't look at me like that Hinata-kun... especially when you're not the only one who has lost someone.

( komaeda lost hinata, too, in a way, so the irony of this directed at him is quite hilarious, but he seems to forgotten how to laugh. )

[futurebullets]

Dito. [The name rolls off his tongue with loathing.] The one that killed Saihara and Kawai.

[It almost makes him see red, just to say it. Just to know that he's out there and Komaeda is keeping him pinned in here in the meantime.

"I guess I might only be imagining it, but... it almost feels like you've been working even harder this year."

Hinata's eyes burn.]

Do... Do you actually think I don't know that? I know there's a whole life here I forgot, but- do you seriously think I went to club with my eyes closed, that I didn't see you with Saihara or Amami with Kawai-?!

[He doesn't realize his voice has even raised to a shout until his fist is striking the bed behind him.]

Of course I know, I know what he took from us! God damn it, Komaeda, why the hell do you think I'm angry in the first place?!

[commences]

( having a name, knowing a face, that's all it takes to put hinata in danger who has nothing to protect himself with. is he listening to what he' saying, is he putting together what happened — rika died. saihara died. they lost to him, they both because stepping stones individually, and there's a purpose right here, right now. if he could tell hinata to get over it, he would, but instead he stands here listening to him yell. he isn't surprised by it, his feelings overweigh anything that's logical, and it would since he cared for those two, even before his memory blurred. )

Stop seeing me.

( if this is how it works, if hinata's eyes didn't perceive things like that then maybe he could base this around just his emotions. don't be angry for him too, there's no need to overcomplicate it, it's not the first time someone has been taken from komaeda, and it sure won't be the last, and if he can help it — if he can beat his own luck, he won't let that same person take hinata too. )

You're weak, you have nothing that can combat against him. ( he sizes hinata up, but doesn't move from his location against the door. ) All you're doing is making a fool of yourself, run out there, and he'll drive that same spear through you as well.

( his words draw to a flat line, tired, no longer wearing that calming smile of his as a hand lifts up to run through his hair, he pushes back a few backs behind his ear — they slip from under, his one tickling against the bridge of his nose as it falls back into place. )

[futurebullets]

I always see you. More than anybody else.

[It comes out sharp, but it doesn't last. Hinata's expression flickers, more wounded now than raw. The words hit him where it hurts.]

Look, I... I know I'm not strong like Nidai or Owari. I don't even know what my talent is, right? [The words burrow into his chest, feel like a poison burning his veins.] But... You can't just expect me to sit here and do nothing when that bastard is wandering around out there free as a bird. Even if I'd be useless against him... there's no way I can just accept that.

[commences]

No you don't.

( his voice sounds flat this time around, like it's obvious hinata is lying to himself, and to komaeda. )

Do you hear yourself? If you saw me, you wouldn't attempt to run to your death... all you see is revenge, and you'll die doing so.

( it sounds crazy hearing hinata say even if he is useless, and komaeda cashes in on the truth, because what can he do? it's the one word that gnaws at his thoughts, "if", a struggle he's having with himself to not just call the other an idiot for it. )

Is that what you want? I didn't take you for the type who was so suicidal, not actively, anyway. ...Should have left you where we found you if death is what you want so bad, what was the point of Saihara-kun going as far as he did for your survival just for you to... throw it away.

( hinata isn't that hinata anymore, he's a talentless individual with nothing going for him. he's weak, he feels weak, and that room to grow will never see the light of day. the thought worries him, and then he pushes it behind himself. what should komaeda care for, why would hinata make such a rash, and crazy decision like to bother dito? it's pathetic, and the way he goes along with this conversation feels like so. )