yogen | npc contact.2

Mmm...

[ Oblivious to the bloodlust, npc-kun tilts their head to look up at Komaeda, like how Lily does it but it works a lot better when you're doing it from behind. Either way, they have this giddy little grin on their face, because it isn't just a hug— it's being held, and it's different. Unexpected.

... ]

How are you going to protect my hope when you're totemed? I don't live in the void.

[ Who cares about interacting with void students when you have a cute shopkeep-kun in front of you? ]

[ crying, i'm glad the consensus is yes he is

anyways, it looks like this thread is after Natsume's so it's up to Alice whether he ended up planting chamomile for Komaeda to drown or not, but presumably most of the plants are indoors in the gardening club. ]

I gave him the means to grow his own stock. Whether you take or he shares is not up to me, but I have given what I can.

I'll have a year to do as much as I can.

( before it's too late, but those limitations have never stopped komaeda-arata, and he doesn't think he should let npc-kun think that too. )

Though, I believe in my luck... and if it manages to work in my favor, nothing will happen, and you'll have me... for a little while longer.

( until his cancer takes him — the way it slowly eats away at his brain, gnawing at what bit of sanity he has left along with his body. his hands remain onto npc-kun's body, not letting them go, because his body is stuck in the gesture, wondering how long he'll be able to stay this way. if he lets go, will that just be that? hm. )

...You can believe in it too.

Me too, I want to grow something too.

( he's going to walk away from what he's watering, then take a few steps over to his eyeless companion. )

What about limbs? I have a finger left.

( fear garden by kagamine rin. )

Yeah!

[ They oblige by sitting down, but then proceeds to flop over onto their back so they can keep staring up at the sky. Can't eat like this, but it's okay, food will be there but the stars— or whenever it gets quiet, they suppose, they and Subaru have to go back and they can't really see the sky from the little window in their shop.

... ]

Have you ever wished on a meteor?

[pfft. subaru leans back on his hands, munching on a sandwich.]

Y'mean a shooting star? Yeah, of course! They're really quick though. Haven't you?

[genuine question, not acting like it's something everyone should've done in their life. some people don't look, or even believe in it]

[ What sort of letters... Ideally, nice things about them, I love yous and I'm thinking about yous and the sorts of things you replay over and over again on the answering machine so you can hear somebody's voice long after they're gone...

... ]

Write to me about all the fun things you're doing. The people you meet and the friends you're making. It's supposed to be important to make friends.

Sure. That's the kind of letters I'll write then.

( on both counts, because he's getting the hang of how much attention they seem to enjoy now. )

You'll have to write back though. We'll be pen pals, so make sure you tell me about all the same things, 'kay?

[ Rokkun's ...like that... around Komaeda but as far as Akki knows, he hasn't let Komaeda know any of their plans either, continually refuses to let him be a part of it. Maybe it's because they're all idiots, and there's really no disagreeing with Rika on this one, especially with the grimace he makes at "watch you die 'cause you followed Rocchi into something insane" because... yeah.

Uneasy, Akki rubs at the back of his neck, because... yeah. Yeah. It's the feeling of being in too deep, you don't know where to begin asking for help. ]

I promise. ...You still owe me a favor; I haven't forgotten.

[ That he needed her for something, but it isn't the right time yet, and how it constantly feels like a waiting game. ]

...Can I ask you a question?

Huh? Hmm...

[ As long as they've been here, they remember Lucifer and maybe was blinded to everybody else to stay consistent with them stalking Clamor their first thread like they've never seen him before. But the school's got a long, long, history, and their group probably goes back just as far? ]

We get two sets at initiation, so we'd have the second set to wear while the first is in the laundry.

[ I would also save my cat over—-

anyways, the nurse just gives both of them a pleasant smile before waving them over to her door, though not without a finger to her lips as a reminder for them to talk quietly inside the office. ]

I'd like to think we're very good friends! I've known Mizuki for a long time, after all. [ "how long?" "a while" ] What are you two feeling today? Lemon ginger? Perhaps something with peppermint?

[ npc-kun mutters something about being able to correct these answers, but dutifully puts the folder away to swap for another, trying hard to keep their head still so Komaeda won't move his away.

What else are they confident in... Science. They open the green folder and see... science!! The universal constant. ]

Wow, they're pretty bad at this too.

It's actually despairing... maybe that's why they haven't came back to school.

( science, let's see, he wonders if it's plain science or... the most evil version: chemistry — which komaeda-arata's a rich boy, and attended hope's peak... half of these subjects don't apply to him. this is like the poor man's knowledge when he has to learn like... more important stuff. )

If we were given grades like this in my old school, they'd kick you out, and it'd be pretty pathetic...

( he reaches out to point at one of the topic on the paper. ) What do you think, he must've got stabbed for the right reason?

[ There's a little scrunch of the nose and eyebrows like he either wants to laugh or is disgusted at the idea, but he shakes his head with denial at the rumor. ]

[ hm

alright, he'll bite. following Komaeda down the stairs ]

You know when I heard, I didn't think you were capable of that...

( really, he was shocked, just the idea of hiro having that emotional capacity to go that far, but komaeda-arata was already aware of the little plan between them. he's going to pick up one of the bag of bugles that he brought, and slowly open it to hold out to hiro despite he already has a bag open. )

I'm sure your sister is pretty good at rejecting people, she denies me all the time! Ah, but that's because I'm usually nosing around in her business.

( ...

...

...

i just don't like it. )

You're like a lost puppy today, what's wrong?

[ Is he... he'd say he is either way, because either he's fine or he will be fine and there's no difference, even if he can't look Komaeda in the eyes and confirm.

He'll be fine, stubbornly looking towards the future like he always does, no patience for what ifs because otherwise he has to face that looming what if he doesn't graduate. ]

...No. If there's anything important, you can tell me. I don't know how you guys did what you did, but it's done.

[ A year, until graduation, when time is so short it hardly makes a difference— both are not enough time and they get it, a little, begrudgingly, why Komaeda is prepared to throw everything away to do everything he can while he still has the chance. It's a thought that makes them squeeze him a little tighter, because... luck is so hard to believe in. Chance. It's the opposite of control and what they try so hard for. ]

...I want to.

[ But it's so hard to give yourself up when you have nothing to begin with. ]

When it comes to what we saw, everything was important... from start to finish.

( the beginning with darkness and the lights that was meant to guide them, and the fall that placed them in the forest... one thing after the other, whatever made rokkun's dream, to komaeda-arata... that's important. he's incapable of saying it aloud, but being here right now to speak with the other is a show that he's willing for him. )

Some parts are more important than others, but... it's difficult to say them if you do that.

( he takes away his hand from rokkun's cheek, bringing it back to his own lap. )

We're supposed to be speaking to each other, so I want you to look at me... unless I'm that disgusting to you now, then I understand.

[ Kazuki looks conflicted, like he's imagining Komaeda with a thumb and no other fingers on his hands. ]

Humans grow in much the same way plants do. They need fresh air and water, healthy food, sunlight in moderate doses.

Meat.

[ stares at the sky ]

Although, it would not be accurate to say I was ever "alive," in the way you are. Has nobody told you what I am?

[ looks off to the side trying to remember the difference between a meteor and a shooting star and a comet and an asteroid, but this isn't their area of expertise

so they sit up instead, reaching for a sandwich themselves and lifting the top slice of bread a little to see what's inside ]

I've never seen one before.

...No, they haveN'T. The little owlet refers to you as a scary ghost THOUGH, and Komaeda-san claims he's seen you try to eat Saihara-kun beFORE.

( but kazuki has been reasonably nice to natsume, and also hasn't tried eating him, so. )

( wasn't it npc-kun who told komaeda-arata the hard facts that he wouldn't graduate, and now it's solidified in his mind that his person has to be used for something greater. he's fine with that, his life has always been that way, so it doesn't feel like he's throwing it away as long as it's for hope. npc-kun may be weak over this now, upset, worried, and doesn't know how to handle the loss further down the line —

but komaeda rocks them to one side, and then to the other, slow... easy... like he would do a child younger in age. how he would handle the children when they threw fits, when they allowed him to show some kind of affection even though whether he meant it or not was debatable. )

...It's a miserable talent, and it's useless to the people around me, but... if you can hope for the best regarding it, maybe it'll do good things for me.

( ... he chuckles breathily. ) I'll outlive your totems, but that's only if you believe in it.

( and komaeda-arata never counts on his talent, he hates what it can do, and has done... nothing good for anyone, but maybe for npc-kun, it can do this one thing. )

npc contact.2

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