yogen | npc contact.2

( sighs... crossing his arms. he should already know, but maybe he needs help. )

Close your eyes.

[ What's with the sigh...

He closes his eyes ]

( he'll get on his knees and scoot closer so he can try and sit in rokkun's lap if he... LOWERS HIS LEG.

...

...

wraps arms around his neck...

...

...

gives him a kiss on the cheek. )

[ He can sit on half his lap... but the leg lowers when Rokkun realizes what he's trying to do, eyes opening at the warm weight around his neck and glancing over at the kiss on his cheek that he could delude himself with any number of meaning.

... ]

What if... I'd rather remember this?

[ Him tilting his head and leaning forward to kiss Komaeda on the lips, because he'd much rather remember something shared ]

( don't get komaeda wrong, that was just bait at first, he was getting there... slowly, but surely, but he should have known rokkun couldn't be patient. it's unfair he doesn't take his time, relish in the affection, but it's not like he can do that himself, and komaeda's eyes slowly close as he leans into the kiss. this was the idea, if he can't remember anything else about him in the coming future, perhaps an exchange that took months and months to even see the light of day again would be what brings him back.

his heart tightens in his chest, though, and he breaks the kiss so he can part his mouth, inhale, as he looks down at the other. )

...

( he'll lean down, lightly licking at rokkun's bottom lip just to catch any saliva because komaeda knows himself when he kisses, but luckily there's none. he wasted his time with the action, and so he can lean back properly. )

Will you be able to remember that kiss?

[ It's an action that leaves him chasing, though, breath held like he doesn't want to let the last of it go, like by doing so he can calm down and stop his heart from pounding in his ears, so loud that it drowns out even the white noise.

... ]

Mm... Maybe you should show me again. Longer, deeper, until it's burned into my soul.

There's... other ways to be connected to the soul.

( the way i could say he rocks into rokkun's lap because god is holding my hand, so instead he's able to give the other a pair of bedroom eyes... he's teasing through before he settles his hands on rokkun's shoulders, and rather than leaning in... he's pushing himself up.

what rokkun said must be true, they're all dead here, so it could be burned into his soul, but giving him everything at once will only spoil him. he's already a dog when thrown a tasty sphenoid bone, he doesn't let go because it belongs to him. anyway, once he's standing up properly, he closes his eyes for a moment because of the sun, and he'll open them slowly to look down at rokkun. )

...The heat is horrible, I'm going back to class now.

( new topic... new topic. )

[ oh thank god
ori thoughts, not rokkun thoughts, his are sort of the opposite, they're like... thoughts of other ways to connect to the soul but it's not school appropriate ]

...Yeah, you're looking pretty red. Better get inside.

[ He contemplates going back to class too, but there's stairs and the white noise in his head and it's not worth it so he's going to cut class, byeee. ]

( please STOP I'M SICKKKKKKK.

calling komaeda red makes him wonder if he is, and quickly his hands reach to his own cheeks to see if he's flustered or not, he can't tell, but he looks away when doing so. he's not, right? he has nothing to be flustered about right now... he thinks. he pushes away the bang that tickles his nose to the side to play off the fact that he didn't touch his cheeks just to check the temperature. )

...

( he thinks he's fine, but he doesn't look towards the other as he stares at the school instead. should ask him to walk komaeda to class, actually, )

Walk me to class.

( come on horndog. )

[ stop, the fact that this is an early october thread kills me ]

...If you help me up.

[ He holds his hands out ]

( stopp yday i was thinking about did they really live like this for a month, i'm crying. changes the date so its later in the month )

You're so needy, I can help, though...

( he walks over looking at his hand first, and with his prosthetic because that's the only one komaeda ever properly uses with him, he'll wrap his fingers around rokkun's own. with a light tug, he'll try to help him up, up up. )

Come on...

[ In my head it's later in the month, we can pretend

He wanted to say something about needing Komaeda, being needy, nothing quite works out trying to phrase the thought so he doesn't and just takes Komaeda's hand to pull himself up, leaning his weight on his good leg and pushing off on his knee with his other hand. Can't wait until he's morphined up and can sit and stand without hurting. ]

( us moving it to like the last week of october.

komaeda doesn't know what's going on in rokkun's head, so maybe that's for the best but as soon as the other is up, he looks him over one good time. he keeps his hold onto the male's hand, not moving because he wants to know what rokkun chooses to do — his reactions are always recorded in komaeda's book (in his head), and so even after something like this... he wonders if the other will let his hand go, or if he'll just walk without saying anything. everything feels so sensitive, and what are the chances something bad may happen, they've been fine right here so far.

part of him doesn't want to leave, but... )

...

[ yeah

He's not going to let go of Komaeda's hand— he never does, whether it's metal or organic, they're both a part of him he wants to hang onto for as long as he can— giving him a little tug to get him walking towards the court gate. ]

( he is always holding his hand...

...

...

komaeda stares down at their hands as he takes a step after the other, following him. )

What's it like being a virgin?

( conversation. )

I'm not.

[ I don't want this conversation ]

( LSJKDJLKJDLKSLJKDSLKJDLKJSDKLJ IM IN TEARS HELPPPPPPP )

Did that person die?

( better part of the conversation. )

[ He opens his mouth to correct something but decides he'd better not and just answer the question ]

Eventually. Probably.

So it wasn't us...? Hm...

( bold claim for a dying man, but you know, he was trying to learn. )

[ glances down at Komaeda's wrist, looks back up

... ]

( follows his eyes, looks back up.

... )

...Did you die while I was thinking of England?

What?

[ STOP he doesn't know the idiom, I hate that the two things I've learned from Yogen are thinking of England and what tulpas are ]

( i'M CRYING PLEASE. im so glad i think we all learned something new coming to yogen. )

I asked did you die in the middle of it? On your back?

( ... )

[ how do I unlearn things ]

...I've died a lot. Probably on my back, sometimes. I don't always realize what's happened, before I wake up again.

( how do you explain did you die in the middle of fucking as the question, and rokkun was on his back, but komaeda sort of just looks at him because he has died plenty of times.

if only i could unlearn this. )

...

( let's go of his hand, and attempts to pull his hand off so he can walk behind rokkun instead. wraps arms around his waist from behind. )

Hm...

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