yogen | npc contact.2

( Natsume opens his mouth

shuts it and thinks about it, really thinks about it. It's difficult, killing people you like; but it wouldn't be the first time. He pushes himself to standing, brushing dirt off of his clothes as he thinks about what it would entail—the steeling of his heart, the ability to fight a spirit, the silence of the courtyard in the aftermath.

The loneliness. )

...If you ask me TO. ( It's hard for him to say, but he looks up at Kazuki and says it anyway; it sounds difficult for him to say, too, the words hesitantly falling from his lips. ) I wouldn't refuse YOU.

( "how do crystal balls work" is me i don't know, you look at them and you interpret from the lights and shadows in them. in my witch movies there's some weird fog and then whatever they're scrying just shows up. my knowledge of how crystal balls work is all from the hit classic the wizard of oz (1939) when the wicked witch of the west uses it to spy on dorothy and co. there's a reason i only offer card readings whenever i do fortune stuff send help we're blind leading the blind

just pop off and have fun ig )

[ The light touch on his palm and across his clavicle sends a shiver up his spine, but not in a bad way. Just... a weird way. The sort of way he ignores by running a checklist of nerves in his mind instead and being pleasantly surprised that Subaru's got this down. And this is from a person who calls the sacrum a butt plate. ]

Good job.

[ ... okay, yeah, back to work on the skeleton ]

The nerves that are just "out there" have to be, in order to sense the things around you. Like how you have to leave your house in order to learn about the world.

You limited me to five letters
Unagi and ochazuke go well together

I'd much rather return to cruel reality than lose myself to fantasy.

[ aka she does not want to get brain damage, you're not tricking her, Sakasaki

Maybe if she were able to visit again in short intervals, like taking a brief nap in the middle of the afternoon to recharge, she would take the time to look around and imagine what this place would look like during the day, vibrant and full of life.

But she's not going to let herself get sucked into something she knows to be impossible. Instead she keeps an eye out for that shop, and this one she does linger slightly in front of, supposing Natsume wouldn't be able to tell the difference between her checking out the alleyway for mugger and her glancing at the jewelry. Did I say she likes dragonflies somewhere? because I remember Komaeda catching dragonflies to give to her and I can't imagine why. So she likes dragonflies now. ]

I'll be going on ahead, then.

( he knows, he's heard him say it over and over that komaeda didn't ruin his life, that he made every decision, and rokkun's just someone who accumulates bad luck. even through all of that, seeing him angry, upset, even those days he worked off feelings when he wanted to give and have nothing in return — komaeda had always thought if he didn't pry, if he had done things differently, then maybe. it could be rooted into his way of thinking, maybe it is, that so much that happens around him is his fault, even if he isn't there, lady luck decides to play her hand.

komaeda would equally share the good and the bad with him, that tumultuous whirlwind of their luck must have drawn him in, even if at that moment it was just his good luck at work. if he kept finding him, then there had to be a reason, his will, that drive... his hope.

there were times komaeda would ask if any of rokkun's marks were because of both of them, or mostly him, and he remembers something he said, it echoes in his mind. "you were there for this one, and that one... the one here too... [...] ...physically, at least." so that constitutes to... that? that he watched him die, physically, but what he thought, and how he felt... almost sounds like a short-lived relationship, he's even said he didn't imagine he would live this long. did the komaeda then feel anything, if he didn't, then that was an improvement, and if he did... it's because he's not heartless. that human trait chains him down too, he feels happy, he feels sad, and... it always feels complicated.

yet, he can't stop himself from cupping the other's face, his thumbs brushing against his cheeks, and his heart aches, or maybe that sickly feeling in his stomach makes him nauseous. he's said it before, if he could have somebody's love then he could die happy. slowly, his fingers push back a bit of black hair, eyes staring right into rokkun's own like he's searching for something. his mouth parts, inhaling, it's hypocritical he believes to be like this... even when the other almost died, komaeda at that moment, didn't want him to go, asking for help... the last thing he'd do, he so used to doing things alone that...

for some reason, he breaks out the norm that he knows for him, only a small step because he doesn't fully cross it. he's nervous, his organic fingers twitch against rokkun's cheek, his prosthetic is completely still, sort of... one finger there twitches too. he's overthinking it, perhaps he's waiting for rokkun to say that he's joking, that he doesn't mean it: this love of theirs. though, he presses their forehead together, the faintest brush of their nose, and maybe he can feel the way komaeda's lips ghost over his own.

with his eyes closed, his voice barely above a whisper, he thinks it over and over — just between them, only for them. )

"Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation."

[ All of us staring at this crystal ball like it's foggy black... maybe a little bit of brown from the table...

... ]

Can you sort of see a face...? [ like if he squints and uses his imagination ] If those two lighter spots are the eyes... Somebody with black hair and brown eyes.

[ So. 99% of the student body. ]

[nerves are a lot cooler than bones in his opinion. everyone's seen a skeleton before, but have they every considered any sort of nervous system as a halloween prop? no. they don't realize how terrifying it would be. now they will.]

That's not a bad way to think about it~. Do you tutor people, Rocchan?

( ............ )

Sato-san, have you looked around at who attends this school lateLY? For all you KNOW, you could be describing Hiro-kun.

[ I was about to be very concerned by "everyone's seen a skeleton before" and then went oh ]

No.

[ A sharp no. A "no way in hell" no. ]

[BUT THEY HAVE ORI]

Jeez, so much for being a dependable senpai~. Why not? I think you're really good at it, I wouldn't be half as interested in doing bone study if you weren't having me learn like this.

[it's sincere, too -- subaru dislikes classwork, but this is fun. even if it's just for middle schoolers, even if it's making up for a little bit of lost time... he actually really appreciates it]

Shut up.

[ look!!!! at least she has a very good chance of being right! ]

I know what his voice sounds like. It wasn't him.

[ "Hiro would never" he would, but the voice doesn't match so she crosses him off the list ]

@ r.arata
how many holes does a straw have

if i gave you more letters, what would you have said?

It was a face that resembled a college girl, and it was the love story of her, and her stalker.

( he'll pass the pda over to npckun, now they're able to read everything. )

I believe... he's scared, of loving you properly, of hurting you, and so he asked for advice.

( spends like 3 hrs on one tag, losing track of time, and peace reminds me of the change in date. )

@ r.arata
if i'm wrong, you don't have to respond, but happy birthday!
if i'm right, you get a special surprise, so let's hope today belongs to you...~

( komaeda doubts it, and so that surprise remains his. )

( All it does is narrow down the suspects to "not anyone who's a freak living in the dorms" which is good.

But oh, wait. Good idea. )

Have you heard anyone who sounds like that person as of LATE?

[ ...ah

Maybe they are just fuel to each other's fire, building each other up in the worst of ways— it's a thought he's had many a time, bad luck stacked upon bad luck but it's times like these that he can't see it as such. Because he is very good at dying. And Komaeda, despite all odds, is very good at living. That's why he's the anchor, and why Rokkun is able to come back— he always comes back, fragments of a soul drawn to what makes it feel whole again. ]

I'll save you.

[Quiet, dipping his head against the crook of Komaeda's neck, arms about his waist, pulling him close.

The plan was always to save everyone, and he never did consider having to say goodbye, in the same way he never considers what he would do afterwards, how he would live the rest of his life, what he's going to do when it feels like he's carved out his heart and left it behind. Graduation comes first. Then everything in that nebulous future of inevitable goodbyes. ]

You'll be with me for every sunrise and every sunset. You'll be the reason I wake up each morning, and the reason I'll be able to fall asleep at night.

( he reaches out with his prosthetic h — ... he stops, and he chooses to walk on the other side of rokkun so he can reach with his organic hand, although pawed so he can hold rokkun's. )

Hm, I'll message you when I burn it, and tell you all about it.

( uhm... tbh he was going to light this bitch up and WHERE IS A FIREPLACE???

color him surprised, aside from that. he guesses he'll go one step further, linking their arms, and then holding rokkun's hand. )

...You haven't? ( ? maybe he doesn't remember that. ) Then aren't I lucky, then we can learn together...

( luckily the school is empty hopefully at this time so no one has to know anything, but he'll pull rokkun along, although his eyes seem to dart from one direction to another. )

( I just picked dragonflies because I like dragonfly jewelry, crying.

As she supposes, he doesn't suspect anything other than maybe she's checking for muggers or something; it's an action that suits her and he doesn't blame her for it. )

I'll be right afTER.

( ...

The prompt comes up on a scroll that appears out of nowhere, unfurling on the door like someone's eviction notice; it asks if she wants to leave, with YES or NO glowing faintly. When she selects YES—

And she's back to the same view she'd had before he'd turned things on, darkness over her eyes where the headset sits and the slim view of the classroom otherwise. Natsume stirs on the ground behind her, grimacing. In general, the feeling is like, when you sit still for like twenty minutes in a not particularly comfortable position; Maya can enjoy that too. "Enjoy."

She can also enjoy quiet as Natsume pushes his headset up so he can go power things down, head and heart turning over themselves as he stands there turned away from her. Ginger tea, to settle the stomach. For circulation. Because it's nice. )

...Are you feeling alRIGHT?

( Just checking. )

[ They would have cried, they think, a little jolt when Subaru touches their hair but they nuzzle his hand afterwards, to take as much comfort as possible. There was a time where everything reminded them of everybody and they couldn't bear it, but once they were able to pick themselves back up again... they surrounded themselves with books, with art, with people who have their brother's kindness, their sister's wisdom, their father's ... I couldn't think of anything, but I'm sure there's something.

But they get it. It doesn't stop the anxiety that claws at the back of the mind when thinking about losing someone, of being alone and surrounded by things but not the people they love, and it doesn't stop the tears that prick at their eyes, that dampen Subaru's shirt when they press their face against his chest, breathing him in.

But they get it. ]

We'll look up at the sky, and know we're still up there, even when we can't see each other. Right?

[ The first start fact that they learned from Subaru, and their favorite ]

[ asdflkhj sometimes the stars align

It's a relief to be back, for sure, but the disappointment of reality is there too, in a hard plastic chair and aching ears instead of a cool breeze and the smell of grass in the nighttime. She removes everything from her head as soon as she's able to, setting it aside and giving the console a more impressed look this time than her doubtful one initially. ]

I'm fine. How are you feeling?

[ Like he's going to throw up? Maya circles around him to see his face. As a precaution. ]

( He turns away sharply so she can't see him, feeling warm under the collar. Please don't look at him, he's still thinking things over, he's embarrassed. )

Just the SAME.

( ...he grimaces, closing his eyes again. He moved too fast and now he's regretting it; the lingering vertigo and nausea from the game isn't helping, either. )

A little SICK. I'll be FINE. ( breathe in, breathe out. Ugh. His stomach's doing flip-flops. ) Let's get some tea THEN.

( He'll come back for this later, they can just take their time making their way to the cooking room. )

[ He holds up two fingers, then points at his eyes and shakes his head. He knows the gardener is a spirit, but he can't see him. It doesn't really factor much into his Yogen experience, though, seeing as he and Maya go home well before dark and wouldn't be around to get eaten anyways. ]

Okay!

[ She follows after him and stands in front of the stairs. Subaru, please. ]

npc contact.2

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