12/02 || un: n.sakasaki

[crystallomancy]

Winter. The Worst Season To Ever Exist. It's Cold And Wet And Gross, The Wind Goes Right Through You, And To Top It All Off, You Have To Watch Happy Couples Warm Each Other Up.

Fortunately, I Have Just The Thing To Help What Ails You. Let's Heat Things Up With A Debate, Shall We?

Every Food Can Either Be Categorized As A Soup, A Salad, Or A Sandwich. A Soup Is A Food Whose Liquid Content ("Soupiness") Is Deemed As "High". A Salad Is A Food Whose Liquid Content Is Deemed As Low ("Dressing"). A Sandwich Is Anything That Has What Could Feasibly Be Defined As Bread On Two Or More Sides.

Some Examples:

Pizza Is A Salad. The Liquid Ratio Is Almost None, Even In The Case Of The Greasiest Pizzas. While There Is Something That Can Be Defined As Bread ("The Crust"), It's Only On One Side. However, If You Fold A Pizza In Half, It Becomes A Sandwich.

Bread Bowl Soups Are Sandwiches. This Is Because It Functionally Has Bread On Two Or More Sides.

French Dip Sandwiches Are Soups, Despite Their Misleading Name. Dipping Them Into Au Jus Turns Them Incredibly Soggy, Leading To Their Classification.

Feel Free To Debate And Add Your Own Below. Just Don't Come To Blows Over This, Okay?

Comments

[crystallomancy]

It'll Actually Feel A Little More Normal To Me If We Get Philosophical, So We Can Get As Deep As You'd Like.

[carpevinum]

My second thought to this really was just that humans are also 60% water.

My third thought is that, if I am recalling my middle school science correctly, humans share about 60% of their DNA with bananas. I would like to argue that this makes humans part banana.

[dokkans]

gosh, is that true? i've been a human all my life, and i'm learning so much more about it today!

about sharing dna with bananas, i mean!

[carpevinum]

It is, yes. @ s.ishigami can correct me if I have something wrong here, but as I understand it, many species closely share DNA even if it seems like they wouldn't.

Humans share 70% of their DNA with slugs, too.

[crystallomancy]

As Logic Follows, That Means Slugs And Bananas Also Share A Certain Amount Of DNA... Aside From The Banana Slug, Which Is 100% Banana and 100% Slug.

[goodfaiths]

Oh!! Does that make bananas and slugs two new categories?

[ ??? Help ]

[crystallomancy]

No. They're Both Still Ingredients For A Salad.

( ????? HELP )

[carpevinum]

I once read a news report from the human world depicting a human eating a banana slug and dying. I do not recommend them as a salad topping, but I can see where the confusion lies.

[goodfaiths]

So...a salad of death... ><

Wouldn't a slug be more like a soup though? Isn't it kind of...you know...

[carpevinum]

If the slug is by itself, I would count a slug as a salad due to the fact that it's still mostly solid, as far as I'm aware. Wetness =/= soup.

[crystallomancy]

Correct. Slugs Are Moist, Not Soggy.

[goodfaiths]

Oh, I get it now! So a banana would be a salad unless it's dipped in water, or made into a smoothie?