yogen | npc contact.2

[subaru's cheek tingles from where they touched it, breath stopping a moment, he leans in briefly to it just before they drop their hand to poke at his ribs--

which he would normally pretend is a whole ordeal, totally broken, oh he is just so hurt but he remembers the last time he teased them when they weren't in a good mood, and also he still feels bad after his prank before. subaru's gonna pinch their bicep instead, mochi... as if these baby fists could hurt him.]

I'll survive! I've been in worse fights than this~.

[like he's... some kind of delinquent that picks them... actually he was so. he's reformedish.]

I didn't think you'd react that badly, though... [...] Is there someone that needs a good punch in the gut? I'll go after ghosts too, Keigo, just lemme know.

[ Their brows knit together in concern over the thought of Subaru getting into fights, because this isn't a high school punching and kicking is the extent of it, it would be guns and knives and magic even their strongest keychain charms can't fully protect a person from.

... ]

...you did it on purpose?

[well... maybe some of komaeda's better luck can rub off on him, and he'll survive it, so...

subaru glances away, then back to keigo with an sheepish, apologetic smile.]

Yeah. I wanted to surprise you, it just totally backfired on me~.

[surprises......... are not always good ☆]

So don't feel bad, 'kay? It's just karma~.

[ Don't feel bad? He did it on purpose? How can he smile like that...

...their bottom lip trembles, like they're about to cry, but then they draw back with gritted teeth and hands that reach for Subaru's wrists, holding him there so he can't turn away. ]

Why?! Why did you do that!? What "karma"— WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU!?!

[-- oh, whoa.

subaru looks taken aback at the raised voice, this isn't a keigo he's seen before, and -- he knew he messed up when it happened, but this is--]

Nothing, Keigo! I was just-- Look, I know it was my bad, okay? You hitting me was karma, so don't feel bad about hurting me! That's what I meant, okay? You didn't do anything!

[subaru won't turn away, for the record, he really has had worse in every sense, it just majorly sucks to be the cause of this]

If I did nothing, then why!? You scared me first!

[ They didn't do anything— hitting Subaru was his karma, he had it coming for him, the anger and humiliation and hurt they feel is justified, as is their taking a step forward and forcing Subaru to take a step back until his back hits the wall. ]

It's not funny! Never do that again or I'll hate you and I don't want to!!

[ I'm very sorry for everybody in the dorms having to hear them throw a temper tantrum at 6 in the morning, this is the price of communal living ]

[oh my god he's being bullied by someone like six inches shorter than him.

they're absolutely justified, subaru would never argue that, his back hits the wall and his hands lift only to surrender -- he gets it, he gets it]

Okay, okay! I promise, I won't! Seriously, I'm sorry Keigo, I really didn't mean to startle you so much, okay...? If I knew, I wouldn't have done it.

[... a beat, and he'll drop his hands down again, looking uncertain on this otherwise fine morning.]

I'm used to doing it to my friends back at Yumenosaki, and they get mad at me too, but-- [... there's something more important to ask, and he seems frustrated for a moment before it switches back to the uncertainty before.] Are you okay?

[ This is righteous fury, not bullying, ]

NO!

[ -—but whatever else they were going to say gets caught in their throat, because that wasn't the answer they were supposed to give, they were supposed to say they're fine and stomp off in a huff and maybe Subaru will come up to them later to apologize and everything will be fine again

but it's not fine, and it's not okay, and their eyes sting with tears even as they step away from Subaru, letting out a shaky breath.

...

The next words are quiet, almost a whisper, words for Subaru alone. ]

...the fourth floor... I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe... that's all I could think about...

[ Collapsed on the floor, thrashing and screaming but not being able to do either. The absolute terror of dying, when they haven't accomplished what they had set out to do. ]

[...

subaru steps forward, cupping their cheeks in his hands to wipe at the tears that fall from the action. he wishes he was shorter, or that keigo was taller, but

it's fine. he can't imagine what it was like, and to make those memories resurface... mm. he's already thinking of all the ways to make it up to them, whether it works out or not, because the last thing subaru ever wants to do his hurt those important to him.]

Keigo... [it's quiet too, and-- to be honest, he doesn't know exactly how to handle this, he's okay with general things but he's not sure if he's supposed to push or let go.

they're willing to open up, not to just pretend they're fine (a trick subaru knows so well himself), and so he considers what his friends would do.

...] There's not a lot of people who're up right now, but... do you wanna go someplace a little more private anyway?

[so they can still pretend to be fine for other people]

[ When their head lifts, so do their eyes, filled with shame and embarrassment more than anything, not even a smolder of the anger that sharpened their stare like knives just moments before.

Do they want to go somewhere else? They don't know. They have to open the shop, they're late, nobody is ever around there until closer to 8 anyways. They think about the space behind the counter, something thick and solid that can shield and hide them from the outside world. Retreating there would be as private a place as there could be.

... ]

Let's go to the library.

[ Sort of private. It's a place you have to keep quiet, even if the librarian isn't there yet to yell at you otherwise, and it's close enough to the shop to feel safe but isn't the shop— somehow, going back there, right now, feels like giving up. ]

[the library... subaru has spent more than one afternoon dozing there, surely, both when he was awake and when he wasn't; he remembers natsume's little ghost friend is there too, but she's... probably okay. yeah.]

Okay. [...] If you were a book, what would your genre be?

[and. he'll hold out his hand, though it seems a little hesitant, like he's thinking keigo won't take it. expecting they might not.]

[ They look up a little, thinking, thinking, standing still in place... But then they make their decision: ]

Anthology.

[ and takes Subaru's hand. ]

What about you?

[the physical contact is relieving and he wastes no time in taking more, locking their fingers together and pulling them along happily. he's actually keeping his voice at a normal volume.]

Adventure!

[probably. or maybe a sports...? coming of age type stuff...]

With a lot of cool fight scenes and magic and dragons, because they seem super cool... I feel a real kinship with those big lizards. An anthology is a collection of stuff, right? What're you a collection of?

[ There's not much interest from npckun at the mention of fight scenes and magic and dragons— apparently those aren't things they read much about, or existed in a teacher's study.

It was textbooks. Reference books, encyclopedias and how-tos and field guides, and then an anthology. Short stories written by different authors, with different characters and different settings and different themes, inconsistent and only able to be defined by what it is. ]

Oh... I don't know. Things I like. Things I find interesting. Bits and pieces that make up the whole.

Would I be in it?

[a selfish, indulgent question, not unlike "what do you like about me?" that night on their way to the stars. he's thinking, thinking, of what he can give them, he'll figure it out along with the other thing he wants to give them for sure]

You'd be in my story. A charming, helpful wizard with so many wares they have a wagon full of them. Not a drawn one, but like... A wagon with a window. Someone who had read so many books they were filled with all the knowledge in the land, but never had the chance to share it. I'd ask for you to join me, again and again and again, but I don't know if you'd say yes or no. You're a busy busy wizard, after all, with so much to do, and who'd want to live with a dragon?

[... they probably don't even know what a dragon is, so subaru makes sure to emphasize that people don't normally like dragons.]

Yes. [ quiet, but without hesitation ] You're the first person that I...

[ ...

They fall silent to listen, having just a difficult a time imagining a wizard as they do dragons, having an image of a wagon in their head but then Subaru said no horses and there's a window and now they aren't so sure they know what a wagon is either.

They're somebody who's read a lot of books and knows a lot— but how much of that knowledge is practical? There's books on get rich quick schemes, though. Books on how to handle interviews, how to build yourself up as more than you really are, how to appear confident and competent. But self-help books don't walk you though a panic attack, they just deal with the aftermath. There are no guides to making friends, or get along with people, or do normal things that normal people do.

...

...

sideglance at Subaru ]

What does a wagon— that's not a drawn wagon, but one with a window— look like? How does it move without horses?

[ Before anything else, answer them this, or it's going to keep them up at night. ]

[............................ he's gonna make them finish that thought even though his mind is between "thought about including" and something more teenage romance. but after he explains the wagon, i guess.]

It's uh... It's like...

[........... oh my god. he doesn't know how to describe it. hold on, he'll take out his pda to draw it. wait he has to let go of their hand for this. they're gonna link arms now so he can draw and still touch them.

here]

Like this? The thing in the middle is the window, you open it to greet customers and stuff! Also it moves with magic, 'course. Magic can do anything you want it to, as long as you've got an idea and the will to do it.

[ ...

...

well, they're no good with living things anyways, but the alternative being magic is kind of... ]

Do you think I would get more customers if I were a peddler instead of a shopkeeper?

[ Like if they go person to person and hound them until they buy something, instead of waiting for them to wander into their store ]

[embrace fantasy. it's better than this world's magic, probably. in subaru's story it is. the only it takes from you is your free time to master it.]

Probably, but it's not like you're in the red where you are. [they did say they were doing fine. he's trust them on that.] But I can make you a sign to wear if you answer a question for me.

[ Doesn't matter if they're not in the red; they need to do whatever they can to get ahead. It's what they tell themselves, even though it's the library that they turn their head towards when they make it to that hall.

... ]

What do you want to know?

[they can relax a little, in his mind. especially when there's not customers for the next two hours, which is two hours to monopolize. he'll open the door like a gentleman for them.]

I'm the first person...?

[from before... he's curious, tilting his head with a flicker of hope in his blue eyes.]

Uh-

[ NO they didn't want to finish the thought out loud, didn't even really have a concrete sentence but more of a ...vague concept of Subaru being their first a lot of things.

... ]

Yes.

[ Yes he is. That's all they're saying. ]

Keigo~.

[he's gonna latch more onto them... dragging them to a more secluded part of the library, maybe they can hang out between the aisles instead of at a table. surrounded by books and the quiet of morning.]

You can't just leave off like that~. C'moooon, I'm so~o curious...♪ Or maaaaaybe... I should guess. ♪

[which, sounds like the worse option somehow]

[ They open their mouth like they'd rather him guess, but it isn't like truth or dare where they can deny everything and nobody would be the wiser, and they're not taking turns, and there's no crowd to escape into with Subaru hanging onto them and nobody else in the library at this hour, just walls of books on either side and the faint scent of vanilla in the air.

... ]

You're the first person that I... mm...

[ ughhhhh ]

...hm...

[ ...

... ]

Guess.

[he hums thoughtfully, weighing down on them a little... the first person that they...

saw the stars with. that's an easy guess, from their reaction then... but it's not embarrassing enough. subaru's quiet as he lists through others (small things, like "showed triboluminescence"; bigger things, like "told the price of their contract to") and he can't help the grin that tugs at his lips. maybe there's even more than he thought, hidden away in that mind of theirs.

but none of that's gonna get a fun reaction, because they're true. so obviously--]

... Fell in love with? ☆

[he's teasing, light and playful.]

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