yogen | npc contact.2

[ They go back to settling against the front of the counter, back sliding down the surface until they're sitting with their knees drawn to their chest, so they can look anywhere but at Natsume when they speak. ]

I made a wish to be with my family again.

[ ... ]

Then I picked up a knife, and drove it into my heart.

( Natsume peeks out from behind his arm... and replaces it again, wishing blindness would take him sooner so he doesn't have to see Any kind of amusement at his embarrassing circumstances. )

...It's FINE. I sometimes forget that I'm considered "alive" HERE, despite what we all ultimately and actually ARE. ( It's fine to get a reminder........ it is. ) I'll just stay on the ground for NOW, Kazuki-san, unless you have any tricks to teach me to stay aWAKE.

( a pause, watching him eat that chip, and amami sighs. )

Is it supposed to be? Unless you're talking about how I ended up here, but I wouldn't get too ahead of yourself on that one — I don't intend for it to happen again.

( it will if it has to, mind you. if the situation comes up again. that shouldn't happen though. )

( He doesn't know what he expected, but that isn't it; he stares at the shopkeeper, words lost.

Did you get your wish? he wants to ask; but he wants to ask Is that your contract? and Is that why you're peddling wares?, too, and in the end, he moves to the front of the counter to lean against it too, remaining standing but looking down at the shiba inu plush with a frown.

He puts it on their head and holds it there. )

It takes a lot of conviction to do something like THAT.

( Some people might say courage, some people might say desperation, but Natsume says conviction because it's true. He has a few other thoughts, mostly unkind, but he keeps them to himself. )

Are you working to make that wish of yours come TRUE?

Sort of...

[ A noncommittal answer, and one smothered in the plush that they bring down from their head and press their face again. If Subaru smells tears on this later, they can say it was Natsume. ]

There was no conviction, though— I was scared. I— My heart hurt so much, and I... I didn't know any other way to make it stop hurting.

[ So they carved it out. Or tried to. ]

( There are plenty of people who hurt and hurt and feel cold from the loneliness inside and out of them, and who still never even try to do something as (stupid, foolish, useless) drastic as that.

So: conviction. )

Most people go to therapy or find a home in other peoPLE. ( just a note, but neither of those are easy. especially if, maybe, they were still in that cabin he remembers. ) I...

( ...it isn't the same, so he shuts his mouth and closes his eyes. )

Did you stop its hurTING?

...No.

[ It still hurts, and it feels like it always will. But, after a pause, they lift their head and look up at Natsume with wet eyes. ]

But now I can do something about it. I can make it stop.

[ !!!!! ]

I want to come with you! I want to watch!

[ Stay here or be with someone? The choice is obvious ]

He was... very kind, and very brave, and very smart. He could do anything! But he always had time to play with me.

[ He was the best!! essentially. Even now, however many years (decades? centuries?) later, she still speaks of him with such warmth and affection that maybe it's only a concept that she remembers. But it still speaks a lot when the lingering memories you have of a person are ones filled with love and safety. ]

He said he would come back for me. He's never broken a promise before...

[ It was very embarrassing and she looks more embarrassed at missing Kokichi's company than she does being fed baby corn. ]

...I didn't used to. But I have no choice but to accept it now, do I?

[ghosts... are lonely ☆ he gets it, he's gonna visit her like every other day before school even once he can't see her anymore and leave little gifts at the shrine he's gonna make her.]

Okay! Let's go then, Harupyon~.

[he... does not know if ghosts can hold hands! but he's so used to offering them when he goes anywhere now that haruka's getting his free one]

[ There's a little distressed face he makes at Natsume telling Kouji he's been stabbed, but it relaxes when Natsume continues to assure him that he wouldn't have snitched.

...Shifting backwards, Hiro links his two pinkies together in the sign of a promise, then flips his hands around to hook his thumbs together, fingers splayed out to flap slowly like a bird taking off as he lifts his hands. Something about a promise, something about freedom. ]

Ngh-

[ WHY why this, don't make me have to write Rokkun being all hot and bothered by the kisses that make him weak and the stab of pain on the side of his next that makes his breath hitch— it's not fair, having this being turned around on him and not being able to reciprocate. ]

...I do what I want. You know that.

[ He's had a lot of time to practice, having lived and died in hell school countless of times, but it's still... it's nice having hard work be acknowledged for once, as opposed to Komaeda going on about how talentless he and everybody else are. ]

Thanks... It's not an assignment, though. I'm just passing the time while I think. [ And he's not telling Subaru what's on his mind, so he moves right along ]

Did you need something?

[ Ghosts... are lonely. There is no npc here that is actually not lonely, but being a rarely seen ghost is at least an obvious reason why Haruka is so eager to come up to Subaru and take his pinky, which immediately goes ice cold when she wraps her fingers around his one.

She's going to tug him towards the stairs instead of the elevator, though. It's something she's never seen before in her life and she doesn't quite trust something that can move on its own. ]

You can give me control just this once besides... ( it's komaeda, what would he do that rokkun wouldn't want?

it's different from when they're locked in dead silence, so he can actually hear the other. that's why komaeda stops for a moment, smiling softly so the other can see it. sure!! it was impulsive of him!! the area will heal up soon enough, and then he pouts what a quick change in expression...

is he really pouting, or is he playing (yes) to hover his own lips over rokkun's thoughtfully, but he won't lean forward if the other is against it. )

...I know you're excited to get rid of me on the upcoming month.

Who says that...? I've never heard them crying.

[ It's with a concerned look on their face that they look back up at the canopy of flowers above them, and no matter what, all they can feel while sitting below is peace. That despite the number of people who have come and gone in their life, the thought of them still being here, watching over them, is nothing short of comforting. ]

...I like it here. It makes me feel as if I'm not alone.

[ Sometimes you have to push your friends off a cliff if they won't jump, but that doesn't stop Akki from being wildly apprehensive about the notion of being pushed before he's ready. ]

Maybe. It doesn't stop the choice between infinity and oblivion from being so hard, though.

CooOOOoooo...

[ Just to try it out. ]

If they're monogamous, then maybe it's okay if there's two? So it doesn't have to live all alone.

It's just my imagination, don't you think it add a little flair?

( spices things up even though it's pushing it, even though it's the people that's died above them, and one of them are saihara, and komaeda frowns slightly. one of them are also rika, and his mouth twitches a bit, and then he wonders who will put up with him now. not that people don't put up with him, but it was a little different... those types of people are rare — reckless where others aren't, a third option when people see one or the other. )

...Isn't this tree dying, what will you do then...?

[ ............ ]

I've been staying hanging out in the common room, and you know how people are.

[ Completely off their rocker. Natsume being smiley angry is very reasonable, hopefully. [

[ "I like to bloody my hands" yes, Komaeda. He knows ]

...How would that even look? You'd give him tusks, and cover him in mud?

I have heard a great many thoughts of what becomes of the dead. Everything from the stars in the sky to the very air that we breathe, an essence that surrounds us and guides us so that our loved ones will forever be by our sides.

[ Everything from always being here, to not being anywhere, ever again. ]

...It would be lonely even if we interact with it.

( he laughs at npckun's attempt, the little cooOOOoooo probably means something in their language, and he finds that with enough practice, the bird and them could communicate. )

I wonder if we can get a pair, maybe family... or like us! A father and their child... but they'd probably do a better job than me.

( will they get two luzons, the thought of it makes komaeda reach over to the wood trying to put it together without having the tools. ) Would it go like this... coooOOOooooo....

That's a great idea, actually, do you have props here? Like a theater club or anything?

( akki's been here longer than komaeda, so maybe they had a forbidden club with forbidden props. )

As for the mud... He dirties his own hands, so it's fine. ( ... ) Are you fine being the wombat? We can change your animal...

( tug, tug on the leash, but that stays. )

npc contact.2

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