npc contact.2

[adsum]

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As the game progresses, different npc faculty and students will become available for threading. To request a thread, please comment below with the name of the npc and the ic date in the subject header. Threads may be cut short due to mod availability, so please have a reason in mind for the interaction.

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[adsum]

[ What would the best of this place even be...? If it were the days of yore, he could have explained so much better, could have talked about his students and their accomplishments and how proud he was of them— how proud they were of themselves— when it finally came to graduation day and they would step out through the front gates one last time with a smile on their faces. ]

...It was not always this way. And I apologize for not having the power to turn back time, to return your soul back home, to all that you left behind. Many of the souls here are lost, confused, angry, scared... they have been here for so long already, unable to accept and let go. You will not be able to leave this place until you too are ready.

[mermaidcursed]

( someone please tell nene they're proud of her actually, she never hears it and she's doing really, really well in this murder school purgatory-- but why would she want noah to return to being a child soldier, for crona to go to wherever it was that was so awful that they think a- a corrupted? purgatory is a kinder world, see the people who've found love here split up? will those bonds be there when they....

when they graduate? god--

in kinder times, perhaps yogen wouldn't be so bad at all. learning she had died- remembering it- might have been awful, but she would... have time to grieve, at least. time to breathe. graduation wouldn't be a death race. nene thinks about the graduate last year. alone and cold and missing an arm. ... )

... It- it's not your fault. I don't blame you. You've been nothing but kind to me. ( even when he was out of control, and, you know. eating kids. it's. look she forgave yako she can forgive this, why did the supernaturals twist her morals so hanako this is your fault ) ... I wish I knew how it happened, if only because the last thing I remember was vowing to change my fate- I want to know what beat us. ... I... I don't want to change into someone else.

( and as she speaks softly, she raises one hand to look at it- her nails are still painted from movie night, by akira's hand. there's no scars or blemishes on the back, but she knows the palm has been left crimson red too many times since summer started. if she was to be reborn, what would happen? would she have a freckle or two on the back? it woldn't be her hand. )

But I already am, aren't I? The me before this- she didn't know anything about poisons, or stitching wounds. Or what it felt like to lose a brother... And I can't go back to that.

[adsum]

[ Kindness does not make one blameless, although Kazuki cannot say he had any direct hand in what happens here. ]

...No, you cannot go back to that. In your next life, or the next, perhaps you will grow up to be a gardener, or a teacher, or find yourself in a cat's body. You will not know, any more than you know who you used to be.

[ Not Nene Yashiro at all, but somebody else completely, living somewhere different in a different time. The hand she's staring at now is hers and hers alone.

There is little comfort to be gotten from nihilism, but it's still there in his voice, quiet and gentle. ]

Would knowing the cause of your death be any better? Whether it was orchestrated or by sheer accident, it does not change your being here.

[mermaidcursed]

( a gardener or a teacher... like. what she does here? she teaches stephanie and ishimaru to sew, hikaru to cook- she runs the gardening club, is constantly running around bringing more people into it. does... )

Does what we do here matter for what comes next? Do my actions in this place determine what I'll be?

( it's worth asking, honestly. her hand falls back down, grazing the spider lilies close by. )

... I don't know. But maybe I'm just tired of not knowing things. People don't tell me things, hide things. I- maybe it'd hurt too much, knowing, but I thought we could do it.

[adsum]

[ Like what she does here, and like what he... did and does, because it's easiest to draw example from experience. ]

Everything you do matters. It may not feel like it, but your time is but a drop in the ocean of your soul. The embrace of your mother when you were first born... the person you faced when you took your first steps... kind words exchanged with a stranger on the way to school... You do not remember such things, do you? Nor what you ate for supper exactly ten years ago from now, nor the color of the first pair of shoes you learned to tie. Memories gone in the next moment still matter.

[ Death and rebirth, an endless cycle of opening your eyes and closing them, never knowing anything, always having to relearn everything, it would be so easy to say that none of what happens here matters when everything's just going to be reset, but it does matter. It matters so much, and he needs Nene to know. ]

Little by little such things mold the soul, and yours is a compassionate and willful one, lass. When you move onto the next life, and forget everything that you did and saw and were, the soul you so carefully nurtured will not forget.

[mermaidcursed]

( nene... listens, quietly- her hands are still dirty so she avoids touching her clothes, and even if she's not actually sobbing anymore, tears still drop silently and slowly down her face, leaving the faintest hint of pink scales in their wake. maybe if they were having this conversation earlier, like. before she died, this sort of thing would sound nicer- sweeter, softer. but she also just learned she died, and doesn't know what to do yet. it's less idealistic philosophical talk and more a looking reality that's threatening to crush her. )

... How long have I been here, Kazuki-san?

( ... not that she expects him to really know. but... )

I- is getting ready, accepting all of this- is that what graduation is? Do we even have any say in what comes next?

[adsum]

Quite a while.

[ ...

anyways, ]

Graduation means different things for different people. But once they are ready, and they leave those gates, they do not come back. I do not know what lies beyond. But you needn't worry: when a soul is lost, the heart will guide it.

[mermaidcursed]

( she's quiet for a while after that, looking at the red spider lilies... were they guiding the souls that decided they'd had enough? )

... You said that... it wasn't always like this. What happened?

( because that is so much easier than focusing on- on her, and her dying, and she's going to have to tell hanako, how will he get back to where he's supposed to be? he can't put his goals on hold like this for her-

no. nope. school now. why is this now hell. )

[adsum]

Time passed. Things change. That is the way of the world, lass: cycles of peace and war should not be unfamiliar to your own experiences.

[ There are dark spots of humanity just as much as there are bright ones, but that's just how people are, especially in the microcosm of a school. ]

[mermaidcursed]

( ori i assure you if this was a middle school? there would have been even more deaths by now. we got off easy thank you for this mercy.

but kazuki's been up front with her on... a lot of things, answering in depth and gently. so if that's all he's willing to say on the matter for now...

nene sighs, finally rubbing at her eyes with the back of her hands. )

... Can... Can I stay here for a little bit?

( the 'with you' is unspoken- she's not ready to face the others yet. she told shin that he was just as alive as she was- told lucifer and inaba and noah and everyone else they would get out alive, get home, find new homes, find places to be and live and love. how is she supposed to look at them now? )

[adsum]

[ Stares into the sky about middle school... oh yeah, there would've been bloodshed day one. ]

You may stay as long as you want; you need not ask me permision. But it would be best if you turned in for the night, when it gets too late, or too cold. I would not be able to do much for you, then.

[mermaidcursed]

( shoutout to my middle school which had bars on some of the windows, but also a ddr machine. )

... Okay.

( there's still things she wants to do, say- sorry for drawing back when she knew that hanako wanted to do, show him how the seeds he's given her are coming along... but she's tired, her heart is heavy in her chest and her stomach feels heavier, her legs weak. when the chill of the night sets in further, she does get up, barely dusting the dirt off of herself... but instead of going to the dorms, she heads to the school.

she's not the only one tied to her fate, after all. )