yogen | npc contact.2

[ He won't, because npckun said so ]

It's alright, because your place is with me.

[ His "honesty" hurts other people, ever think about that, punk ]

You said they live on the ground, so I figured as much... What else do you know about Luzons? Tell me everything I need to know to make sure we build something they like!

( the way amami is whipped for npckun... sighs, wish komaeda has someone whipped. anyway, he doesn't think that's how it does — having a place, it's more like he's here until hope has prospered, and then he moves on. )

They're monogamous, and when they make their calls... it's an extended "coo" that raises in pitch in the middle...

( if only these were interesting, but they're like an endangered species. and when did honesty hurt someone!??! )

...Territorial creatures, so we have to hope only one comes around, because they'll fight to the death once they choose a location.

CooOOOoooo...

[ Just to try it out. ]

If they're monogamous, then maybe it's okay if there's two? So it doesn't have to live all alone.

...It would be lonely even if we interact with it.

( he laughs at npckun's attempt, the little cooOOOoooo probably means something in their language, and he finds that with enough practice, the bird and them could communicate. )

I wonder if we can get a pair, maybe family... or like us! A father and their child... but they'd probably do a better job than me.

( will they get two luzons, the thought of it makes komaeda reach over to the wood trying to put it together without having the tools. ) Would it go like this... coooOOOooooo....

Hm~ I don't think anybody could do a better job than you!

[ Rock bottom standards, but their own father failed them? So Komaeda still ranks pretty high up there in terms of father material.

Grinning, they set the pieces of wood down on their lap and cups their hands around their mouth. ]

CooooooOOOOOooo...

[ sounds more like an owl than a Luzon but they're trying. Copying Komaeda's coos as best they can. ]

( komaeda will try to put them together, which takes a large amount of focus to do — he's placing them together, using memory than the cheat sheet that would tell him what to do. when it seems like he's found the perfect fitted end, he'll grab a few nails to try and place them in the proper area, leaning forward to squint before turning to npckun to hammer the area. )

You think so...? I want to make you happy, even though I have a penchant of ruining a smile around me.

( he laughs because it's funny, he wants to see everyone get together, smile, be happy, but he always does the opposite. now being told he could have father of the year is exciting, you know? )

Hammer this part down, cooooOOoooOOooooOOOooo — wheeze — woooOO.

[ It's easy to win father of the year when you have no competition ]

You make me happy even when I'm not smiling. No matter how many times you ruin it, you put it back, so it's okay.

[ They pick up the hammer and tap tap taps the nail into place, careful to shoo Komaeda's fingers out of the way before making the final strike. Imagine cooing noises under their breath the entire time. ]

You said your father is... was... a teacher, right? He would have died before you, so he's here, isn't he?

( well, not like it's a cat that was in the bag, but since they're on the topic, he'll look towards npckun because inquiring minds would like to know. even if komaeda knows the answer, he's interested in the other's thoughts.

he moves his fingers to avoid getting them smashed, and sometimes they linger too long.

... )

Hm... good child! Coooo!

( like the good girl bird. )

[ ...They can't help but smile at being called a good child because ugggggghh how they've wanted to hear that from anybody for so long. The hammering slows a little, though, in trying to figure out how to explain their dad. ]

Mm... It was just me and dad for a couple years, but one day he never came home. I don't know what happened to him. Maybe he's dead, maybe he didn't want me anymore. I don't know.

[ Dead, hopefully, as hurtful as it is to wish such a thing upon one's parent. But he'd just never came home, just like how Aniki never came home, except this time there was nobody to return home and bring the news back. ]

( good child, a phrase komaeda's never heard himself considering how much of an ill omen he is. saying it to npckun however feels different though, it's because komaeda wants to give them everything he's never gained. he wonders if he would have smiled too if his parents gave him the time of day, maybe his smiles now wouldn't be so empty, but it's fine if npckun smiles for them instead — as long as they can be happy. )

...So you were alone? At one point of your life, it was just you?

( in that cabin with no one else, empty sounds, their own thoughts and heartbeat in the background. )

...What did you do, after?

More than just a point.

[ They wish it were just a point, but instead it was a swath, up until they...

... ]

I did what I could. Eventually, the bills weren't getting paid so everything got shut off. Even the landline, and I couldn't talk to Anego anymore.

[ ... ]

So I left home and sold crack and now I'm here.

...Your life really isn't eventful.

( not the crack story, well, komaeda won't poke holes in it, he already has his reservations on how it was told to him — who stabs in crack? people get shot! )

Why didn't you ask to stay with her before your landline was cut off?

[ Yeah it's a real boring life ]

Mama left because I was born. I can't ask to live with her and Anego.

That's not true.

( that's a lie, he recalls that there was... a voice on the answering machine that was their mother, or whatever hinata had told him about. )

She called you to check on you every day, didn't she?

Huh? No.

[ There was a voice on the answering machine; Hinata did not lie. ]

Think back, to when you were three...

( think back like a [redacted] year old can do that, but npckun doesn't have dementia so komaeda can believe. )

...Hm.

( komaeda thinking who can be npckun's new mom. )

[ They think back to when they were three...

that was the year aniki died...

...

... that's basically all they remember ]

By the look on your face... you didn't remember what I wanted you to.

( hm, how can he explain this. )

Maybe she died, so that's why you stopped getting calls.

[ ...

"your mom's probably dead" IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MAKE THEM FEEL BETTER
I mean, like... her being dead is better than her abandoning them but at the same time it's worse ]

Okay... by that expression, you weren't too fond of that.

( UHMMMM. hm, now he's trying to think of how to make this better. )

She probably died of heartache not being able to get you and your brother back.

( ... )

[ How is this better when it's the same guess but worse. Maybe he should stop smiling at the hypothetical death of their mother ]

...It's okay. I'm not going to think about what if I got to live with mama and Anego. It's not what happened, anyways.

[ And they have to do their best not to look at the past. To face forward and do what they can where they are now. ]

Hm... It sure isn't. Look where you are, sitting next to me... making bird houses, and hoping two birds fit into it.

( he'll lean against them, bumping their shoulders as if he wants them to cheer up.

it's fine if their mom is dead, and komaeda can't remove his smile... no... but he does place the wooden pieces together for them to hammer at. )

Do you remember what your parents look like?

[ npckun hums and leans against Komaeda, deciding to take his words to mean "it's okay, because you're in a better place now" ]

Dad was... very tall. [ though adults tend to be, when you're a child ] He smiled a lot, but not like how you do it. I don't remember Mama... Aniki says I look more like her than my dad, though.

...

( oh, he sure is tall. for a moment, komaeda's twirling his hair to push it behind his ear!!! not bc... haha 6'1" with the counselor degree... how funny. )

...And how do I smile?

( says as he smiles now, completely oblivious to what that means. )

You are cute, so I believe your mother must have been as well...

( maybe, komaeda doesn't like looking at ugly people people hopefully aniki did NOT lie. )

[ It's what's on the inside that counts... and aniki hates his dad's guts ]

Hehe... I'm really cute, right? You smile for other people, but when dad smiles, it's for himself. That's what it feels like.

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