yogen | npc contact.2

I'm going to yell at him next time I see him.

[UGH he's gonna steal some of their food. punishment for cuteness.]

Keigo~, don't do that! Maddy won't change how he treats me, probably, but also if you do let me watch 'cause I think it'd be fun to see how he'd react.

[ NO they're going to eat out of his plate, in that case. It's a communal plate now. ]

...I've yelled at him before. He does what Tarou-nii does: he smiles and laughs and tries to make me feel better.

[ Why can't you guys cry like normal people ]

[oh my god why can't you be cute and feed him back!!!!]

Oh, that's probably 'cause they're used to being yelled at. When you've had enough people shouting stuff at you, you sorta learn to smile and deal with it.

[...]

They don't want you to be upset with them, so they'll try what they can to make you feel better. ♪ It's how they show they care, s'all!

[ asfdlkjh because they only know how to take, not to give...

They do feel bad when Subaru phrases it like that, though it's hard to imagine people yelling a lot at Amami. Komaeda, maybe. But it's not like they're any different with the smile they wear and the way they act around people who make them nervous, like they have to preemptively head off any shouting that's going to happen by not giving them the chance. ]

It's not like I'll hate them forever... Even if I get mad, I could never not love them. It's the same with you, so it's okay if you don't smile.

[stop... we'll learn to give together. he'll teach keigo how to be a cute boyfriend. through examples that he's seen in mao's shoujo mangas. not the main love interests but like, the childhood friends who are very friendly and cute and left to the wayside which is such a shame because they are the the better option every time than the brooding jerk boy who has a heart of gold but only for you]

I won't smile if you yell at me, or pretend I'm okay with it or anything~. I'll still wanna make you feel better though, 'cause I want to be the reason you smile instead of the opposite. ♪ You're the same way, right?

[ both of them like Wakamatsu in GSNK referencing shoujos ]

Yeah! When somebody smiles and I know I'm the reason, that feels soooo warm!

[ It makes them feel like they're doing a good job. They're getting a good grade in making people happy or however the meme goes

but it really does feel like that, for them who is always seeking love and affection, and to make somebody genuinely smile from the bottom of their heart is one of the clearest signs of love. ]

[STOP THAT'S LITERALLY GOING TO BE THEM!!!! HOW ELSE ARE A PAIR OF FIRST TIMERS TO KNOW WHAT TO DO, ADVICE POSTS IN THIS SCHOOL ARE ABSOLUTE SHIT]

Exactly! You get it! It's so nice...☆

[they're a lot alike, in a lot of different ways, and not all of them good. but keigo is infinitely more honest than subaru, even if subaru tries not to do what amami and komaeda do when it counts, so

there's a lesson to be taken, and he'll try his best. he has to learn to give a little too, after all.]

The first time I got my mom to smile again, I felt amazing... I wanted to be able to do that over and over, so I did -- until she was able to smile without me having to do anything at all. Not a bad accomplishment for a kid, huh?

[ They're going to ask Komaeda and follow his advice maybe, we'll see how things turn out, it's tough when you try to crowdsource but it's the same pool of people ]

Yeah... [ ... ] Was she okay?

[please don't ask the romance novelist for advice]

She's okay now.

[his smile remains, but it's that same sort of one he had back during their first stargazing -- a little subdued, a little quiet. the same sort he had talking about "normal" memories in trade for a happy one.

...

a sheepish sort of grin, pushing their food around distractedly.]

Um~, I'm not really good at talking about stuff like this... [because it gets him feeling somber and lonely and sad and then that makes the other person somber and lonely and sad and he doesn't like that--] But you shared a little about your brother and all, so I wanna do the same. It's not fair that I keep asking so much about you and I don't give anything back, right?

[ "now" but not before... npckun thinks back on how they talked about their brother and it was only ever that he was 1) dead, and 2) loved. One is a simple fact and the other was all good things, so comparing the two wouldn't be fair. ]

...It's okay if you don't want to talk about it. There's plenty I never want to talk about. I think sharing the things you want to share is fine.

[it's fair enough to subaru, who's two things about his dad have been 1) busy and 2) loved, the first a simple fact and the rest good things. subaru wonders how to put it, then, his small desire...

... maybe just saying it outright is fine, since he's the same way about sharing laws anyway.]

I want you to ask me about stuff, though, even if I might not answer. I want you to want to learn about me as much as I want to learn about you, Keigo.

[so even if it isn't about "before" or anything like that... he wants keigo to be curious about things relating to him, even the things subaru doesn't want to talk about -- subaru's curious about more details on things keigo doesn't want to talk about too, after all, even if he won't ask.]

[ Hmm... mm... They're quiet, trying very hard to think of a question to ask Subaru, but it's hard to find a genuine one that isn't a leading question for a sales pitch.

...

... ]

I still want to hear about everything you did when you were gone.

[ Experiences and how they're retold tell a lot about a person, they think, and there's nothing wrong with starting from now and working one's way back. ]

[how....... much can he tell them...............]

Okay, but you've gotta promise me something first.

[ That's such an alarming lead-in ]

Am I going to be mad at you?

Not a doubt!

[he has done some things that will make keigo mad.]

[ Hm ]

I won't hate you forever, but I'll be mad. What else am I promising?

[...

he won't throw amami under the bus...]

That's all~. So you don't gotta promise anything. ☆ What do you wanna hear first: how I stole from the rich to give to the poor, kept some poisons from ne'er-do-wells, about the talismans Maimai taught me, about the marketplace Ama-chan and I frequented... Oh, there was a lot of fun buildings to do parkour on too, I liked that a lot~. I made a lot of friends there too!

[mostly animals but-- he got friendly with the locals, naturally, once he got into the swing of the way things were.]

You stole from the rich? Why'd you give it away?!

[ They're poor! He could have given them the money!! He knows they need the money and this is the only thing out of everything Subaru's listed that they think he'd think they'd be mad about. ]

I did keep some of it, Keigo, but...

[he sighs, resting on his empty hand.]

Turns out we couldn't bring any souvenirs back. That's why the only gifts I've got for you are stories, see... And after I went through so many vendors just to find something you might like.

[ hmm SOUNDS FAKE ]

What sorts of things did you find for me?

Mostly books, 'cause I know you like to read them.

[... so many books... and one keigo will never, ever hear about...]

I wasn't sure what ones you'd really dig, but I got you some history ones, some ones on plants 'cause the pictures were pretty, and some poetry books the guy really sold me on once he heard I was shopping for someone I loved~.

I can't believe you fell for that... that's the same tactic I use, telling people to buy stuff the people they love will absolutely love.

[ You can't be blindsided by sales pitches, Subaru, please, they thought he'd know better, he hears that sort of thing from them all day ]

[of course he's heard it all before... but he understands why people let themselves be swayed, looking at keigo and thinking about how bright their eyes might've been reading through the books he would've brought back. subaru's expression now -- warm and tender and full of affection -- would've been the same if it'd been possible, except keigo would've had their nose stuck too far into a book to see the soft grin subaru offers.]

You were all I could think about looking at them, so I really didn't mind falling for it.

[ They can see it now, though, and even though it's such a cheesy thing to hear it makes them smile anyways, even if the association is just "oh a shopkeep salespitch" --> "my shopkeep" ]

Silly... I like books you can learn from! Poetry is harder. You'll have to read them to me.

[ Not like being read to makes it easier to process. Poetry is just something that feels like it's meant to be read by one person to another ]

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