npc contact.2

[adsum]

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[adsum]

[ ...

Everybody is hiding something. Just because theirs is what it is doesn't mean they're inclined to share, even with arms around them, cheek atop of their head, that feeling of safety where they could spill their heart out to Komaeda and he'll spin some hope bullshit to make it all better.

... ]

Make as much money as I can before graduation.

[commences]

What will you buy? That you're so focused on...

( he keeps himself attached, not so he can wring out secrets, but what's that compared to natural honesty? that's all komaeda has to give, all he knows anyway. )

You must hate me... or maybe there's nothing I can do in regards to it as to why you're so silent... hm...

( yet, he looks down the hall as he stops, causing npckun to stop walking too. )

...I am that much of a disappointment.

[adsum]

[ ...

They look up to meet his eyes. ]

There is nothing you can do. But it's not your fault. And it's not just you.

[commences]

You won't let me do anything, but you can tell me what you're buying.

( he pauses. )

Just between us.

[adsum]

No.

[commences]

...You want me to feel hopeless, even though I love you enough to do what must be done.

( a hard no, but not one that's easily accepted. oh no, oh he pulls away now, arms crossed as he looks off to the side thoughtful.

he gets it.

but that doesn't mean he's happy. )

[adsum]

[ He can look away, but as long as they don't let go, it doesn't matter. ]

Don't put words in my mouth. I want you to believe in me and my hope. How am I supposed to grow if I have you as a crutch?

[commences]

...Hm.

( don't put words in their mouth, and komaeda chooses to do what he pleases. )

I want to help hope no matter the risk, even if it means that I have to...

( he pauses, thoughtful. normally a person's hope is easy to understand, but it has been the unknown with them, so he asks again directly. )

What is your hope?

[adsum]

I hope you'll stop butting in. This is my hope; I'm not sharing.

[ Stop being so greedy!! ]

I want to do this myself... it's important to me that I can do this on my own.

[commences]

You don't have to share your hope with me, but what it pertains to is a different story. Because that hope is not my hope, but my job is to...

( his hope is something else, well, anyway! )

Is it because you won't know if I'll be mad with your as to why you're buying this specific "hope", what a shame...

( stop! komaeda is greedy, and he's also not! he's doing what he can... )

[adsum]

[ Well, do something else! god, he's such a helicopter parent ]

If I don't tell you, you'll be curious and you'll stick around.

[ That's why people keep secrets, surely, to trick other people into staying. ]

[commences]

( stopppp!!!!!!! let him, you act as if he wouldn't let npckun go out and do some crazy shit! look at steph, she's out there, he lets her do whatever she wants. )

People get bored.

( like how he gets bored... like how he's now thinking about that as an option, that said they better be at the workshop by now, because komaeda's going to walk in after he lets npckun go, this is where they needed to go, right? )

[adsum]

[ ?? they're a good honest shopkeeper! pure. an angel. the crazy shit has to be subtle

anyways, you ask that as if I remembered that's where they're going and didn't need to click thread from start to learn why they're going to the workshop but apparently they are and they're going to make a birdhouse. ]

Ooh, we're here! Go find me a ruler and a protractor and a pencil! A carpenter pencil— it's the kind that's flat so it doesn't roll away, and the graphite's harder so it won't break on wood.

[commences]

( not how they're ESCAPING THE CONVERSATION!!! insane, mean of them... they abuse komaeda's concern.

he'll get a ruler but he's depressed about it, like he's frowning as he look through the utensils of what they need... he finds a protractor, and maybe a colored pencil, but he throws that on the floor.

he's looking give him a moment. )

...

[adsum]

[ They look over when they hear clacking on the floor.

...Komaeda, get your act together. They trot over to pick it up, setting it back on the table. ]

Yeah, see how these roll so easily? A carpenter's pencil doesn't do that, so you don't lose them.

[commences]

( ... he lets a few more pencils fall on the floor like he understands, but also he doesn't want to listen. he's tired of being happy now, he wants to wallow in whatever negativity he's got to offer.

that's until he finds a flat carpenter pencil, and he holds it out to npckun to have. )

...

[adsum]

Yes! That's the one.

[ They step over the scattered pencils and take that one from Komaeda's hands, laying the wood on the ground and sitting in front of it all cross legged, pile of wood on one side, a wider plank being used as a clipboard for the piece of paper they're doing rough calculations on.

They're going to trace out with pencil where to cut and then hand the wood over to Komaeda. He gets to use the table saw. ]

[commences]

( he could cut his hand off with that, but you know, he'll use it properly, and hold the plank still to cut along the line that's been shown to him. one or two times he almost nabs his finger, but he's pretty lucky that he almost tripped over that pencil that rolled in his direction huh? pulls him away just in time from almost losing a thumb. )

I wonder... if you'll find a bleeding heart dove.

[adsum]

We won't. They live in the Philippines.

[ npckun watches him carefully. blood is okay, technically, because they can just paint over it, but it's still gross and if Komaeda loses a finger they're not going to know what to do besides ??? stick it in a glass of milk, this is what you're supposed to do for teeth, they think. ]

[commences]

...Hm? You've never seen one outside the Philippines?

( not everyone is lucky like komaeda, but npckun shouldn't just chop it up to having to be in that location to see them. he wants to see one since it's the bird that comes to mind, maybe he does lose a finger to make it happen... tempting, but he looks up to see npckun staring at him, and he lifts a hand to pull at his shirt to look at it. the little red color in the middle of their chest is the best part, but wouldn't be for komaeda's attire so he searches for a stain.

no stain... )

...Is there something on my face? I know that I'm ugly, you should keep coloring.

( stop looking at him? )

[adsum]

I've never seen one outside a book.

[ Really, not everybody is as luck as Komaeda is, getting to fly around the world and escape plane crashes or whatever. ]

...I just wanted to watch you work. You don't like it.

[commences]

...Hm. What do you know about them?

( not as if they're komaeda's favorite or anything, but you know... let's see how much npckun pays attention to what they read. he tilts his head a little, canting his head to the side... watch him work? he doesn't like it? well, he doesn't like a lot of things. )

Come closer.

[adsum]

[ okay... They pick up their things and moves everything towards Komaeda, sitting next to him with their back pressed against the side of his leg so they can be there and not stare at him. ]

Mm... They're doves, and they usually stay in the underbrush of the forest ground instead of nesting in trees.

[ That's it, really. It's a bird, nothing too exciting outside of appearances, from what they remember reading about them. ]

[commences]

They're shy, and also very secretive, but anyone with a bleeding heart would be...

( think more than their living habits, npckun, there's a reason komaeda chose this type of bird — he pushes the wood forward, miraculously none of the shavings really making it onto his clothes, but some fly towards the shopkeeper, dusting on top of their head, and komaeda stares down. he knows already that touching their head is what they shy away from themselves, and while komaeda doesn't mind it, he wonders if he should just allow it to stay there. )

It's the same as those who wear their heart on their sleeve... exposed for everyone to see.

[adsum]

Mm...

[ They duck their head a little, some of the shavings falling onto their shoulders but most remain on their head as they tug absently at their sleeves. Their heart isn't there. It's not. They try to keep it close, in their hands more than their chest, but sometimes they forget and they reach out and it's there.

... ]

It'd be nice if one chose this house. Then it'll be safe.