12/02 || un: n.sakasaki

[crystallomancy]

Winter. The Worst Season To Ever Exist. It's Cold And Wet And Gross, The Wind Goes Right Through You, And To Top It All Off, You Have To Watch Happy Couples Warm Each Other Up.

Fortunately, I Have Just The Thing To Help What Ails You. Let's Heat Things Up With A Debate, Shall We?

Every Food Can Either Be Categorized As A Soup, A Salad, Or A Sandwich. A Soup Is A Food Whose Liquid Content ("Soupiness") Is Deemed As "High". A Salad Is A Food Whose Liquid Content Is Deemed As Low ("Dressing"). A Sandwich Is Anything That Has What Could Feasibly Be Defined As Bread On Two Or More Sides.

Some Examples:

Pizza Is A Salad. The Liquid Ratio Is Almost None, Even In The Case Of The Greasiest Pizzas. While There Is Something That Can Be Defined As Bread ("The Crust"), It's Only On One Side. However, If You Fold A Pizza In Half, It Becomes A Sandwich.

Bread Bowl Soups Are Sandwiches. This Is Because It Functionally Has Bread On Two Or More Sides.

French Dip Sandwiches Are Soups, Despite Their Misleading Name. Dipping Them Into Au Jus Turns Them Incredibly Soggy, Leading To Their Classification.

Feel Free To Debate And Add Your Own Below. Just Don't Come To Blows Over This, Okay?

Comments

[commences]

@r.nanase
this is your challenger, now i need you to debate!

[goodfaiths]

Huh?? Me?? Uh okay, here I go!

[ moments later-- ]

...But what if I agree with everything b.hood said?

[commences]

neither of you win the money.

[goodfaiths]

Wait, you're serious?! How'd you even get that much money to begin with?

[commences]

wouldn't you like to know, fastfood-kun.

[goodfaiths]

You're still mad about that????

[dokkans]

how the hell is that fair?????? he didn't even put up a fight!

[commences]

make him fight, that's the only way, you know what to do!

[dokkans]

[ as she casually pretends she didn't already respond to komaeda-- ]

then you fell for it! casserole's not a soup, silly. there wouldn't be enough liquid for it! ♥

[goodfaiths]

Um...then it's a salad, right?

And if the ice cream sandwich melted, then it'd become a soup?

[dokkans]

oh, so close! it DOES become a salad, but if an ice cream sandwich melts, is it really even an ice cream sandwich anymore?

[goodfaiths]

Actually, it depends on how it melts!

If most of the melted ice cream's still between the two bread parts, then ti'd still be a sandwich!!! (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ

[dokkans]

[ --Geh! ]

not bad. but then you're just left with wafers that're coated in something gross and liquidy! so the ice cream sandwich no longer exists, and the remaining wafers just become soup!

[ WHY IS SHE GETTING SERIOUS ]

[goodfaiths]

[ The worst part is...he doesn't even care about the money........ ]

Huh? I thought a sandwich was anything that had bread on two sides. It didn't say anything about how high the liquid content had to be!

[dokkans]

guess again! remember the example sakasaki gave! the french dip sandwiches aren't sandwiches because you wind up dipping them and making them really soggy!

[goodfaiths]

Ahhh! You're right! >< So does that just make them...

Ice cream soup? Or cream soup, since it's not icy anymore?

[ i hate this ]

[dokkans]

two soggy wafers with a nice cream soup

hm, maybe i'll use that in the next cooking contest

[goodfaiths]

You can, but...that doesn't sound very good... But did you win this past one?

[dokkans]

it sounds perfectly fine, whatre you talking about.

[ DELIBERATELY, NOT ANSWERING, ]

[goodfaiths]

It doesn't. It just sounds really soggy... What if you made the melted ice cream like a dipping sauce instead?

[ is this where the real argument starts ]

[dokkans]

apparently, they expect the dipping sauces to be hot or fried or whatever they like

[goodfaiths]

What?! Why does it have to be so specific?

[dokkans]

they dont have any room in their hearts for simple snacks, thats why.