yogen | npc contact.3

( He likes her more than a bad review, sorry.

Balance though... He follows her example to the rink and edges onto the ice, a little too aware of the concept now that it's been brought up. He should be fine--he hasn't noticed anything too drastic--but since she mentioned it... He wishes she hadn't. )

At FIRST, but I've gotten used to adjusting my balance as needed over the MONTHS.

( Has it already been three months since then? ...

He does hold onto the wall at first, pulling himself around the rink a little and leaning against it. When was the last time he'd done this? ...Maybe she'll teach him something yet. )

It hasn't been as bad as I thought it might BE. ( considering other visual-related pursuits. ) I'm sure if I had picked going deaf instead I'd have a bit of a harder time THOUGH.

( haha. hmm. )

If you had to choose between the TWO, which would you PICK?

[ It should be something on his mind at all times, not just for ice skating but for being around the school— if he ever gets into a situation like the practicum, or being outside in the forest, or one of the cats getting underfoot.

... ]

Of the two, I would rather be deaf.

[ It's a distasteful question, but one she can answer, her first instinct being to give up her hearing in exchange for being able to see. People are always walking around with headphones or daydreaming lost in their own heads, anyways, not being able to hear the world around you can come to be natural. In a place like this, though...

And, also, ]

If I couldn't see, I wouldn't know when Hiro needs me.

[ Deaf is fine, when your twin brother hardly ever speaks anyways. But she has to see to do charades. ]

I thought that would be your anSWER.

( Even if it puts her at a disadvantage, not being able to hear when someone's coming. Her brother's more important to her. ...She wouldn't be able to hear him, either. He geeently pushes himself out to the center of the rink, stopping using his hand on her shoulder.

...

He moves it away, looking to the right so he can keep her in his dimming peripheral left. )

Hiro-kun isn't selFISH, and he loves you more than anything in the WORLD. He'd accommodate for YOU, just like you accommodate for HIM.

( That's just how siblings are. Even Natsume, with his bloodless relatives... Back to looking at her, shifting to keep his balance. Better. )

I won't expect him to do that much for ME, but we'll figure something OUT. ( He still has nine months before he's completely blind, but...

...

He swallows that back, because she doesn't like talking about it, and instead swerves back to something safer: ) What's NEXT, Sensei?

You learn best by doing, so...

[ She skates forward, around the perimeter of the rink just slow enough that he can't say she's running away from him, and then loops around so she's behind him. ]

Take two steps and let yourself glide. Then I'm going to push you over.

( This would be the ideal place to get rid of him if she wanted to, though. Supposedly trapped in the middle of an ice rink, and all she'd have to do is bolt back to the elevator and leave him to die. )

...An idol's face is their most important selling POINT, so please don't try to break anything of MINE.

( ? Don't push him over... But he'll take two steps and glide as instructed, being a very good boy, though if he hears her actually coming up on him he'll turn around sharply to catch her—

otherwise he'll just keep on keeping on, he's good skating. )

Learn to break your fall instead, then.

[ I wikihow'd how to ice skate and the first step on the rink was to practice falling since it's going to happen inevitably, it sounded reasonable

so yeah she's going to come up behind him and shove him on the back. ]

( I have to wikihow how to ice skate too, I'm glad we share this

but Natsume's, yeah, gonna turn on his heel in a show of "he definitely knows how to ice skate, the lying liar" and grab her hands instead. Now they're holding hands, on the rink, this is so romantic(?). )

... ( ... ) I lied earliER. I can skate perfectly FINE.

( No SHIT! )

Shall we DANCE, Little Wolf? ( ♪ ) I'll teach you how to SPIN.

( please kill him )

Edited 2021-12-24 03:31 (UTC)

[ After the shoelace tying thing I didn't trust myself to know how to skate, I've skated for years but what if i was doing it wrong this entire time

SHE KNEW IT THOUGH, SHE KNEW IT she nearly falls into him with the momentum and she really wants to break his fingers if only she had Chiaki's grip strength but she has to settle for holding his hands a little tighter, so she can rebalance herself or so she can get her murderous intentions across or something like that. ]

We will not. Let go of me. I'm leaving you behind.

You should know better than anyone else that I'm not interested in dyING, so you'll have to try harder to convince me to let you GO.

( Come on... He'll let her get her balance though, and despite his words he does let... one of her hands go, drawing her closer by pulling her other hand up and resting his cheek against their joined hands. Warm. )

...Were you always such an unromantic GIRL, even before you DIED? I don't mind if the answer is YES, but I thought even the most stern of young women still dreamt of skating hand-in-hand with someone ( they liked ) from time to TIME. Or has it been so long that you can't rememBER?

Edited 2021-12-24 04:16 (UTC)

[ Doesn't matter. Most people who get murdered weren't interested in dying, that has no bearing on her abandoning Natsume here and taking the elevator out on her own. ]

It hasn't been that long since I died. [ Not so long that she would forget what a "normal" high school life is supposed to be like, to want to make that her impossible wish for this school. ]

People only fantasize about that sort of thing if they have somebody they like. I didn't.

[ Never liked like anyone, never talked about this sort of stuff to anyone, never held anyone's hand like this, never went on a date with anyone... ]

You would have been the first.

( ...

Natsume stares at her like he isn't sure what she's saying, and even still, maybe he doesn't, because he tends to overthink, and she's been very clear about this and that, but she also doesn't really mince words when she is being honest, even if that isn't always (no matter what she says), and—

He lowers their hands and hopes she can pretend the redness that spreads across the apples of his cheeks and up to his ears is because it's cold in the rink and not because of anything else. For him. For the both of them, because he drops his voice to something quieter, even if they're the only two people here, and always will be, in this moment. )

I can still be the FIRST, at least for toDAY.

[ She doesn't look back at him, doesn't need to see his face when she can feel the heat in his hands— their hands.

It's a bad idea. She knows this. It feels like standing at the edge of a cliff, where if she takes that next step, it's something she can never take back, she can't allow it to happen.

Not even for a day. Not even for an hour. ]

...only because of that impossible wish of yours. That's all this can be, if you're alright with that.

( Ugh— )

I only wrote that because I thought it'd embarrass YOU.

( Because he thought it wasn't possible. It's okay to love people if they won't love you back, even when he isn't completely happy with that, either. He looks away from her, first to the side and then down and then finally up, because looking down actually does mean looking at her, or near her, why does she have to be shorter than him. Terrible. This is...

A terrible idea. For the both of them, but he's already crossed one bridge that shouldn't have been crossed (confessing to her, not that many months ago), and she's admitted if only in technically a hypothetical the same.

"A person she could fall in love with," he wants to kill Komaeda. Maybe when they get back to the school and he sees her off, he'll go find him. )

I'm a very greedy young MAN, so it's NOT, but I know you can't let it go further than THAT.

( ... )

I'll LIVE. In LIFE, I wasn't allowed relationships like this anyWAY. ( Like this. He doesn't know if he's so jittery because this is a terrible idea, or because he's excited. Maybe both. ) Things are gradually changing in the idol indusTRY, but we're still discouraged from getting into anything more romanTIC... I'd say it's no different than HERE.

( Just... for different reasons.

He exhales slowly and tests the waters by linking their fingers, the way he'd wanted to when they were walking together here in the first place. Still not really looking at her, but he's at least looked back down enough to have her in his peripheral. )

The question is: are you okay with THAT? ( ... ) With THIS?

( There's still concern for her and what she wants. Even if he is greedy, even if the feelings he has for her are... )

Edited 2021-12-24 05:54 (UTC)

[ She really wants to punch him, just as much as she wants nothing to do with this, or wants to want nothing to do with this. It's easier when he's not looking at her, hander when he links their fingers; she doesn't squeeze his hand, but she doesn't pull away, either. ]

I still think it's a bad idea. [ because it is one. but- ] But if it's only for today, I'm okay with it.

[ If nothing else, she can trust herself to keep to the boundaries and time limit she's set. Besides, they'll have to go upstairs again eventually, and the persistent smell of blood is very sobering and will remind them of their reality whether they like it or not. ]

( me: why would she want to punch him
natsume: i wrote it to embarrass you
me: oh yeah )

I'll try not to be such a wonderful love interest that you can't ever conceive of life without ME.

( He's joking. Like, he's serious, but also the wording, the words, it's— anyway, he'll pull her to skating proper, nice and slow. We'll take it easy. )

...Thank you for the gift, TOO. I have one for you and Hiro-kun each back at SCHOOL, so don't let me forget to give you them before you leave toDAY. ( He should've just given it when he saw Hiro earlier but no. Don't let me forget to post crimmus gifts for your NPCs too, I'll just backdate it to the 23rd/24th. ) Do you like red bean PASTE?

You don't have to try that hard.

[ He'd have to try harder to do the opposite, and also because the only time I've ever skated holding hands with someone it was with my brother and I tripped and pulled him down while rightening myself up again so I was fine and he faceplanted and refused to do that with me ever again. I'd like to imagine this is what's going through Maya's mind right now, Maya's the big brother. ]

I told Hiro to go home and not wait for me after school, so I can take his. Red bean paste is fine. Why?

No real reaSON.

( good to know though. )

...You know, ( he says after a moment, lips twitching, ) you wouldn't be so adamant about how bad an idea this is if you weren't worried about falling for ME.

I'm not and I won't.

[ He makes it very easy to not do that every time he opens his mouth, that's the only bright side to this ]

It would be a bad idea whether or not I liked you, so it amounts to the same in the end.

[ Like, if she didn't, it's not going to happen. And if she did, it can't happen. There was only ever one option. ]

( He's not straightforward with his feelings and she gets on him, he IS straightforward and she gets on him, he can't win. )

Whatever makes this easier for YOU. ( Sincerely. ) Why are you even entertaining this THOUGH?

( ...A genuine question, that's been on his mind. If she doesn't like him (doesn't hate him, but doesn't like him), why bother doing any of this with him. Dates and skating and fulfilling impossible wishes and not-confessions. )

[ Yeah, why? She can't answer that any more than she can answer why they started going on not-dates in the first place. But she remembers that first not-date, and what Natsume said to her then. ]

Because magicians aren't the only ones who want to make people happy. You wanted to confess to me on Christmas Eve. [ ... ] I'm still going to turn you down, though.

[ just for the record ]

( ... )

It'd make me happier if you didN'T.

( HE CAN'T NOT TRY. )

[ HE CAN IF HE PUTS HIS MIND TO IT ]

Happy is happy. Take what you can get, Sakasaki.

[ hhh she's going to start tugging him forward, let her be the one to lead their way around the rink ]

( HE WOULDN'T BE HIM IF HE DIDN'T TRY THOUGH. IT'S VERY HIM.

but he chuckles because he hadn't expected anything different, honestly. )

Pretend you have someone you LIKE. When would you like them to confess to YOU?

( like we're scheduling this activity into the very busy schedule of (checks notes) this one go at skating )

Right now.

[ Tell her immediately. She has no patience for people dragging things out.

Also yeah their date ends the moment they finish this one loop and make it back to the gate, this is why she's leading. ]

( Hm.

Alright then-- )

《I love you.》

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